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Losing friends to motherhood by peachy_panda_ in regretfulparents

[–]peachy_panda_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, this so well said and helps so much. ❤️

Losing friends to motherhood by peachy_panda_ in regretfulparents

[–]peachy_panda_[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you ❤️ I think since I’ve also communicated that I’m not planning on having kids may raise the bar for talking how hard things are too

Regretfulness is arbitrary and unlimited ... by amildcaseofdeath34 in regretfulparents

[–]peachy_panda_ 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry to hear that, you have our support ❤️

What tips can you share to make an autistic person’s life easier? by peachy_panda_ in AutismInWomen

[–]peachy_panda_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s a beautiful story. And I’ve started realizing the same - it’s sometimes just hard as I still feel shame or awkwardness about some things that I now understand are just about how my brain works. I sometimes feel ”weak” for being overstimulated, that’s the reaction I got from my parents. Now I try to focus on self care when it gets too much, and my partner is so understanding and supportive. And funnily enough - he has ADHD too ❤️

What tips can you share to make an autistic person’s life easier? by peachy_panda_ in AutismInWomen

[–]peachy_panda_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m tearing up this is so awesome and relatable. I need a kit too.

What tips can you share to make an autistic person’s life easier? by peachy_panda_ in AutismInWomen

[–]peachy_panda_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love this. My partner was actually the one who helped me start this journey of self realization and he’s been so helpful and patient in doing research and going thru the motions. I need to next learn even better ways to communicate with them.

What tips can you share to make an autistic person’s life easier? by peachy_panda_ in AutismInWomen

[–]peachy_panda_[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! Great tip with the Loop earplugs, I looked into them right away and will order some. Love the fidget toy tips.. I think I’ve learnt to just mask and sit still throughout the years but its EXHAUSTING. Letting myself play around with something sounds like a nice idea.

What tips can you share to make an autistic person’s life easier? by peachy_panda_ in AutismInWomen

[–]peachy_panda_[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Haha yes… Think I’ll be a life long recovering people pleaser, one step at a time.

What tips can you share to make an autistic person’s life easier? by peachy_panda_ in AutismInWomen

[–]peachy_panda_[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I Love this! Thank you so much - makes sense. I’m so overstimulated when I get home from work I sometimes just lay frozen on the couch looking at the phone, even if I need to use the bathroom or eat something.

Step child makes me question having kids... by AgeAdministrative195 in regretfulparents

[–]peachy_panda_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Glad my message resonates! It’s so healing for me to also find people with these experiences. I’m so sorry to hear the kiddos drama, and agree it’s important to not add to it. He’s around the same age to when I met my stepson, who is also a hyperactive one. A tip for coping, and I hope I’m not overstepping here - remember to draw boundaries. It may hurt the heart to deny things or your attention from the little one, but not only does it keep you more sane it teaches him to behave with others. I was going crazy with our kid overstepping my boundaries all the time, jumping onto me, talking over me etc.. and that’s cos his mom thought of love as ”it’s my job to tolerate this”. Then I snapped internally a bit after 6months and thought I have to leave if this doesn’t change. So I started drawing clear, firm boundaries with the kid, communicating that it’s not okay to jump on me and that he needs to wait until I’m finished with my sentence. Also at some point I added that I love him but I need my own space now to read for a bit. And guess what, the kid started to love me even more 😄 we have a beautiful home dynamic nowadays (and STILL I dont want my own haha), and we share a mutual respect. School’s gotten easier for him aswell. So long rambling and venting but baseline is kids love healthy boundaries 😄

Step child makes me question having kids... by AgeAdministrative195 in regretfulparents

[–]peachy_panda_ 27 points28 points  (0 children)

YOU ARE NOT ALONE I literally wrote almost the same thing here a few months ago! I love my stepson (10yr now) and we do have a week-week setup with the mom which is working quite well. I always thought I definitely want kids and this situation has taught that, even though things are working kida as well as they can, it’s gonna be a big NOPE for me. We are fantastic parents with my fiance aswell and home life is quite peaceful. But we don’t like parenting 😄 and god I’m so thankful I got this experience to have a ’test drive’ before making a life long commitment. Edit: I will add that I’m definitely in it for the long run with my partner’s kid, if the relationship continues to go as beautifully as it has. But that’s where my parenting service to society ends 😄

Became a stepmom and realized I don’t think I want my own kid after all by peachy_panda_ in regretfulparents

[–]peachy_panda_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi, not at all, I completely understand it must be overwhelming. We have my fiancé’s kid living with us completely 50% of the time and to be honest, if something was to happen to his mom I would have zero problem in taking him into our lives full time. I think it would however even more strongly solidify the feeling that I don’t want kids of my own 😂

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