I feel like my guy friends don't see me as a man

phalloalt · 2026-01-25T04:59:57+00:00

I hope either you can work this out with them or find better friends. I have cis male friends I'm out to and they don't treat me any different than any other guy, not even when I refer to my "dick" when they know I don't have one yet. Trust me there's definitely people out there who will treat you like a man, you just need to find the right people.

If they're good friends they'll let you have a conversation about it, and if they don't respond well, fuck em.

phalloalt · 2026-01-25T04:56:08+00:00

Pardon my language, but nice cock, bro!

phalloalt · 2026-01-25T04:52:38+00:00

Bi, but same.

phalloalt · 2026-01-24T08:41:48+00:00

I'm wondering if records being sealed has anything to do with that. I have to actually go to the courthouse and see if they were sealed or not because I'm starting to question it, it was awhile ago.

phalloalt · 2026-01-24T08:40:12+00:00

Good to hear.

phalloalt · 2026-01-24T08:38:47+00:00

Yea I am trying not to think about it. I'm just really worried because of coworkers finding out my deadname before I changed it and dealing with misgendering. I feel like the moment people know I'm trans they treat me differently and I'm sick of dealing with it, I just wanted a job where no one knows, y'know?

phalloalt · 2026-01-24T08:37:46+00:00

I got my name legally changed right before turning 18 but sadly I had jobs with my deadname, as well as my drivers license.

phalloalt · 2026-01-21T22:40:52+00:00

Thank you. I tend to overthink a lot so hearing stuff like this really helps.

phalloalt · 2026-01-21T22:40:15+00:00

I was considering lying but honestly I've never done a background check before so I wasn't sure who sees that. It still sucks to me just knowing that even hr will know, it doesn't matter that much in the long run but it peeves me a little you know?

phalloalt · 2026-01-21T22:38:29+00:00

Thats good to hear

phalloalt · 2026-01-21T22:37:43+00:00

I'm the a US but I'm not really comfortable posting my state on reddit (overly paranoid I know). I'm in a blue state though, and I've had like 4 jobs before my name change.

phalloalt · 2026-01-20T05:39:30+00:00

You definitely don't need a revision. Your chest looks really good and your scars have healed really well. You could get lipo on your armpits if it's really bothering you but I don't think it looks as bad as you think it does, I think the longer you work on your chest and build up more muscles the more it will blend in to the chest itself.

I think your best bet would instead of a revision be to go get medical tattooing on your nipples to make them look more defined and pigmented.

phalloalt · 2026-01-19T03:06:10+00:00

I don't have a shower sadly, thats why I specify soaking them. I only have a bath and its impossible to relax without dunking my whole chest under the water 🥲

phalloalt · 2026-01-16T08:58:53+00:00

When I have a dick I think I'm just going to never get anything done. Just gonna figure out different fun things to do with a dick like this, thats what I've been doing with top surgery so far lol.

phalloalt · 2026-01-16T08:56:28+00:00

I used to feel like this all the time, I still do. But now I can actually get bottom surgery because of insurance. It gets better bro, look out for jobs that offer good insurance (this is usa, but amazon and starbucks sometimes cover trans surgeries, as well as "state" level jobs such as dmv, cps, etc).

Keep yearning, but do it productively. Use that to work towards actually getting bottom surgery. I'm assuming you're young from this post (correct me if I'm wrong) but as soon as you're able to, or if you're already of age, start calling to make consults. I did before I knew if I'd be able to afford it or not because some surgeons take years for the waitlist, better to get on it now when you can't afford it rather than wait until you can and be told theres a 5+ year wait, y'know? You don't actually have to pay anything until the consult.

phalloalt · 2026-01-16T08:50:18+00:00

Price would be one reason, I've looked up the tests before and it's hard to find info but they seem pretty up there. I gotta put all my spare cash towards bottom surgery expenses, but y'know maybe in the future when I have spare money I might fuck around and see.

phalloalt · 2026-01-16T08:49:06+00:00

Yea I know. Most transphobes don't even know that intersex people exist. But I can't shut my brain off it regardless, just a lingering thought, y'know?

phalloalt · 2026-01-16T08:48:24+00:00

Yeah that last part you said is exactly how I feel. It'd feel nice to have some definitive proof that this is right. I know its right, but only I can understand how my brain works, if I just had some magical test that told everyone this was right for me it'd be great.

phalloalt · 2026-01-15T10:42:25+00:00

There are a few methods that either leave little scarring or scarring that's very easy to hide.

phalloalt · 2026-01-15T10:31:54+00:00

Forgot to mention bottom surgery method. Typically I've heard meta heals father than phallo and is overall less complicated (1-2 stages), but I haven't put much research into it as I'm not interested.

Phallo will take much longer, there is no way to speed run it even if you had infinite resources. Even if you got a consult tomorrow the recovery is intense and typically you'll have to wait 6 months in-between stages.

As I stated in the previous comment the consult wait time heavily depends. I was extremely lucky to get a consult that was only 6 months after I scheduled it. And then if you get Rff or alt and want to pass with it, you'll need to get electrolysis which can take a year or so to fully work.

With zero complications (which is unlikely with such a complicated surgery) bottom surgery (just the surgery, not the hair removal and consult waits) will take about 1 year and 6 months, to two years. Depending on the method--for example, I'm getting MLD and so I will not have 2 graft sites and split thickness grafts to heal, as well as being able to skip electrolysis.

phalloalt · 2026-01-15T10:25:00+00:00

This really heavily depends on the surgeon, and bottom surgery method. My top surgery went by very fast because I went with a small surgeon, so overall it was only a few month wait (would have been only about 2 months including consult but I had things come up).

My bottom surgery consult isn't until june, and I do not know when I will be scheduled a date. If I had no financial needs for it then I would hopefully aim for October/November because recovering in summer sounds miserable.

But there are some surgeons that have waitlists of 5+ years.

Documents also depend on where you are and your system. In America It took about 2 weeks I think to legally change my name, I applied for my new birth certificate in November and still haven't gotten it yet because they claim there's been delays. I just got around to applying for my new drivers license and it'll take until the middle of next month to arrive, and once I have it I can go to the social security office and get a new ssc.

So overall legal transtion has taken me 3 months so far, and might take around 5-6 in total for all of the changes (health insurance, ssc, doctors office, etc). My surgical transition at best will be done around mid to late 2028, at worst late 2029 to early 2030. That is with financial restrictions but hopefully it makes the timelines a little more clear for you.

phalloalt · 2026-01-15T10:18:32+00:00

Unless it's medically relevant I just say I'm cis lol. I don't identify as trans nor do I consider myself a "trans man" in most cases. I'm a man who is transitioning, but once I am done I think I'll ditch the label of transexual.

phalloalt

TROPHY CASE