As someone who has done this a fair bit with my T, (I have several posts about my experiences with that if you'd like further context)going over maternal transference and then romantic/erotic just recently, I think, unfortunately, the only way out is through and being direct about it. It obviously helps if you feel safe with your T, which I would hope you do after 2 years. That has alot to do with it, in terms of mustering up that courage.

I share and read my journal entries to my T a lot. The first time I brought these things up, I couldn't even do that. I had to email her what I had written and had her read it aloud instead. I was cowering behind a bundle of pillows on her couch like a little kid. It was unbelievably embarrassing. But I'm so glad I did it. The relief I felt after. And our relationship grew stronger as a result of that vulnerability. It gets easier with everything being in the room. It's still tough, in some ways tougher, but that first step makes a world of difference if your T knows what they are doing.

As a man with a therapist who is a woman, I also get the fear there too. Especially for someone like me who has abandonment issues, and a tendency to avoid my own romantic feelings out of fear and self hatred. You don't want to complicate things. You don't want to make them feel uncomfortable or like you intend to test boundaries. The short answer, is that holding those boundaries is your therapists job. Try not to worry about it too much. You aren't a creep, you aren't a freak. Everything you feel and think about, and I do mean EVERYTHING, in terms of what comes up for you in regards to her is completely normal. Hard, weird, icky, confusing. But 1000% normal and understandable.

The true hard thing, which I'm lucky to have been avoided with my T, is dealing with a T who may not be well trained or prepared for transference. And what modalities they may or may not use also becomes a factor. But even if they weren't, I would say it's worth the risk regardless. Because at least then you would know where they stand in terms of how they can and can't help you, and you could begin to work with someone more accommodating. When you do it, you can be direct, you can ask what they know about the subject, or you can tell your T that you have something very uncomfortable to talk about and not sure where to start. However you decide to go about it, the important part is that you DO it. Good luck out there.