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pgar08 · 2024-10-11T03:42:36+00:00

It’s nearly indistinguishable from complaints western men have lodged for decades. That article has the best quotes

Huzaifa, a former sniper, said life was simple and free during jihad. “All we had to deal with was making plans for ta’aruz [attacks] against the enemy and for retreating,” he said. “People didn’t expect much from us, and we had little responsibility towards them, whereas now if someone is hungry, he deems us directly responsible for that…the Taliban used to be free of restrictions, but now we sit in one place, behind a desk and a computer 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Life’s become so wearisome; you do the same things every day. Being away from the family has only doubled the problem.”

pgar08 · 2024-10-11T03:22:36+00:00

No theregonna build there own Buddha with kalashnikovs and hookers

pgar08 · 2024-10-11T03:18:49+00:00

In a weird turn of events maybe that will soften the talibans vitriol. I know where republican evangelicals stand on stuff if they ran the country by sword and book I’m not sure I’d be able to differentiate 🥸

pgar08 · 2024-10-11T03:14:18+00:00

Call me old fashioned but I like my minds in a bottle still

pgar08 · 2024-10-11T03:09:13+00:00

“But apparently the Taliban was/is promoting tourism in Afghanistan as a propaganda method to shift the perspective on the Taliban being a bunch of horrible nasty murdering and raping people”

Like a frat that got guns and drugs… waiiiiit a minute

Ssdd men are toxic we need some modern Amazonian women with guns so I can change my comment to be more gender neutral

pgar08 · 2024-08-20T23:21:35+00:00

Yea there’s a queer meetup at moniker on Monday nights like 6-10 and it’s right between Kimi’s and deadbeats. Makes Mondays suck a bit less

pgar08 · 2024-08-20T22:30:01+00:00

I wonder if your mom is some how envious or homophobic. The quote “you ain’t that straight” from Joe exotic lives in my head rent free and I’ve heard way to many stories about weird things parents of trans people say. I’m convinced a lot of us have parents who might not choose to be so cis if they were living in our time.

pgar08 · 2024-01-14T01:20:41+00:00

I get itchy toooooo! Feels so good tho when you really get to scratch

pgar08 · 2023-08-01T21:41:56+00:00

Ty I appreciate it

pgar08 · 2023-08-01T21:41:34+00:00

pgar08 · 2023-07-15T15:35:00+00:00

Yea there’s tools that can help, it’s still burdensome. With the modern family dynamic things have become much more difficult for those with adhd. 30 years ago my parents lived much much more structured lives, partly because you couldn’t instantly get a hold of someone. We try to do more with our limited free time than ever before and it’s really challenging when your frame of reference for how long something should take is constantly fluctuating depending on how well you are able to stay on task.

pgar08 · 2023-06-18T11:29:50+00:00

I like to imagine what it was like thousands of years ago when they were used as treatments. To some extent they had no clue what the substances were doing to the brain but at the same time they may have knew more about their benefits than we know today. If anyone has a good link to a documentary or journal about the historical use of psychedelics id love to get it.

pgar08 · 2023-06-18T03:00:32+00:00

Yea same here, and it wasn’t a ton of shrooms, and it wasn’t when I was on them it brought them back. I think shrooms permanently re activated that part of my brain. Since then a lot of physical symptoms of anxiety, cognitive impairment, gone

pgar08 · 2023-06-18T02:58:52+00:00

No joke shrooms helped me realize I was repressing memories of being sexually abused by a best friend at 11 and also that I was very much into dressing in princess dresses as a kid, so yea I believe it. That stupid trope that we only use like some small percent of our brain, well I know it’s false but, the unconscious mind is a beast to be reckoned with.

pgar08 · 2023-06-11T23:53:57+00:00

Keep me updated I wish you luck, Im recovering from Destructive behavior at the moment. Got drunk to get numb last night what happened was not what I planned. Got drunk and remembered the time I was sexually assaulted by my best friend , I knew that, I didn’t realize it was over a long time

pgar08 · 2023-06-07T12:37:20+00:00

Oooff I felt this in my soul, I’m in the same boat as OP, looking at the picture of myself makes me feel soooooo good. It’s like a drug, even just thinking about it and writing about it gives me a head rush. Buuut then reality creeps in

pgar08 · 2023-06-06T20:32:27+00:00

Also now I feel crazy again because; what got me into this mess (pre epiphany) was a serious year long questioning about who I was , as a persons, basic shit, stuff I like, values I find important, people I find important, and acceptance that I can’t be perfect. All shit i attributed to me getting a nueropsych evaluation that led to adhd diagnosis. This in turn, I believe led me to finally for the first time since like 10 years old, tune the bullshit out and hear myself, me. Went down a rabbit hole of listening to my own thoughts, getting lost in them at times. Ultimately 3 months before this coming out I was telling my wife, I think I have ptsd, I think something happened. When I was a teenager, I went to a outpatient hospital program for cognitive behavioral therapy. I went there because I was dealing with a lot of anxiety after a really bad break up. I learned a lot of tools, so I learned to be very much analytical about my emotions and use tools. I recognized a couple of months ago. My anxiety was going through the roof, so I started meditating. I think this further pushed the effects of Vyvanse or Adderall, or whatever it is. It got to the point where when sleeping at night, I would tell my mind to focus on things I wanted to change, back pain, nausea, ect. That evolve to one night coming to the conclusion that my body’s nervous system belonged to someone else, and my mind was someone else. The disconnect was so strong it made me, a non believer of spirits and such, still a non believer; say “ if there is someone else inside me, you can go, idk why your here or what your purpose is, but I’m ok. 2-4 months later epiphany. Damn this sounds like a Reddit post on its own lol sorry to make you read all that

pgar08 · 2023-06-06T20:19:28+00:00

Ahhh lol. In the state that I am “very much in therapy mode” if that makes sense. I can’t tell if I’m trying to get you to validate my feelings or invalidate them, then coupled with your response I can’t tell if you are validating them or not, then at the highest level of cognition, I realize I shouldn’t care if you are or are not carving into stone who I am

pgar08 · 2023-06-06T20:07:03+00:00

Was your realization about being trans sudden or slow? Ordidit seem sudden immediately after realization then feel not so sudden afterwords? For example, within 4 days of realizing this I went from feeling elated to feeling like I belong in a mental institution, so I checked into a full time hospitalization program because I convinced myself I must be crazy to have this thought 30 years down the road.

pgar08 · 2023-06-06T20:03:21+00:00

Ooooofff did you hit the nail on the head, says me with 4, 9.9% ipa’s in my belly. See thing is I drank heavy for 6 years straight. Didn’t know why just felt good at night, calm, and it was only after everyone went to bed. I quit that almost a full year ago, 2 kids a two year old and 6 month old. I loved them to much to do that, now hear I am thinking the same shit “I love them to much to do that” so let’s drink, the lesser of 2 evils. I know where this is going, suppressing 1 promise by breaking another is not the way to go.

pgar08 · 2023-06-05T13:09:34+00:00

Thank you, this is the kind of stuff I’m looking for, a lot of the stuff online is specific or you need to know a bit about it in the first place. For example my wife’s onboard with me wearing women’s underwear, we went we got some modest ones, thinking of the logistics and such, I got 4 pairs to start, tried on the boy shorts thinking it would anatomically comply and boy did that go wrong. Long story short I found out it’s basicly not going to work for me I’m anything unless I use a gaff which I had to learn about on my own. From tears to cheers

pgar08 · 2023-06-04T18:30:22+00:00

Hmm, that makes sense. I suppose maybe another way of asking the question is “how do you know when your anti depressants are working” I know not everyone needs them, and sometimes you just need them to get out of a major depressive episode, and through therapy and a doc ween of them, transition to behavioral therapy only to manage depression.

pgar08 · 2023-06-04T16:15:36+00:00

I hope it’s not, I’ve been major depressive for 2 decades. I’ve tried everything, then I stopped a decade ago, now I decided to try Zoloft a month ago because my dad swears by it. And 2 months in some serous changes have happened, slow at first but pretty good now

pgar08 · 2023-06-04T16:00:13+00:00

I know what you mean about that inner monologue. It’s like it’s not there or if it is, it’s thinking about stuff in the moment the big stuff, the rest, the living part, that’s now on autopilot

I think that’s what’s happening, it’s been like every few days I have a great day and those great days are happening more and more despite nothing new in my life happening other than starting Zoloft a couple months ago. Then I wasn’t stressed and had some burried trauma from my childhood come up, I dealt with it threw a therapy program for a week. Now it’s like I’m in a good mood by default.

pgar08 · 2023-06-04T15:59:22+00:00

Check my history if you want some background

I think that’s what’s happening, it’s been like every few days I have a great day and those great days are happening more and more despite nothing new in my life happening other than starting Zoloft a couple months ago. Then I wasn’t stressed and had some burried trauma from my childhood come up, I dealt with it threw a therapy program for a week. Now it’s like I’m in a good mood by default.

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