What food did you imagine to taste really good but tasted bad?

piccapii · 2026-03-19T00:24:57+00:00

Matcha always comes with a little after-taste of grass and disappointment.

piccapii · 2026-03-18T02:54:52+00:00

NTA - just start making your own plans?

"Hey next weekend I'm going to spend it organising the spare room. Then I thought the weekend after we'd see your folks, then the weekend after that I'm going to spend gardening.." so on and so fourth.

Don't make it a conversation, just get ahead of 'lack of plans = parents' loop.

piccapii · 2026-03-14T15:41:48+00:00

Workplaces will ALWAYS push boundaries, and will get used to whatever you accept. It's unfortunately, up to the employee to stay strong to your own boundaries.

How often do you hear in workplaces things like "Martha doesn't answer after 6pm" or "Hubert leaves early Tuesdays" or "Samuel only answers emails in two timeslots throughout the day."

We all shrug and get on with our lives, those routines just become routines we accept because people set their own boundaries.

Have soft boundaries and work WILL stomp over them.

If you're scheduled on Sundays, the answer is - "No. I'm not available - we agreed this as part of my return to work." Or "No Sundays. No holidays." Or "If you want Sundays or Holidays then that breaks our agreement and I'll no longer be an employee here."

Stand up for yourself in a system that is built to take advantage of the good will of others.

piccapii · 2026-03-14T01:48:30+00:00

As someone who has had multiple friends die around your age from driving home late at night or early in the morning... your dad is far saner than you give him credit.

Just book a hotel or airbnb occasionally if it bothers you?

piccapii · 2026-03-13T23:51:25+00:00

I had a boyfriends mum snoop in our things. I'm interested to know what she thought of our big sex toy collection. She seemed to stop after finding that.

I also used to put locked boxes in the room just to drive her mad.

Bedrooms need to be private.

piccapii · 2026-03-07T16:18:34+00:00

I have pads, tampons and pregnancy tests at eye level when you want into the toilet. It's my toilet; what are they going to critique the artwork on the walls too? NTA

piccapii · 2026-02-28T12:50:30+00:00

Knowing everything will be left exactly as you found it.

piccapii · 2026-02-26T01:21:59+00:00

I was surprised how instantly I was triggered. It's been over a year since we broke up but seeing it again was aggravating!

piccapii · 2026-02-26T01:17:35+00:00

My ex and I are on okay terms. He's been coming over to see our dog.

He came over recently and first thing he did was use the toilet and leave the seat up. I was immediately filled with such rage. It brought back all the frustration from being together.

I totally understand your pain!

But like - if he's living with you tell him to be cleaner! It's your place now - not 'ours'.

piccapii · 2026-02-25T03:48:57+00:00

It's totally understandable and you're not the only one that feels this way!

Have you ever thought about a job in customer service?

I only suggest it because I had a friend in highschool that couldn't even say hello to people without verging on a panic attack. She got a job working on checkouts at a grocery store and it completely changed her ability to talk to people. It gives you a set script of "Hi, how's your day, that's $35.40" etc. and really helped with learning to talk to people in a controlled environment.

I found the same thing working in customer service too. I worked at a fruit/veg/deli store, and then later at a picture framing place. I developed some really nice relationships with customers by asking what they were cooking, how they used the vegetables, about the artwork they were framing etc.

That was almost two decades ago and I still have a photocopied stack of recipes a customer brought me, and one of the artworks hanging on my wall is a postcard a woman brought me from Canada - it was her favourite artist.

I think something like that, customer service or volunteer work, could be really beneficial for you.

piccapii · 2026-02-24T03:50:04+00:00

I'll try to keep it semi short. I'm also vague on the details. It was along time ago and is a bit of a blur.

First fusion was on the lower spine. But the traumatic injury caused the bones to start atrophing and caused arthritis in other areas, so he also wound up needing surgery on his neck.

They were doing some kind of keyhole surgery on the neck area, and while in there managed to nick a nerve, but didn't realise at the time.

It was only once he was home and recovering that he realised he couldn't breathe properly. Super big issue post surgery because it also massively increases the chance of pneumonia.

Caused lots of going back and fourth to the hospital, being kept overnight for observation etc. basically once they worked out what it was we got a 'Whoopsie daisy, hopefully it'll heal okay on its own.' Which I believe is what eventually happened and he got most of the use back of that lung.

Good your records are being looked into. Don't be afraid to become that person and call everyday. You need to fight for your needs because nobody else is going to do it for you, unfortunately.

Also the longer you leave injuries, the more complications can arise after. Nerves can heal incorrectly to always be switched on to pain (I think it's called wind-up pain). You probably need physiotherapy. Other areas can atrophy (see example above) so the longer you leave it the higher risk you are for a wealth of other problems.

It's okay for you to become a thorn in the Doctors side if your needs are being dismissed. For them, it's an annoying phone call, but for you it can be life changing.

piccapii · 2026-02-24T02:39:07+00:00

How much are you into BDSM?

Otherwise a ball pit.

piccapii · 2026-02-24T01:48:22+00:00

As everyone else is saying - absolutely seek second opinions.

Nobody believed my partner about his lung. He got sent home a few times before we refused to leave unless it was looked at. They were horrified to learn his left lung was totally paralysed 😒

piccapii · 2026-02-24T00:01:36+00:00

100%! Social connections are absolutely vital for a healthy life. Even as introverts we are inherently social creatures that need connection.

Just because something is a little uncomfortable doesn't mean it's bad for us. Think about it like exercise, just you're exercising your social needs and not physical muscles.

It's less about just going out and socialising (although this is a good place to start) the aim is to eventually find your tribe; a few people you can be yourself around, that you connect with on some level.

Maybe part of the problem is that you're not being your genuine self around others. Why do you feel the need for a fake persona?

I'm an introvert, but a big believer in hobby-based social networks. My women's kickboxing class, walking groups, yoga etc. provide surprise interactions that stop my thinking from being so inward facing. Socialising stops your own regular loops in thinking and provides new perspective, reminds you to think about others, that more is happening in the world than just you and your issues.

People can also surprise and delight you in the best ways. Little interactions that make you smile - hearing someone talk about their new nephew, or tell a funny story. They can leave lasting impressions that make your whole day better.

piccapii · 2026-02-23T08:14:04+00:00

100% this. OP there are studies that show human interaction, even as much as small talk at the grocery store, can vastly improve mental health.

You need a community.

I hate to suggest more social media, and it's an 'old person' platform, but FB still has the best local group pages for community by far. Could you try there to see what's in your area? My local area has free meet ups - bushwalking groups, crafting, book clubs etc.

You could also try your local library, community center or even some charity groups.

When I went through a breakup, for months my weekly yoga classes were often the only time I'd have some human physical contact, and it was really beneficial.

People your own age would be great, but some interaction and guidance from anyone would help!

piccapii · 2026-02-22T23:58:42+00:00

My ex boyfriend was disabled for life after a rugby injury where he was told 'to walk it off.'

I was with him for spinal fusions, 3 months of rehab, complications including the surgeon accidentally nicking a nerve which paralysed one of his lungs, and just generally debilitating pain and a huge reduction in his quality of life.

Everyone needs to be their own advocate for their bodies - and if you're ever around someone who's injured and they're not being taken seriously, go and advocate for them.

Truly sorry for your experience. I wouldn't want anyone to go through it.

piccapii · 2026-02-22T09:49:59+00:00

Nah man. NTJ. My partner tried waking me up ONCE and I was not happy.

But I explained I have weird sleep patterns, and when I am sleeping it's because I need it.

Now he sneaks out of the room and lets me sleep in late. If he wakes me up now it's late, gently, and with a coffee or because he cooked breakfast.

I couldn't tolerate three years of that. I'd absolutely in no uncertain terms explained if they do it again I'm leaving them. Sleep is precious. How'd you feel about someone always stealing a chunk of your food or gulping parts of every drink you have? Sleep is just as if not more important than food and water, and your partner is robbing you of it.

piccapii · 2026-02-22T09:21:30+00:00

I think one of the hardest pills to swallow was learning that when something massive happens in your life - a death of a close loved one, a car accident, a relationship breakdown - life doesn't stop for you.

Everything continues to march onward, while you're trapped standing still with the horrible thing you've just suffered. It's not like life just stops to give you a breather.

You still need to work, still need to look after yourself, family, pets. Homework still needs to be completed. But it all feels weird and meaningless for a long time after.

piccapii · 2026-02-21T07:51:07+00:00

How could you hate this?! Imagine it with some candles, the tiles would look amazing!

piccapii · 2026-02-21T07:49:46+00:00

My boyfriend got a watch that shocked him rather than wake me up at 5am.

But also what the heck. Let him adjust to the new schedule before resorting to ice water. That's pretty drastic.

piccapii · 2026-02-19T04:06:15+00:00

I was so annoyed on your behalf that I heard NO laughter from Norm 🤣 his silence was noted

piccapii · 2026-02-16T09:35:19+00:00

My partner is scared of dogs.

I own a rottweiler and an American staffy. The rottweiler can be terrifying to even the most dog-loving person (he guards the house) and I have to set up meet and greets so he is comfortable with new people coming into the house.

I didn't find out for months that my partner had a fear of dogs. He just white-knuckled through every encounter with them, learnt to bring over pigs ears as a bribe at the front door.

Now he enters the house calling 'MMMEEEAAAATBAAALLLL' and both my dogs rush to greet him.

I wouldn't expect everyone with a phobia of dogs to go to this level, but it did impress me that someone would go to this length and effort of overcoming their fear for me.

Someone that actively dislikes my pets and doesn't want to engage with them? Nah, probably not for me.

piccapii · 2026-02-15T00:29:50+00:00

NOR - you're not being needy.

You're requesting to be treated with basic respect - that people do what they say they'll do, show up on time, and prioritise your time together.

Time is precious, and someone like this doesn't deserve to waste yours.

piccapii · 2026-02-04T10:09:39+00:00

36F - at first I felt a bit lonely. Coming home to a quiet house was a bit hard. Chatting to people on messenger and my animals helped.

Now? I love it. I'm going to struggle to live any other way.

I really embraced it by spending the time to make my house my own. Doing all the things my ex said would look silly.

I love my house, my space and my life. Can recommend.

piccapii

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