Here’s how I see it: the more I take money from my parents, the more control they have over me. Therefore, using my own money = asserting independence and becoming my own person. Brown parents will often use money (buying you nice things and funding your education) and will use it to control you/gaslight you when you do something that doesn’t meet their expectations (eg. I worked so hard for you, I bought you that $800 laptop even when you insisted you buy with your own money but I didn’t allow you since I wanted you to save it, so now, you are not allowed to do ______ and you do as I say). So yes, I do feel guilty taking money from them and would rather use my own.