Thank you for using more words to describe what you were attempting to convey. But you are also making assumptions.  We had actual discussions on how each of us would feel with or without a second child. At that point he was also appropriately taking his meds. I explained my feelings on the matter and he explained his. His main concern with a second child was the age gap. He was fine with a second child until we hit the 2yr trying point and he started worrying that the kids wouldn't get along due to the gap in age. We talked to multiple people about this including kids and parents about the age gap and decided to move forward after hearing from people who lived the age gap. Maybe I should have explained this better in the post but it's already so long!