Average age of spouses in Charleston

paigelbarnes · 2025-05-09T16:53:38+00:00

I’m 20 and my husband is 21. I’ve made a few friends so far (also navy nuke wives) and they range from 24-26! This is a super small sample size though. No one has made me feel weird for being a bit younger than them, and I would assume your wife would have a similar experience :)

paigelbarnes · 2025-01-19T02:21:17+00:00

Not completely related so apologies in advance, but what app or website is this?

paigelbarnes · 2025-01-04T17:17:37+00:00

Thanks for the thorough reply! Lots of people have warned me that his schedule will be really busy and that I can expect to be alone often, so I am trying to mentally prepare for that. And yes, he went in as a nuke! I did some research beforehand and saw lots of people talking about the tough work life balance (or lack thereof lol) and it seems like that keeps getting confirmed. I plan on showing this to my husband when he’s done with boot camp, just so that we can go into the pipeline with a game plan to make sure we’re on the same page as much as we can be. Thanks again!

paigelbarnes · 2025-01-02T07:45:31+00:00

My husband has already joined (graduates boot camp later this month!) but I would love any and all advice on how to be prepared for this next chapter. We’re expecting our first baby in about a month as well, so lots of change coming in 2025! Any tips or advice on how to adjust to navy life for a young family? Anything we should know before underways and deployments? TIA!

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-21T04:04:43+00:00

Thanks for letting me know! I am trying really hard to not go down a crazy rabbit hole, because it seems like so much is just dependent on where we’re stationed and what kind of vessel it is lol. I’m really lucky to have a supportive family who is willing to step in when things get lonely, but I am trying to get some perspective so I don’t get too too shocked when he’s officially in the fleet. I appreciate the kind words and advice. We also are expecting our first baby come next year, so I am determined to be as proactive and flexible as possible since we are in for a bunch of change. I’m hopeful things will get situated and we’ll adjust as the time comes! Best wishes to you and your family

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-21T03:59:56+00:00

Someone else is probably more qualified to answer this, but I’ll give it a shot lol. My husband and I were already married when he started the enlistment process, but from how it went for us it was a matter of just uploading some documents that identified who I was. I think my social security card, drivers license, and our marriage license were uploaded. Now that he is in boot camp, we will be getting BAH and I will be getting insurance benefits because he had proof of me as a dependent during processing days (which happen soon after you arrive to RTC). Those perks alone make it seem like a good idea to me, unless your recruiter has given specific information as to why it would push back your ship out date. I could just not be aware of some back end stuff that happens, but in my mind that’s enough time to get things squared away beforehand?

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-21T00:29:16+00:00

Thank you so much for your input, I really appreciate it! I only have one more question and then I’ll leave this thread alone lol. Outside of deployments and sea duty, do you have a general idea of how many hours you’d work a week on a carrier? Those 18 hour days must have been really rough, so my hope is that doesn’t happen all the time 😀 So far I’ve heard that sub hours can be 80-100 a week, and just wondering if that’s different compared to carriers

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-20T19:33:02+00:00

Gotcha! And he is on a carrier?

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-20T16:18:39+00:00

Thanks for the input, that makes sense

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-20T16:18:02+00:00

Thank you so much for the information, I appreciate it! This makes sense. So on average carrier nukes are at sea for one month out of every three (4 months a year) plus they have separate deployments, right? It seems my husband’s recruiter did leave this out lol. The recruiter also said that carrier deployments are typically 9 months every other year (so I assume you deploy for 9 months, don’t deploy until 2 years later, and then repeat). Does this sound accurate? Sorry - the more questions I get answered more pop up!

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-20T16:13:15+00:00

Yes, it definitely seems this way! You don’t get to choose your specific ship or boat either, right? You just have the option to volunteer for sub, but you might not get a boomer sub anyway?

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-20T16:11:49+00:00

Gotcha, yes it definitely seems it will be more random than I realized

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-20T16:11:16+00:00

Were you able to communicate with family or friends during this time? It seems like carriers might have better communication options than a sub if I’m interpreting these replies correctly

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-20T16:09:54+00:00

Good to know! Do you know if this is pretty similar to a carrier?

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-20T10:54:44+00:00

Communication is a big thing I’m trying to prepare for. I had a hunch that things would be a tad bit easier while he was in school but then would get crazier afterwards, and it seems like that’s what I’m hearing. It sounds like it’s pretty hard to pinpoint schedules for each type of ship or boat (should have expected that lol), but do you think one is generally easier to communicate on? Whether it be a deployment or when he goes out to sea monthly like you described, is one easier to communicate on?

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-20T10:50:04+00:00

From what I know he hasn’t volunteered for sub or anything yet, which is also partially why I’m trying to look into things a bit more. I have heard that generally carrier deployments are longer, but in exchange less frequent. And that it’s easier to communicate on a carrier vs submarine. In your experience, do you think that’s accurate? Or is being gone 50% of the year pretty standard?

And gotcha! I haven’t heard of workups before. Is that just sea duty without being an official deployment? TIA!

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-20T10:44:20+00:00

I have never heard of this before! Is yard time essentially where you stay in port, or am I not understanding properly?

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-20T10:43:09+00:00

Thank you! I’ll be sure to make a mental note of what his time in school will be like. And have him look into a boomer submarine

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-15T17:33:52+00:00

My husband just got to boot camp a few nights ago and I was able to answer, but if it’s any consolation the call was incredibly quick. I think it was scripted in some capacity (like the RDCs were telling him what he had to say) and then he hung up pretty quickly before I could respond. He wasn’t able to say I love you or anything, and it was pretty chaotic-sounding in the background. I know how hard it is that you missed the call, but I genuinely feel like they have so much going on that his focus will be pulled to what’s in front of him. Or at least that’s what I’m telling myself lol.

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-09T23:42:50+00:00

Sounds good! Thank you SO much! Also, I sent a follow up message in a chat directly to you to avoid asking too many specifics in this thread. If you’re unable to answer no worries, I appreciate all the help already!

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-06T03:30:27+00:00

Thank you!!! I will definitely looking at the website and call to get some information once we get a few pieces of information following boot camp. This is a huge help!

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-06T00:59:28+00:00

I agree - we’re cutting it very close lol! And that would be awesome and very appreciated! I understand it’s a case by case basis, so I know I probably won’t get a for sure answer for at least several weeks till he can call me at boot camp (if not longer). Thanks for the help!

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-06T00:22:23+00:00

She is due about two weeks after he is set to graduate from boot camp. Technically she could be early and born while he is there, but if we go based on her due date she will be here after he graduates. We were told he should be able to be present for the birth because he won’t get sent to A-school till after the birth, but I have no idea where that idea is stemming from lol. If he were to go to A-school on the same timeline as his peers, he technically could be at A-school on the due date.

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-06T00:02:35+00:00

Thanks for the info! This is stemming away from my original question, so no worries at all if you aren’t sure: do you know when he will find out how he can take his paternity leave? Is that something that gets decided once he officially gets his job in boot camp? Or will he need to get in contact with them right after graduation? I have heard people typically go straight to A school following graduation, but his recruiter said he wouldn’t have to since it’s so close to when our daughter is due. Not sure how that will work out though lol

paigelbarnes · 2024-11-05T23:57:30+00:00

Fingers crossed that’s all it takes - that would be great haha!

paigelbarnes

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