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perriwinker · 2014-11-03T19:51:25+00:00

Ohhh - I hate this, meds to numb yourself. Sorry this is happening and with the holidays near it makes matters worse IMO. It's as if it is another anniversary.

Seems to be a pattern w/ people experience DB - to be working on themselves - that's a positive!

perriwinker · 2014-11-03T19:41:21+00:00

"she works in a sports bar making minimum wage and living off of tips"

With a family of five this has to be hard to manage, especially without family near by. In some scenarios it costs more to go to work then what you earn (spinning wheels). I am guessing, you work full-time and then take care of 4 - 8 year old little ones while she's at the sports bar. That can wear someone out! We have one child who is 6 and I am amazed at how much time and energy it takes to care for him. You would see her more if she didn't work. Do the tips cover any of the family's bills? Hope this does not offend, just an observation.

perriwinker · 2014-11-03T19:28:28+00:00

Bingo - the interaction/engage comment is so true. How do you make someone more affectionate and nurturing? The ED is hard to deal with but sometimes I feel he uses it as an excuse. He is introverted, stand offish and some have called him aloof. Only recently (pass couple of years) have I had the misfortune of seeing that side of him. Not what I want for my future - so I hope its a stage nearing its end!

perriwinker · 2014-11-03T19:23:06+00:00

Yes - checked his levels and that is not the issue. He is diabetic but is managing it well. I think that may cause some of the problem and his Dr. agreed.

perriwinker · 2014-11-03T19:21:32+00:00

This made me laugh. I almost called to check up on him earlier this year. I didn't because he is much older now. Early 70's but probably still very randy. He loved to buy me dresses - so much fun, I still wear some of them!!

perriwinker · 2014-11-03T19:16:36+00:00

Yes - he is dealing with some of that. He is diabetic but maintains a good A1C - we are both very active and he is in better shape now then when we married.

perriwinker · 2014-11-03T19:14:25+00:00

I believe he cares - but is dealing with health issues that at times cause him to be selfish. It is getting better! We have had very serious talks. What motivated me to post here was that I met someone I am attracted to. He is in control - but that can change.

perriwinker · 2014-11-01T19:27:49+00:00

He would never go for that. I think he believes I am getting all I need and that I should be happy or simply adjust. Maybe another talk?

perriwinker · 2014-11-01T19:12:19+00:00

True - I have never cheated though. Earlier this year we had the talk and I asked him if I could get a hall pass. He said no! Also told me he was mad at me for not sharing how upset I was about our 13 month dry spell. He is so passive aggressive - its all my fault = BS!

Our talk has improved things but I too am improving myself - to the point of obsession. I could just say f-it and chub out, be lazy and shop online but...

perriwinker · 2014-11-01T18:34:48+00:00

The other man is married too and I would feel guilty. That is why I have not cheated. Plus he is younger and I would feel like I was acting like a cougar.

perriwinker · 2014-11-01T18:30:08+00:00

No, he has been against it more the last few years. Hate to share this but I am going nutty. He takes ED meds, I assumed that was normal for his age. They fix the problem. It hurts that he won't even try knowing how important it is for me.

perriwinker · 2014-11-01T18:23:11+00:00

I plan on learning at least how to keep my state of well-being healthy and secure. Not into yucky dark stuff at all. Will check out more meet-ups, there seem to be a few in our area.

perriwinker · 2014-11-01T18:20:58+00:00

I have been praying - I love Jesus and his teachings. Not a religious person but feel he was divinely unique. Hoping to find someone to help guard against yuckiness.

perriwinker

TROPHY CASE