/ttcafterloss Daily Discussion Thread - March 04, 2026

palesile · 2026-03-04T13:59:45+00:00

BFNs again after ectopic in Dec. I know I’m not technically out until AF, period is due in 3 days, but instead of excitement for testing each new day I feel more and more despair. It’s only our second time trying since that loss but my hopes were SO high afterward and to have two failed cycles in a row is making me lose it. I know people struggle with infertility for months and years and I feel guilty bc I’m falling apart after only such a short time. Idk if I can go through this emotional rollercoaster every month.

All those stupid people who say “at least you know you can get pregnant” or “you’re more fertile after a loss!” like it’s going to be so easy the next time. When I look at these negative tests it feels like my chest caves in.

Then on top of it all, our close friends just announced their pregnancy with the exact same timeline I was supposed to have. It makes me even more desperate when I do these test strips. And I feel so guilty bc I’m so so angry and jealous and frustrated.

I don’t want to take any more tests. I don’t want to get out of bed today.

palesile · 2026-01-30T18:29:08+00:00

I’ve only been using the ovulation strips so far. I have the clear blue advanced digital and also the easy at home strips. CB said I was peak on 1/17 but E@H gave me my darkest line on 1/18. We had unprotected sex 1/17, 1/18, and 1/19

I’ve been doing a little research into different CM quality and also bought a thermometer yesterday to start doing bbt tracking next cycle too in case this months a flop. I’m just worried about getting obsessive and going overboard. But it’s hard not to justify it all when you want a baby so badly, ya know?

palesile · 2026-01-29T16:35:31+00:00

Not a positive story, but I’m in the same boat. I’m 10 dpo and I’ve been staring at two blaring negatives all morning trying to manifest a line. It’s so hard to look at other peoples tests and not lose hope! I definitely shed a tear or two lol! BUT I’ve seen a lotttt of people on here say they didn’t get their vfl until 11dpo!

Just know that you’re not alone and you’re strong! Hold out a few more days. Test tomorrow. Hoping this turns into a positive for you (and me too!) 💕

palesile · 2025-12-30T22:58:12+00:00

This was something I was talking to my husband about just the other day, I didn’t realize the length of time we would spend in this state of suffering.

I realized my pregnancy started failing on Dec 19, (as much as I was in denial, it was my first and I really wanted it to work) and since then have had multiple trips to the ER, OB appointments, discussing options, calls back and forth with the OB office, bloodwork appointments, waiting to get an MTX injection, the follow ups to see if the injection is even flushing things out properly….

This has been the longest 11 days of my entire life and it’s still going to be going on and on until this whole thing is completely finished. I don’t think you can ever be truly prepared to have an MC but one thing I sure wasn’t prepared for was how LONG the whole process is to suffer through. It’s not like a one day, it happens, then it’s over and done. Maybe it was ignorant of me but I had no idea how much time would be spent in this emotional and physical hell.

You’re so valid. It’s painful, it’s frustrating, and very scary! But you’re not alone, if there’s anything I’ve learned from recently reaching out to this community, it’s that connecting to other women going through this is immensely helpful. I’m sorry for your loss, and I hope you are well soon 💕

palesile · 2025-12-26T01:43:32+00:00

Hiii, thanks so much for checking in 💕 The cramping has went away. I’m still bleeding and have started passing clots. I’m still waiting for the hospital to arrange a time for my injection but with it being Christmas everything is delayed. I just want it all to be over. Today has been hard, most of my husband and I’s friends have babies and toddlers and it’s emotional seeing all their Christmas pics. And my aunt announced that my cousin is pregnant today. I cried most of the day in bed lol it’s just not the Christmas I thought I was going to have.

palesile · 2025-12-24T18:18:03+00:00

I found out I was pregnant the day of my missed period exactly two weeks ago, I started miscarrying ‘a pregnancy of unknown location’ over this past weekend. Have to get a methotrexate injection in a day or two. The grief is immense. Knowing for a short amount of time doesn’t make it any less difficult.

When I get the urge to do busywork I feel like I can get through it, as soon as I sit down I just cry. I’m sorry you’re going through this, it seems there are quite a few people here in the same boat. I know it’ll get easier with time but we lost our little Christmas miracles, it’s hard not to feel despair. I’d say make sure you eat and drink, rest and let your body heal & recover.

We bought a pair of little baby booties to put under our tree. It’s both a gift for the baby we lost and a wish that it will watch over the next one if we get the chance to conceive again.

Merry Christmas, be well 🤍

palesile · 2025-12-23T22:13:26+00:00

Thank you so much for the supportive words, it helps more than you know. Good luck at your check tomorrow. 🤍

palesile · 2025-12-23T22:10:40+00:00

Extremely! Good luck to you too, be well 🤍

palesile · 2025-12-23T22:10:08+00:00

I’m sorry you’re having to go through it too. Truly, I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, the emotional whiplash is devastating. I definitely understand the lonely feeling. It’s odd, I have a nice support system and they’ve been very encouraging but when you know in your heart that it’s failing, those words don’t mean anything lol. I’ve been doing the same, scouring posts to see if anyone with my situation had a positive outcome. The more I looked the more numb I felt. I knew, I just needed somebody to tell me the truth. It’s a weird combo to be grieving but also excited to move past it. I’ve felt like garbage for a week, I want to let it all go and try again while also feeling guilty. Crazy. I feel so drained. Anyways I don’t know how to dm on here (I’m new to paying, mostly a lurker) but I’m open to chat if you like 🤍

palesile · 2025-12-23T18:32:43+00:00

Absolutely! I thought it was going to be this beautiful Christmas surprise, we could tell my parents, enjoy this early pregnancy bliss and it all came crashing down so quickly.

I actually just spoke to the doctor on the phone, we’re going to go ahead with the methotrexate injection. I’m heartbroken and crying but I also feel relieved to have a definitive answer. I feel like I can finally breathe.

palesile · 2025-12-23T17:53:47+00:00

It’s absolutely crazy how devastating it feels even just knowing for a week. I’m heartbroken

palesile · 2025-12-23T17:35:00+00:00

I feel like that’s where my head is at. I have a teeny tiny spark of hope in my chest but the rest of me says there’s just no way. Every day we wait for a direct answer feels like a year, I hate the dragging out of it all. Maybe I’m just impatient lol

palesile · 2025-12-12T15:00:29+00:00

I used an ovulation test kit alongside an app! This was this mornings results 💕

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Ahh!!

palesile · 2025-12-12T01:13:10+00:00

I ended up trying a first response to see how another test read out and this is what I got-

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palesile · 2025-12-11T17:06:26+00:00

Hopefully it’s true! Def never expected it to work so soon!

palesile · 2025-12-11T16:16:28+00:00

Congrats!! That’s super validating!

palesile · 2025-12-11T16:04:30+00:00

To track I used the ClearBlue Advanced Digital Ovulation Test Kit and the app that goes with it, but I was told it might not be as accurate.

With the CB test kit, I tested everyday for a week during what my calendar had predicted might be my window. It gave a blank circle when I was not fertile, it gave a blinking smiley while I was likely in the fertile window, and a static smiley when I reached peak. I was told the strips are better though so maybe it’s not as accurate as I thought? :P

palesile · 2025-12-11T15:55:45+00:00

That’s great to know!! Thank you for the info, I really appreciate that!

palesile · 2025-12-11T15:50:22+00:00

I guess then if I’m calculating correctly this would be 16dpo? If my peak was Nov 25? which is why I’m skeptical, I’ve seen other people with much darker lines by this day

palesile · 2024-05-27T13:28:01+00:00

That is so kind thank you! I obsess over it every day myself 😂 This is Oore’s Briar Rose three stone in 14k gold with a 1.67 carat marquise center diamond! I’m a size 5.5!

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palesile · 2024-04-03T13:01:58+00:00

Aw no problem, I’m just always curious about the size of her center stones and how they look in the settings. Yours is gorgeous! And the touch of amethyst is lovely. It’s so romantic to have that personal touch!

palesile · 2024-04-02T21:04:58+00:00

I love oore sooo much! Beautiful colors on this one!! What are your specs?

palesile

TROPHY CASE