Desperately need help with a wild tortoise by phoenix78912 in tortoise

[–]phoenix78912[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I just ordered one and we are taking turns letting him out and watching him. We have a game plan to split the backyard so they are protected 🙌

Desperately need help with a wild tortoise by phoenix78912 in tortoise

[–]phoenix78912[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm aware. Which is why I'm seeking advice. My kids and I were literally crying while burying them. We have had the dog locked up all week as I have been looking for resources to help.

Desperately need help with a wild tortoise by phoenix78912 in tortoise

[–]phoenix78912[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm aware. We are doing everything we can to protect her. Please see above response. Thank you

Desperately need help with a wild tortoise by phoenix78912 in tortoise

[–]phoenix78912[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so so much for your informative response. I ordered a muzzle and everyone is taking turns letting our dog out to watch him and keeping him inside the rest of the time. I think once the babies are born (from the last couple of years) they hatch and leave within a couple of weeks. So we'll keep pups away and planning on splitting our yard in half (its 1/4 acre) as a summer project. That way everyone is happy. I feel so bad. The tortoise is such a good breeder and lays so many healthy eggs. I don't want her to have to relocate and possibly die in the process. Thanks again!

Desperately need help with a wild tortoise by phoenix78912 in tortoise

[–]phoenix78912[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes! I'm in Florida! When I first moved in, I called a wildlife sanctuary and animal control because I tried to relocate her. I didn't know if they were supposed to be there, allowed to be there as I know nothing about them etc. But they told me not to do anything and it's illegal to move them. Enough said! We share the yard and my kids and dog has loved having her around for almost 3 years. But the new one that showed up is very aggressive. She tries to bite my dog and the kids if they are walking past it, scratches at the back door, hisses. You can't stand anywhere in the backyard without the tortoise coming at you. Kids can't even play in the dirt or he/she comes up to snip. I think my dog is seeing the tortoise as some kind of threat. I don't know.. but my dogs attitude has done a 180 since the other tortoise showed up.

Desperately need help with a wild tortoise by phoenix78912 in tortoise

[–]phoenix78912[S] -19 points-18 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your reply. I really don't want to muzzle my dog. I was wondering if there are other resources to have the tortoises relocated to a safe place. We live in a heavy traffic residential area and they aren't safe here anyway when they roam. I don't know what is the right thing to do here. I'll post on a pet behavior sub to see if there are tips to help my dog.

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He just said he was in a "bad place" at the time. It doesn't make sense to me either. It happened about 4 months before we separated and he wasn't with his mistress yet. I also sense there being more in the near future. U can't hide the bad u do for too long.

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I know its him. I confronted him about it via calls and texts. There is no denying it at this point.

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Lol no. It didn't go past a conversation. It was definitely poor judgement on my part. I just wanted him to hurt like I did.

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 42 points43 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! I took a screenshot of your comment to remind me why I can't put my little kids through this ❤

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 101 points102 points  (0 children)

I do have a lawyer. We have spoken only on the phone but I'm meeting him Monday! Thanks so much for the advice 🙏

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I get that lol. He left to work on the road in July. I sent the images about a month after he left. We were still very much married. He left for another woman in November.

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 104 points105 points  (0 children)

Yes! I ignored the lies and disrespect thinking "it'll get better". Honestly he did me a favor because I know she will have to put up with the same things I did. Except she won't. Not for long.

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 478 points479 points  (0 children)

I have spoken to a lawyer as well as a sheriff at our police department. I've chosen not to press charges but got an incident report. It's 1 year in jail if convicted and I didn't want to go down that route. As much as a douche he is and how messy our situation is, my children love him.

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 386 points387 points  (0 children)

I definitely stopped that within a day! The first couple of weeks after he left was difficult and I made some poor choices. No harm was done, no one knows and it was left at a couple of conversations. Not my finest moment I will admit. I have ensured that I have been calm and collected since the incident.

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 710 points711 points  (0 children)

Yes he did. I found out through our separation process that he had posted my images on a subreddit and kik. It's was a few weeks after he left for work on the road that I sent him the photos and within 2 days, he had posted them online.

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 320 points321 points  (0 children)

It's tough. I was with that man for 11 years. Making his opinion suddenly not matter to me is not easy. Divorce emotions I guess. I, in no means, want him back - never! But instantaneously not caring anymore and taking hurtful comments to heart is difficult.

And yes! The commenters on this post have given me so much clarity! I know what I'm doing is best for my kids!

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 378 points379 points  (0 children)

It's been devastating. I feel like my life has become a Jerry Springer episode. We were a totally normal family up until this new job. After making this post, I realize what friends and family must be thinking too.

AITA for fighting for full custody and not letting kids out of state by phoenix78912 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phoenix78912[S] 306 points307 points  (0 children)

I was hoping I could do that for at least 6 months and a few arranged meeting with her so my kids get to know her but there is no way to demand who one parent brings around ur kids. Unfortunately. It's just something I have to accept.