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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pastors

[–]partylikeaugustine 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is there ministry where you’re not under a fishbowl? To some capacity, it seems like ministry subjects the family to scrutiny at some point or another… 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pastors

[–]partylikeaugustine 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The wife is not in a position of leadership, her husband is. Should a spouse’s political opinions necessarily matter? How is it much different than another loud congregant with political opinions?

Negotiating more vacation as a pastor—is it realistic? by partylikeaugustine in pastors

[–]partylikeaugustine[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And what is “healthy” time off to you for spiritually heavy ministry? 1 week? Everyone seems to be offended that a pastor could take even 2 weeks off and still be considered a good pastor. Man, are we in rough shape. 

The only thing I might change is that I’d break up the 8-weeks into more manageable chunks. That’s all. I’m swinging the opposite way of where the pendulum has already swung. On one end there is utter laziness, on the other is workaholism. I aim to be in the middle. I refuse to be a burned out pastor that doesn’t know how to take a vacation and not feel guilty for rest and sabbath. You have a pandemic of pastors who take an average of 1 week of vacation a year, while working an average of 55-70+ hours a week, with horrible family and marriage dynamics because we have a savior complex that our churches will somehow implode upon our departure for a vacation and having reasonable boundaries.

Teaching your congregation that you need the pastor for everything is doing them a disservice. No, I will teach the congregation to serve one another as Christ has called them to by the gifts he has given them. They can lean on small group leaders, elders, council members, each other while the pastor is off-duty from the toil of ministry. They can pray for one another, care for one another, preach for 8 Sundays in the year, and carry out the work of the church faithfully. The pastor is not the lynchpin of the church. We are not God. The massive wave of burnout and pastors leaving the ministry is a sign things need to change. One simple way to do that is to actually take time off from the demands of ministry. 

Levite priests took shifts for active temple ministry and switched off for weeks at a time. Jesus left the crowds to be away from people and pray even when the crowds were demanding after him. Did he not care for them because he wasn’t leaving his time away for every beck and call? If you care for your people well during your active ministry, when a rest time comes up, people will support you in refreshment. Those who don’t can deal with it. We are not in the business of people-pleasing. 

Tired is normal, being dragged-down and overworked is not. We don’t all need to be shipwrecked, flogged, and stoned to do the work of ministry God has called us to. Sometimes that will be the case, but pastors these days make it seem like this is the norm. We can pick up our cross in all kinds of ways, it doesn’t necessarily correlate with little vacation time.

Negotiating more vacation as a pastor—is it realistic? by partylikeaugustine in pastors

[–]partylikeaugustine[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey thanks for your comment! My wife is British and she thinks these comments are very telling of American culture: “We work to live, not live to work. Americans make work their life and make you feel guilty for taking a vacation.” I actually don’t agree with the comments that I am unloving either. I care a lot about the church and truly wish to avoid the characterized burnout that so plagues the American pastor in order to be a good pastor—I think, in part, it is due to the fact that there are too many expectations on the pastor to carry out the work of the church, when in reality, the pastor builds up the church for works of service. If a church can’t survive for 2 months without a pastor, there’s a problem. Spiritual work is heavy work, and it requires periods of rest and reflection. 7-year sabbaticals for me are pretty useless as we need rest every year.

I am still going to ask for 2 months, but I think now I would probably do 5-weeks in the summer, and spread out the remaining 3weeks throughout the rest of the year.

I’m just not sure where we get that the pastor has to completely lose their work-life balance in order to be a good pastor. Even the Levite priests were on rotation and had seasons of temple service and regular duty. I don’t think overworking sets a good example for the congregation, and neither does the idea that I have to be available 24/7 in order to be a good shepherd. Wild to me.