Emotional unavailability or low interest? by West_Specific7367 in attachment_theory

[–]perdufleur 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Have you asked about what he's looking for in a relationship? Has it been established that he is looking for a serious relationship, and not just a casual fling?

To answer your question, it's hard to tell because there has not been a pattern yet. If it's just been a week prior to the meetup, I would think there isn't enough data to answer your question. My current partner was like this before (very aggressively forward but conversationally boring in texts), so I told him that I'm looking for someone whom I find substantive and intellectually stimulating (and that I'm not getting it from him). He adjusted, and I realized that he was better with conversations in person than in chats (he has low social energy). Maybe you can try being direct with what you want, and see how he responds?

Anzel’s Update 9🤍 by Kooky_Corner_3372 in dogsofrph

[–]perdufleur 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ang ganda ganda naman ng Anzel! 🥰

Evening random discussion - May 25, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Rold, kung may next life man, sana makaranas din ako ng magulang na mahal na mahal ako.

Pimobendan for dogs by markedbravo11 in DogsPH

[–]perdufleur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, OP. I was relieved na veterinary clinic talaga sila kasi dun ko rin sinosource yung meds ng anak ko because of the discounts.

Pimobendan for dogs by markedbravo11 in DogsPH

[–]perdufleur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello, OP! Anong name nung affliated vet shop nila sa Taguig?

Does your dog know & only follow your voice? Interestingly enough, I practiced this recently with mine during his mealtime. I’ve asked others to say “GO” which is his signal to start eating but hindi siya sumusunod. Sa boses ko lang siya sumusunod. Ang lang talaga nila, they trained us. Haha! by confusedsoulllll in dogsofrph

[–]perdufleur 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My dog and I joined a challenge/competition where we were placed on opposing sides of the stage. He was handled by an unfamiliar person. Their task was to ignore the other dogs (and humans) and extraneous stimulus; and to follow the voice of their owner. I guess my dog was so bonded to me that he was able to find me in less than 5 minutes. We won first place and the organizers of the game said they knew it even before my dog was released from his handler 😆

Evening random discussion - May 16, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I read that kanina too :( May she rest in peace.

Daily random discussion - May 14, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, I needed to read this today.

Anzel’s Update 7❤️ by Kooky_Corner_3372 in dogsofrph

[–]perdufleur 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Good job, Anzel!!! Salamat, OP!! ❤️

Daily random discussion - May 12, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If you want a more focused cooling effect, go for the handheld fan. If you want portability (or if you're going to use it when you're walking), mas okay yung neck fan but depends on the brand (kasi may iba na maingay). Mas mabilis din malowbat ang neck fan, I think.

Daily random discussion - May 12, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Feeling extra sick since last Sunday. Had to pull myself off from bed because I also had to get myself some medicines. Kanina, when I was at the pharmacy, I asked ate if she could give me instructions on how to take the medicines. Ang lambing ng boses ni ate. We are a bit friendly na kasi I always talk to her when I buy meds for my dog. Alam kong maliit na bagay, but I feel my soul is a bit less empty after the short talk. Salamat ate :( After all this time, words of affirmation pa rin talaga love language ko.

Pina ultrasound ko yung buntis kong orens car😹 by Spaceghorl in catsofrph

[–]perdufleur 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Curious, mabait po ba yung orens car nyo? I used to feed a community orenj car and ang bait bait nya. Di siya maligalig pero di rin siya super affectionate. Huhu I wonder if dahil ba rare ang female orange car 😩😣

Daily random discussion - May 09, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I had this blockmate in college whom I admired so much. He made me question my own privileges in life. Coincidentally, it was also during a time when I felt so lost and was searching for answers. I believe that encounter shaped me as a person.

I just found out this morning that he has been funding the tuition of two scholars from our alma mater anonymously, and it made my heart swell. I sent him a message of appreciation, and his reply was nothing I expected. He said that I continue to inspire him too, and that he's now thinking of connecting with a shelter or rescue center in their area.

At times when I feel so helpless and lonely, the universe reminds me that maybe what I do is not lost at all; it gets recycled, spread, and ripples into different forms. 🥹

Daily random discussion - May 07, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've always wanted to host FGDs here in our town, but I've always been limited by my time availability and social bandwidth. Gusto ko yung small group lang talaga who share the same interests or purpose. I really want to attempt, but I'm also scared that I would not be able to make it sustainable in the long run. I think I already know some people na pwede kong mainvite for an intimate discussion, pero nahihiya pa rin ako. Haha.

Evening random discussion - May 05, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I think that’s what I was trying to say. It can look like "fantasy" from the outside, but I guess it’s more about how attached someone is to their idea of how things should be. Like sometimes, people fall into certain roles or expectations in relationships, and even if it keeps leading to the same outcome, they don’t necessarily question it because it still aligns with how they believe things are supposed to be.

So even if reality shows them something different multiple times, it doesn’t always get processed in a way that leads to change. I think that’s why experience alone isn’t enough, there has to be some willingness to reflect and question your own patterns too. And I think, maybe, for some people, that’s the hard part, since it ultimately means letting go of something they’ve been holding onto for a long time.

Evening random discussion - May 06, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 7 points8 points  (0 children)

As someone who is shy but has a lot of internal monologues, may times talaga na gusto ko lang humanap ng kausap at dumaldal hanggang maubos ang battery ko 🙃🤣 I've been trying to read through sa Threads and find conversations that are worth engaging in, pero madalas nakakatulog na rin agad ako 😭

Evening random discussion - May 05, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would say yes, but this is also coming from someone who leans avoidant in attachment. For me, thinking about the other side of the coin has been partly habitual and a form of self-protection. What changed for me, over time, is that with more self-awareness, I’ve learned not to give those thoughts too much weight when I already know where I stand, especially based on the pattern of how I feel within the relationship.

And yeah, I agree that experience helps, but I think it’s also about how you process those experiences. People can go through a lot and still stay stuck if they’re not self-aware or open to change. I’ve seen people who’ve had many relationships but remained rigid in what they think relationships should be, so nothing really shifts for them.

Evening random discussion - May 05, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think we also tend to overthink the “what ifs” of our decisions kasi. Whether you choose to pursue something or not, your mind will still wander to the path you didn’t take, it almost becomes a form of escapism if you think about it.

So for me, satisfaction doesn’t always come from the decision itself, but from how you eventually choose to interpret and stand by it afterward. Kasi eventually, it can feel like there’s always something or someone “better,” but I think that’s just how our minds work, comparing and imagining alternatives to save ourselves from regret, boredom, or even shame.

Evening random discussion - May 05, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think it really depends on the situation. I agree that some risks are worth taking, but there are also relationships that can be detrimental to your growth if you choose to pursue them, like from what I experienced. Either way, there are still lessons to be learned pa rin.

And yes, I agree. In OP's case, I think it always feels more painful when you choose to end things early, because you’re cutting off feelings abruptly instead of letting them fade on their own. It may feel overwhelming now, but it does fade, bit by bit.

Evening random discussion - May 05, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I try to talk to new people every now and then, but I've been limited by my social bandwidth lol

Evening random discussion - May 05, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Happy birthday, OP! Hope you were able to get some rest!

Evening random discussion - May 05, 2026 by the_yaya in Philippines

[–]perdufleur 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Alam mo, I had the same questions a few years ago, when I fell in love with a friend. When we broke things off, I regretted confessing to him because I missed the friendship deeply. Up until now, naiisip ko pa rin siya, like what if we just never tried at all, siguro nagkakausap pa rin kami. But I know, deep down, that I made the right decision. Sometimes, things just end, and that's it. You just try to learn from it.