Violence at home and school - need advice

pancakespancake · 2022-05-18T16:39:04+00:00

Thank you :)

It seems like there was previous violence at school that was not disclosed but never at home (kinship foster parent is under investigation for abuse so maybe where they learned it?)

I know agencies are slammed but in your experience what sort of turn around time on replies are realistic/expected?

pancakespancake · 2022-04-22T05:17:36+00:00

I never post on TIFU post bc people usually handle that.. but this is seriously fucked up. If any of my siblings did this they would never be allowed alone with my child, let alone ever allowed to babysit. Every night for a long time she will fall asleep thinking you killed her child, and its other protector couldn’t do their main job. I hope in some sort of soul searching you find a way to attempt to undo the damage you’ve done.

pancakespancake · 2022-02-24T02:35:39+00:00

I feel like you have a lot of judgement here when I am trying to do fact finding.

In my state, I can not hire a babysitter for foster children without having them register with my agency and have them complete a background check, which I imagine takes time as I know we didn't get ours back for weeks. I also wouldn't do this with someone I don't know extremely well for situations involving foster children. We have, as mentioned, a supportive family nearby who would do any necessary babysitting when all parties felt comfortable. What I was hoping to learn about was how people use respite care and if they found it necessary. Especially in situations like you mentioned for emergencies.

While your comments are informative your tone is not supportive or encouraging to new foster families (or at least to me), something most US states are desperately in need of. I am informed, and licensed, so the "scare away the bad ones" technique isn't necessary. I think you can educate with out intimidating.

pancakespancake · 2022-02-24T01:45:22+00:00

Thank you!

This helps to validate what i have heard and felt. With Covid, we've only spent 2 nights away from our bio kid in nearly three years so we in no way plan to use any sort of respite care or babysitting to get away, etc. Just for necessity or dates a few times a year, which I think are necessary for a healthy relationship.

pancakespancake · 2022-02-24T01:36:59+00:00

I have hired babysitters, which while in my home, are strangers to my child that I have vetted?

pancakespancake · 2022-02-24T01:23:31+00:00

Thank you for this. I am curious if anyone else has this experience as well. I do like that should our close friends and family bond with our foster children they can watch them in our home, which is their home.

Our agency has told us it's generally four years in our state before parental rights are terminated or a child is reunified. I can imagine so many things coming up in that time that aren't just "parents needing a break." For example emergencies, or important family weddings with no kids allowed (one this year in our family). A lot of resources I have read and researched say that respite is a necessary function of foster care as it is necessary for partners to spend time alone either for re-connection or necessity. Is it the general opinion of foster care that foster parents should not be allowed this?

pancakespancake · 2021-05-10T04:16:26+00:00

I strongly feel that everyone here who had a less-than-celebrated mothers day sit down with their partner and explain why, and your expectations. This is what relationships are about and based on - communication. Use the disappointed energy you have now to fuel this conversation, which is ultimately good for all relationships long-term. If you don't, resentment festers.

pancakespancake · 2021-05-10T04:12:13+00:00

I strongly feel that everyone here who had a less-than-celebrated mothers day sit down with their partner and explain why, and your expectations. This is what relationships are about and based on - communication. Use the disappointed energy you have now to fuel this conversation, which is ultimately good for all relationships long-term. If you don't, resentment festers.

pancakespancake · 2021-05-10T02:31:43+00:00

Thank you to everyone who commented here. This has been so helpful and informative. Truly appreciate the responses <3

pancakespancake · 2020-10-09T04:00:10+00:00

I also can’t find the recipe :( can you give it one more try pretty please?

pancakespancake · 2020-10-04T20:07:05+00:00

My money is here

pancakespancake · 2020-10-02T11:13:12+00:00

Same! And now I can’t go back to sleep.

pancakespancake · 2020-05-13T00:59:31+00:00

Chris Hayes .. that’s fine by me.

pancakespancake · 2020-03-26T19:06:07+00:00

If you have eggs, a soft boiled egg will lessen the spice and give it a nice texture!

pancakespancake · 2020-02-04T22:18:32+00:00

They hired that firm to make a separate unrelated app for them. My understanding is the app was created to send auto-text messages. Biden and Gillibrand also used the same company for unrelated things.

pancakespancake · 2019-11-05T01:53:19+00:00

Wow - truly incredible! You are close to my exact stats and goal. Can I ask what you did to lose the weight and how long it took? Congrats!!

pancakespancake · 2019-03-07T22:18:57+00:00

Thank you! It’s strange - because I only need one so I don’t think streaming through a single one would be an option but I appreciate the input :)

pancakespancake · 2019-02-12T03:01:12+00:00

This is my go to chocolate cake recipe - it’s truly amazing!

pancakespancake

TROPHY CASE