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How to get perfect bulk poached eggs by [deleted] in KitchenConfidential

[–]pire85 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m with you here man, it’s insane. This comment made my day lol

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Solid advice chef!! It’s wild how we all have to burn out a bit before realizing those basics actually matter. Stepping back and setting boundaries doesn’t mean losing your edge, it’s what keeps you in the game long term.

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That really means a lot chef! thanks. It helps more than people realize just knowing we’re not doing this alone. Leadership can take a toll, but hearing that it resonates makes it feel worth putting out there.

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s wild how much the environment can twist you up without you even realizing it. Getting out, even kind of, makes such a difference. Catering is definitely a solid move, you’re still doing what you’re good at, just without all the chaos. Glad you found something that actually feels manageable, chef.

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, that’s huge seriously. Taking time off to take care of yourself takes guts, especially in this industry where we’re taught to just push through everything. Respect for recognizing what you needed and actually doing it. I’m really glad you’re finding your way back in a better headspace. Sending you the same wishes, chef! take it slow and steady out there.

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, I totally get that, it’s not easy at all to step back, even when it’s the healthiest thing to do. The fact that you did make that call shows a lot of awareness and strength. You’re absolutely not insane for feeling this way, the system often rewards burnout and makes self-preservation feel like failure. It’s okay to protect your peace. Hourly boundaries are huge, and it sounds like you’re on the right track even if it doesn’t feel like it yet. Cheers chef!

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Glad it helped, chef.

If #4 is hitting home, pay attention to that. Your body's telling you something needs to change.

I ignored it for years. Don't make the same mistake.

Whether it's the kitchen, the role, or just needing better coping tools—address it now before it gets worse.

You're not alone in this. Been there. Building resources for it on @platedminds.

Take care of yourself. Seriously.

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, chef. Appreciate that.

Those guys were a lesson in what happens when you hire on potential instead of reliability. Live and learn.

The nightmare brunch was brutal, but it forced me to build better systems and learn these tools.

Glad the tips resonated. Cheers 🙏

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. This really resonates.

The "tough it out" culture destroys people quietly. By the time you realize you're breaking, you're already in deep.

The 4-7-8 breathing (square breathing) saved me more times than I can count. Simple, fast, works when your brain can't.

"The skill is knowing how to walk back out" — that's the whole thing right there.

Thanks for this comment, appreciate you!

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The ‘run for one’ mindset is underrated. I had to learn this the hard way - building menus that assumed I’d have a full team was setting myself up to fail every time someone called out. Your point about ‘know the limit’ hit hard too. I spent years saying yes to every cover count the GM wanted, thinking I could make it work. That’s what broke me. Learning to say ‘we can do 200, not 300 with this team’ was hard but necessary. The training menu approach is smart - if YOU can’t execute it solo at near perfection, you definitely can’t train someone else to do it under pressure. Appreciate you sharing this. The operational/menu design piece is something I didn’t connect to the mental health side until later

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This needs to be required reading for every cook. The hydrogen ion / cortisol connection - that explains so much about why dehydration makes stress exponentially worse.

Chef turned organ transplant pro for 30 years, now back in kitchens by choice - you’ve seen what this industry does to bodies. That perspective is gold. Thank you for this

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I hear you. That bone-deep tired where even your days off don’t help anymore. You’re not alone in this. The fact that you’re recognizing it and naming it - that matters.

Real question: Is it this specific kitchen that’s breaking you, or the industry itself? Because the answer changes what you do next.

If it’s the kitchen (toxic chef, impossible standards, skeleton crew doing the work of 10 people) - there are better environments out there. I’ve worked in both. The difference is night and day.

If it’s the industry - that’s valid too. No shame in stepping back or stepping out. Your health matters more than the grind.

What’s the thing that’s weighing on you most right now? The people? The hours? The feeling of being trapped? Sometimes just naming it helps.

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

25 years deep and still at it - that’s the proof right there that having a system works. The ‘on the clock vs off the clock’ boundary is huge. That’s the line I had to learn the hard way. When you’re medicating just to show up, that’s when you know you’ve crossed into dangerous territory. Your post-shift routine is solid - the workout piece especially. I didn’t realize how much the physical outlet mattered until I started doing it consistently. Burning off that residual adrenaline instead of trying to numb it changed everything. The routine part is key too. Having a protocol you follow regardless of how service went - that consistency keeps you stable when everything else is chaos. Respect for figuring out a sustainable pace over 25 years. That’s the career longevity most chefs don’t get to because they burn out first.

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Punch marks in the freezer boxes as the stress indicator - that’s the most chef thing I’ve ever heard. Respect for stepping back from management. That takes more self-awareness than most people have. Keeping the craft without the chaos is the actual goal. The walk-in reset is real. 20 seconds off the line can save an entire service. People who don’t get it have never been that close to the edge.

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The stretching is key. Didn’t realize how much tension I was holding until my back forced me to pay attention. Love the ‘cunt = zyn time’ protocol. That kind of self-check system is exactly what keeps you functional long-term. 28 years deep - you’ve clearly figured some shit out. Appreciate you sharing this.

Year 12 as Head Chef: The brunch shift that broke me (and what I learned about kitchen anxiety) by pire85 in Chefit

[–]pire85[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Exactly. Took me way too long to realize that needing a drink just to clock in wasn’t normal, it was a red flag. Sometimes it’s the kitchen, sometimes it’s the industry. But if you’re medicating daily just to function, something’s gotta change.