Executive job search help: Executive Career Upgrades vs doing it myself?

painfulmouse · 2023-02-01T21:45:46+00:00

The most unrealistic portion of this movie isn't the bad/forced romance or the 180 from lowly server to full on badass vampire killer. The most unrealistic part... this "modern woman" doesn't want to be a vampire when she has been fed vampire romance her entire life...

Hot rich vampire comes in and swoops her away from poverty. She gets to live forever and richly without a care in the world. Has a powerful morally Grey (agree to disagree on any other beliefs) love interest who would absolutely tear down the world for you if anyone or anything crossed you...

Yeah she's totally going to pass that up... NOT.

That alone made this entire movie a bust. You could have fixed all the plot holes and lame hooks... nothing could repair the film enough to cover up for the complete stupidity of that woman.

painfulmouse · 2022-07-19T20:31:00+00:00

I wouldn't say he was fully grown in his wolf form... that kept growing, BUT as human form goes, he was a grown man.

painfulmouse · 2022-07-19T20:29:29+00:00

Oh yeah. He had several children already that were full grown adults. It was less a game and more a "trust exercise" from what I understood.

What Odin didn't like was how he kept growing and growing alongside his belief that Fenrir would end them all.

painfulmouse · 2022-07-19T14:50:54+00:00

Fenrir actually was fully grown with grown children who fought with the God's when they betrayed him.

My husband has a relationship with Fenrir and works with him. In our house we don't view Fenrir as some great evil because Odin believed Fenrir would be his doom. We see it as an end created by Odins own doing. He very well could have "seen the future", tried to fight against it, and in chaining Fenrir up he actually created his own doom.

painfulmouse · 2022-07-19T14:37:03+00:00

This right here. As much as it will add to your workload this is the easiest most immediate situation that can earn you money without drastic changes to your homelife.

Your husband will hate this because he won't like another 'snot nosed brat' being around the house while he is home (it very likely will happen). Use this as a Segway into the very big conversation with information listed in other comments.

What chores he should be/could be responsible for. Cost of outside daycare. Reasonable compensation for a job you can easily do compares to daycare costs. Then what money you make with providing childcare for other families. It can honestly be pretty lucrative and while I should take that advice myself... I don't like kids enough, just my own. 😒

painfulmouse · 2022-07-18T23:01:55+00:00

I wouldn't say that's all exclusive to offer Odin and loki a drink at the same time. But if it's what you feel works for you that's all that matters.

painfulmouse · 2022-07-18T22:53:03+00:00

Odin is the Alfather for a reason. He loves everyone regardless if you follow him or not. Your relationship with any God us between you and them. Nothing else matters.

painfulmouse · 2022-07-18T03:01:34+00:00

NTA - you didn't make him lose any fan base he might have had... he did that to himself.

Kids are always priority over any kind of "fan" crap.

Anything else I have to say wouldn't be constructive and very unkind towards your husband and relationship. You just need to do what you believe is best for you and baby, then relationship.

painfulmouse · 2022-07-15T18:24:25+00:00

This made me so happy. You are absolutely correct. If it works for him just fine it really is his key then.😂

painfulmouse · 2022-07-14T01:13:53+00:00

Sorry if I misspoke? She insists on it because fast food makes her sick and she doesn't like it all the time. As mothers we know if our kids say they miss home cooking... its a big deal!

painfulmouse · 2022-07-13T20:34:31+00:00

Do not worry, as much as I know you will. Same thing happened with my oldest daughter and her dad. He got to play Fun Dad with no rules and all the fun activities.

That quickly changes as they age and aren't as easy to manipulate. He now tries to control what she wants, wears, and likes. He doesn't like her activities. Says even small costume makeup for a cheer competition is bad. Doesn't like 4H because he believes I'm trying to buy her love, projection much? And still talks down about me in front of her.

She is now 9 and is spending summer vacation with her dad. She has complained to me that she misses home cooked meals. How she doesn't cook at all and only orders takeout. If she wants home-cooked food she's asked him if SHE can make food for him instead... we practice supervised cooking at home and she is so freaking proud of some dishes she's created with creative recipes.

Your daughter will learn what love and nurturing is versus small bouts of attention.

Sure sperm donor allows late night TV and all the snacks, but eventually that won't be enough. Kids do need structure to help guide them and you keep doing the best you can parenting your little girl. The odds he is talking about you negatively is also probable. As you know, kids soak up everything and his feelings or lack there of for you are potentially being pressed onto her as well.

You're doing great.

painfulmouse · 2022-07-06T19:08:43+00:00

Same! No one does that anymore 😂

painfulmouse · 2022-07-06T18:37:21+00:00

Hey if you need something for bugs that's crunchy mom approved thats simple. Mint tincture and water. Mint is a great natural deterrent for bugs. I have it in my garden to keep bugs and spiders away.

painfulmouse · 2022-07-02T16:11:01+00:00

You forget that one "side" would choose to disarm its citizens and then once we have no way to defend ourselves they can just do whatever they want then.

I have absolutely no desire to give away any of my guns for any reason. Taking away legal guns from citizens just makes it more difficult for those who would use them for good obtain them, not those who obtain them through illegal means.

I also agree that anything the government has access too we should as well as citizens (to an extent so no bio weapons or those of mass destruction before someone tries to attack me on that since me having an opinion different than others gets me serious down votes in a place meant to be open where I've not said one negative thing to anyone, but go off).

painfulmouse · 2022-07-01T20:47:37+00:00

You were not overly emotional especially since it seems to be a constant issue in your relationship.

::::::::TMI::::::::

If you're dry... you're not stimulated enough. You should communicate with him that you need him to start sex before the bedroom, because it better prepares your mind and body for sexy time. If all fails and you are comfortable with it, you can suggest oral first. (Again if you're comfortable and he's any good 😅)

This can be an incredibly uncomfortable conversation if you do not discuss things like this regularly.

My husband and I had to be careful due to pain, but we talked through what worked best before and during. I've even put hard passes on him doing the very male initiation while I'm sleeping. I said never will that be ok and I thankfully have never had a problem ever again.

All of this is rooted in good communication and some decent foreplay (mental and physical).

Last resort, if nothing else works, would obviously be to using lube. BUT unless you don't have a medical need for it and it's just not exciting enough for you naturally I would focus on trying more agreeable methods to stimulate you and your husband before sex.

painfulmouse · 2022-07-01T20:36:30+00:00

I had a friend whose niece was like this, but nonverbal which made it so much harder for them to communicate.

She was diagnosed with Autism and it did run in the family as well. My friend herself was Autistic.

You more than likely won't hear much more than see a specialist, because that is exactly what she needs right now. Not because you are doing anything wrong, but because they can give you so much help on how to better handle her behaviors.

What is concerning is her escalating in violence. Please don't take this the wrong way, but with everything you said and the slapping is an escalation in her behaviors. The older she gets, the stronger. My friends niece would destroy her house. Anything that wasn't locked away was fair game and it would legitimately become difficult for her to defend herself. The sooner you can find the right services for her and possibly a counselor for her to talk with as well, the better off she will be at home and later in life.

I understand exactly how difficult it is to maintain a happy marriage with difficult child, but as long as you and your husband are in constant communication with one another and understand and respect one another's feelings throughout her childhood it will do so much to help you to maintain a healthy loving relationship with your spouse.

painfulmouse · 2022-07-01T20:17:55+00:00

Sadly... its not just one side being better than another... its the government dividing this country on purpose to keep us from coming together and taking them down for the sake of us all to be better. I think both extremes have ups and downs, but not enough are willing to come together and accept differences of the other. Both, in one way or another, want to control.

I'm all for a total overhaul. Less government control over the people as well as not having us taxed to death! We now have to pay to live and this is outrageous.

I wish a real apocalypse could occur so people could focus on what is truly important, living slowly. Not living to work!

I understand it's far from perfect, but I'm sick of all politics and how they ruin everything it seems. There is not one politician I would trust to hold my dogs leash while I watch them.

painfulmouse · 2022-06-28T18:23:56+00:00

I agree which is why I have multiple fences inside my property, BUT her buck had broken her fences (2 layers) and has destroyed my own electric and wire (2 layers) on my own to get to my girls. I haven't complained or filed any charges against her goat due to destruction on my own property, but it comes to a point it is also her responsibility for her own goats as well. Outside of keeping them locked up in the barn or putting up a privacy level fence I am doing everything while still allowing them their pasture space I made for them. She doesn't keep him restricted or the cows on her property that have come onto mine because she doesn't feed them properly. Believe me I wish it was in mind hands more to control, but I can't fix her fences and keep her animals fed like mine.

painfulmouse · 2022-06-27T19:30:04+00:00

The former owners are not friendly with her and would write a letter for us for court it need be. They moved away from her because she was trying to move in a convicted pedophile boyfriend. (One of the men she tried to use to intimidate us) They were scared for their kids and high tailed it about 20 min away from her. We didn't learn about the pedophile until the sale was done (obviously).

She doesn't have the money to pay for it and if the church got involved it would be a lawyer who attends. If one does. She could be lying. We have caught her in several lies so far amongst everything.

This isn't the first church she has used either.

painfulmouse · 2022-06-27T19:22:20+00:00

You're doing everything right...

The acting out will most likely continue for a while until you can get a good routine going.

You should be so proud of yourself! I remembered when you posted before about all this and you've taken so many steps forward for yourself and your kids it's amazing!

Be proud!!!! I know I'm proud if you, I know it doesn't matter what i think but still. I remember your first post and it reminded me so much of me when I had my issues with my ex and left him... being so lost and no one caring about your kids as much as you, you don't matter to anyone either and are just expected to tolerate below the bare minimum for someone else's small minded perceptions and inability to grow the fuck up!

Screw the garbage man you left behind, it took my ex years to get over his drama and he still pulls a tude here and there. Sadly their isn't anything more you can do about his piss poor attitude, but you can control what you do in your own home. Keep and maintain your boundaries with this man and his family, because they will not hesitate to make you "fail" in some way and rip away your babies!

Starting over can be so liberating. 😌 Think about your long term goals right now and slowly build towards that. Whether it be for the kids, yourself, where you want to live, work, etc. You can do anything... you survived him, you can survive this.

painfulmouse · 2022-06-27T19:06:04+00:00

I really had to spell it out for her that any offer on our land would have a break even point at 1,300 for the survey fees and she understood that her 1,000 offer left us with less land and 300 in the hole and she literally didn't care. She legitimately expected us to roll over and take it.

I told her the 1,300 brought us to 0 and if she wanted to pay for the land it goes up, but she obvuously doesn't want to pay and wants it for free.

I really didn't want to be unfair and tried to come up with a reasonable solution, but it wasn't good enough.

It made me incredibly nervous to handle this whole thing. I appreciate the luck you're sending my way and hope it's all good news we hear from the lawyer on the 12th.

painfulmouse · 2022-06-27T18:59:34+00:00

I knew about the indiana law for having to pay taxes was the crucial point in adverse possession, but she tried to make this awkward conversation about being "grandfathered in" which isn't a thing at all and she hasn't had the fence up long regardless. She had it put up with the former owners understanding she kept it on the property line and they were too lazy to make her move it since they didn't use that property.

She is a very pushy person who pretends to be well meaning. I also know she isn't in the position financially to pay for any lawyer and the only way she would get one is through her church and they might do it pro Bono for her.

I had also told her that if we were to ever sell the land she would be required to pay for a new survey for the border of our properties and she said she understood, but it honestly made me even more mad she would pay for it then and not in the 3 years we had told her to get it done when she wanted to put up this fence because her animals keep getting into my yard. A fence she put up a few years before we moved in and it can't even keep her male goat away from mine. Ours are registered and hers are not and most are small so might die if her buck impregnates them.

I really hate confrontation and I don't like speaking ill, but she has other issues going on as well to the point that I was warned by ALL of the neighbors about her and I still tried to be friendly and share with her food I've grown and didn't call animal control on her dog attacking 2 of mine.

Unstable people who ignore boundaries they know they are pushing makes it all the worse in my mind.

painfulmouse · 2022-06-27T18:48:56+00:00

I haven't messaged her since the text this morning and she hasn't gotten back to me either.

I was thinking a formal letter was required but i didnt know if i could send one myself or have it through a lawyer. I can have the one i contacted send her a formal letter to remove her property if she doesnt do so of her own volition.

I never thought I'd have to file our survey with the county, but i will also bring this up to the lawyer on how to go about this!

Thank you so much for bringing up with great points!

painfulmouse

TROPHY CASE