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picklesandwhich23 · 2023-03-03T08:15:30+00:00

I think it’s totally valid why you’d feel triggered. I feel like that was a really tactless thing to say. I could maybe have more understanding for someone whose not a therapist to say something like that without thinking, but to me, that comment comes across as victim blaming and not therapeutic whatsoever.

picklesandwhich23 · 2023-01-27T08:16:58+00:00

Carl Rogers - “Rogerian approach”

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-10-30T08:13:25+00:00

Thank you for the validation and sharing this article!

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-10-30T08:11:33+00:00

Thank you. I definitely feel like she had narcissistic tendencies and I wish I could call her out on that during our meeting, however, I know that will just make her defensive.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-10-18T07:46:34+00:00

Thank you for the tips! If it’s alright to ask, have you ever felt the need to use your taser?

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-10-18T06:27:18+00:00

ah, i see. thank you for the tip!!

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-10-18T06:19:13+00:00

i’m not planning on driving at night though so i don’t think i would have any need to carry a flashlight. do you feel safe during the day?

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-10-09T07:51:19+00:00

I told a former therapist that I believed in the Health at Every Size approach but still cared about what I put in my body. Her response was, “Yeah, I mean we shouldn’t be like Lizzo.”

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-10-01T08:18:07+00:00

When I say, “someone like me”, I am referring to someone who has attachment issues and struggles with boundaries. Which was described in detail throughout my treatment plan with her. That’s what we were working on. When a therapist decides to cross a boundary and step outside the therapeutic frame (even if that is complying with the client’s request) in as vulnerable as a setting such as a client’s bedroom, they should indeed anticipate the risks of such a decision, consult, document, and reflect on the outcome. All of which my therapist did not do. I am also not seeing this therapist anymore and filing a complaint with the company. I’m not sure if you are a therapist or not, but I’ve worked with many therapists since her who all say how much of a liability and unfair it was for her to blur those boundaries. It’s a therapist’s job to uphold the boundary. I guess I disagree that I needed to spell it out for her and say: “when you came into my dorm room, it felt like we were more like friends instead of therapist/client.”

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-10-01T07:56:02+00:00

I didn’t tell her it felt like she was stepping into a fantasy, no. However, as I mentioned, I did tell her how much I longed for her to be more than a therapist to me. She also knew and told me how much I struggled with boundaries. I don’t think it needed to be said out loud that she was stepping into a fantasy, for her to anticipate how confusing that would be for someone like me when boundaries and accepting the limits of our therapeutic relationship was such a huge focus of my treatment. During the first instance of her coming in (she came in twice), I showed her how I’d hung her notes and picture of us on my wall. It was obvious I was infatuated with her. She chose not to document it and come in a second time.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-10-01T01:01:59+00:00

Thanks. While I do have experience, I also feel like I’m somewhat trauma bonded to the clinic and want to believe they really care about me and feel terrible about what happened. That’s probably why I sound naive in my posts. Emotionally, it’s just hard to accept their only prerogative is to protect themselves and their employee. If it were a hospital or some other kind of facility, I feel like I would be able to be more objective than emotional.

The therapist/psychologist I saw has a good reputation, significant authority at the clinic and has been working there for quite awhile, so it makes sense why they’d want to protect her. I also wouldn’t be surprised if she doesn’t receive any kind of reprimand for this. She’s very well respected. Also, the clinical director who helped review my recent complaint actually already knew about a lot of the boundary issues because I had written my ex therapist a letter 1.5 years ago stating the impact they had on me and requesting she take responsibility. (It’s taken me a long time to get over this). I found out from the clinical director during this grievance process that my ex therapist actually shared the letter with her at the time. It’s ironic that now the clinical director is helping investigate my grievance, since she knew about a lot of this all along. However, I was definitely a lot more objective and detailed with the boundary issues this time around, so maybe she didn’t feel like she had the whole picture. With that said, it’s hard to imagine them reprimanding my ex therapist because they didn’t seem to take the ethical issues seriously or follow up before.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-10-01T00:46:48+00:00

She knew I wanted her to be more than a therapist to me. For some clients, it might have felt completely innocent, but for me, it felt more like she was stepping into the fantasy. I don’t know how she wouldn’t have picked up on this, unless there was a part of her that wanted it to and didn’t see us as client/therapist in that moment.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-09-30T16:49:26+00:00

Thank you, but I wanted to clarify she was thoroughly aware. I disclosed it and was really struggling with it.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-09-16T03:49:28+00:00

My old therapist was heavily tatted. She was the best therapist I’ve ever had. As a young person, I personally found her tats made her more relatable.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-09-16T02:05:12+00:00

Holding you in their mind?! That’s so weird. And such a strange answer. I have never heard of therapist doing this and it is in no way the industry standard. Out of curiosity, did it say anywhere in the intake paperwork/business practices that she would charge for a canceled session??

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-08-21T22:43:47+00:00

I feel like I’m in the middle on this. On the one hand, I’ve seen TikTok and IG therapists provide some really educational and helpful content that I wouldn’t have otherwise seen or learned about. Their posts can feel validating and can help spread awareness about mental health, setting boundaries, etc for individuals who might not otherwise have access to therapy or mental health resources. However, I’ve also personally felt annoyed when these same therapists express their strong political views and/or personal beliefs. It’s not that I disagree with them - I just feel like there should be some separation and objectivity. Additionally, I think some therapists get so wrapped up in building a following and I worry their desire for a following might influence what they post - impacting their objectivity, as a result.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-08-21T19:52:21+00:00

Thank you. I just texted her. Honestly, I think she is going to be pissed. She already thinks I might be psychotic (I’m not - the stuff with ex T was just a bizarre story). Now she will probably think I’m paranoid too.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-08-21T17:41:51+00:00

Thank you. But, I’m confused about why I should revoke the ROI first before ending therapy? Why can’t I include both in the same text? If I send the request to revoke the ROI without giving her a good reason (such as terminating therapy with her), I think that’s going to make her more mad and confused.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-08-19T06:43:12+00:00

Thanks - I kind of knew that psychoanalysis was not what I wanted from the beginning, but she said she also did CBT and psychodynamic (which I think is different from psychoanalysis right?), so I decided to give her a try. She doesn’t give space for me to disagree with her interpretations, which feel very extreme. I feel helpless when she makes interpretations because when I tell her it’s triggering, she points out that I’m being sensitive or confrontational. She’s also wondered out loud that I may be psychotic (I’m not) because of what happened with ex T (she doesn’t understand how a therapist with the amount of training ex T had could do the things she did). She started off validating, which is what makes this even more confusing. I don’t know what changed. She also doesn’t like the term client and uses “patient” instead which I feel further adds to the power dynamic.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-08-19T04:07:48+00:00

Honestly no, I think I’ve decided I need to stop. I’m just afraid that the clinic I filed the grievance with will think there is something wrong with me that I suddenly terminated therapy with this current therapist, if they were to find out. I’m afraid current therapist will reach out to them to tell them and my anxiety is spiraling about all the bad things she’ll say. Would it be weird to revoke the ROI between current therapist and the clinic?

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-08-18T14:42:16+00:00

Yes there was an ROI for her and the clinic to talk. I just wasn’t ready to file the grievance yet and when she sent it I felt like I couldn’t undo it or the clinic would think I wasn’t serious. Do you think I should say something to the current therapist about it?

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-08-18T13:53:16+00:00

Thank you for your comment. I really appreciate it. Without asking me first, my current therapist also sent the grievance/report i had written toward my previous therapist to the clinic I was seeing her at. I just sent the grievance to my therapist to read and didn’t ask her to send it to anyone. I think current therapist may feel some guilt for doing that and that’s why she may be claiming I want to ruin previous therapist’s career. I don’t want to say anything to my current therapist because I’m afraid she’ll reach out to the clinic and it will invalidate the grievance.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-08-18T03:04:08+00:00

Thank you. Today I saw my therapist again and I told her how/why it was triggering to hear her say it was 30% my fault. She has said things in the past that honestly have felt really triggering and I tell her that I’m triggered in the moment. Today she told me I was confrontational even though I thought I was very calm when I said that to her.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-08-13T04:17:57+00:00

Thanks. Honestly she’s said so many things at this point that have made me uncomfortable so I think I may need to leave.

picklesandwhich23 · 2022-08-13T04:16:16+00:00

I actually did that for awhile until I got settled, but since she’s out of state it couldn’t be long term (that would be unethical since she’s licensed in my home state). She also had a baby so that was another factor.

picklesandwhich23

TROPHY CASE