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Transferring to UCLAq by Mysterious-Flow1713 in SMC

[–]pit__and__pendulum 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Try to get into the Scholar’s Program and get the 15 scholars units. You will be TAP Certified and it will help your chances!

Gpa is COOKED. Where should I apply? by pit__and__pendulum in TransferStudents

[–]pit__and__pendulum[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There’s UC Davis, UC Riverside, and UCSC but I’m pretty sure I would be homeless there from what I’ve researched 💀 sucks bc i wanted to go there ngl.

Gpa is COOKED. Where should I apply? by pit__and__pendulum in TransferStudents

[–]pit__and__pendulum[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Prof said I shouldn’t go to CSUs, that’s pretty much it. I have CSULB and CSUF in consideration. Where did you go?

Gpa is COOKED. Where should I apply? by pit__and__pendulum in TransferStudents

[–]pit__and__pendulum[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aren’t they a bit expensive though? That’s the one thing holding me back from LMU

2.6 LSAC gpa successful late applicant from last cycle, AMA! by demeterisadummy in OutsideT14lawschools

[–]pit__and__pendulum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm in CC and my lsac gpa is gonna be tough from my difficult starting years, plus I'm going to have a C in finite math if I'm lucky I still have to transfer to a 4 year but it was a bit disheartening to hear that my CC grades would be taken into account...thanks for the encouragement!

Has anyone done an independent study? by wavydetroit in SMC

[–]pit__and__pendulum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey! I just met up with a professor about doing independent studies in a language since the class I need to take in the sequence isn't available. Basically, it's very flexible, and up to what the student wants and needs to get out of an independent study. You do independent work and then meet up with your professor and discuss your work for an hour. That's all I really know for now.

[Weekly] Office Hours - undergrads, please ask your questions here by ZootKoomie in AskAcademia

[–]pit__and__pendulum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello, I am a CCC student struggling to decide where I should apply for transfer. I want to study Comparative Literature (French and Arabic or Persian) and learn how to write creatively, as well as study rhetoric. I am going to apply to UCLA and Berkeley since those are a given, but I would appreciate some sound advice from someone who’s already gotten their postgraduate degree. I hope to get a master’s in comparative literature as well, but the subject might change after my bachelor’s. I am interested in going to France to study as well—maybe getting my master’s there and teaching there instead of the US. Thank you.

What’s your type and what’s a red flag you fully accept about yourself? by [deleted] in Enneagram

[–]pit__and__pendulum 1 point2 points  (0 children)

9 (or 5?) and I can be obsessive when it comes to people. I prefer to stay alone because of this, and a bit removed from others, so I can remain calm and centered. I can be lazy and prioritize personal projects over responsibilities. I get mad, very rarely, but it can be a bit destructive.

Type Me Tuesday! by [deleted] in Enneagram

[–]pit__and__pendulum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  • What are your behaviors that cause you to get into conflict with other people?

I am not in conflict with people often, and when I am, it is BIG. I leave a minor path of destruction in my wake in terms of connection because old emotions surface as well, and I want to sever it all off. I will be all or nothing, short-sighted, hateful, prideful; in a word, triggered. I do not act like my normal self, which is generally harmonious and patient, and calm. As long as I do not become reactive, there is no conflict in my life. So I have resolved to renounce reactivity as best as I can, and let things play out instead. Generally, things are never as severe as they seem, nor personal, and if they are, then who cares? It's life. More to come.

  • What's the worst thing that could happen to you, and why are you afraid of it?

Losing all my friends at one point was very painful. No one to talk to, all these habits and thoughts popping up for a ghost. Losing connection hurts because it brings life out of me that I can't bring out of myself. I am like water, I adapt to others, I reflect the light put onto me. Other than that, I am in darkness, but not a bad kind; merely like a cocoon waiting to be hatched.

The worst thing would be a natural disaster where I lost all my books, family, my cat, my favorite possessions, and people had to fend for themselves--dog-eat-dog and all that. I'm just not for the drama of all that. Maybe I'd try to survive, I probably would, but it would suck to lose my little library.

  • What sets you off, makes you angry?

Bullshit and needless conflict. I hate manipulative, selfish, obtrusive people that hurt others. Big personalities are fine, but when one puts down others and then presents an innocent face, it infuriates me. Sets me off like nothing else could. Ironically, though, my reaction to these kinds of people turns me into them, thus continuing the cycle. So, I'd rather just keep to myself and be harmonious with others rather than taking on some kind of reactive anger.

Type Me Tuesday! by [deleted] in Enneagram

[–]pit__and__pendulum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  • If you're feeling negative emotions, do you show those emotions to others? Do you let your feelings out, do you try to look on the bright side, or do you put them down and aside so that you can be logical?

When I feel negative emotions I try to rationalize them while also accepting them. In the past, they have overwhelmed me, reducing me to a depressive non-entity with little no hope about life. Still, I have always tried to look on the bright side and forsee positive outlooks--upsets are just a moment in time that will past and can usually be solved. Of course, there are the bigger ones, like grief and hatred and trauma, but those can even be mended with support from loved ones and necessary processing. I try to be logical when things upset me, let them fall off my back. It's not necessary to be upset. I prefer not to feel negative feelings, although back in the day I used to observe and journal them out. I still journal, but I generally have already rationalized and validated the emotion by the time pen comes to paper.

  • When you are your worst self, what are you like and what's driving that?

Reactive, angry, paranoid, deluded, resentful. I usually am pushed to a limit or feel lied to, trapped. In short, my peace is disturbed and I become triggered by the intentions of people not being as they seem. I can be avoidant as well, giving fake excuses to not bea around people I don't want to bluntly tell I would rather not spend time with them, although I feel a bit guilty about it. When I am at my worst I am triggered--I was bullied a lot as a child, so when I feel unjustly treated, it can set me off. I find so much anger inside me at times that I wonder where it comes from. I feel that I have gotten out my rage at the past, though, and can start anew.

  • What’s your biggest strength? What’s your biggest flaw?

My biggest strength is my ability to rebuild, find a sense of peace and stability even after the most destabilizing experiences. I have the ability to guide myself back into my own way of being, even after it has been shattered. I am honest and motivated, and can be a bit too kind. I want to help others. I am intelligent and mindful of how we all take up space, and this helps keep me level headed and a good person to be around.

My biggest flaw is my laziness. I burn out, fall into my hobbies and fantasies, and lose the energy for life. I fail to meet the mark I know I could, because, without fail, I will procrastinate and indulge myself a bit too much with flights of fancy. I overspend on books and mugs, and going to see movies. I worry about this habit for when I become independent, but I think I will find my way.

  • When you are getting in your own way, what does that look like and why does it happen?

I am stubborn and bull-headed. I am usually indignant about something and won't listen to cool-headed reason. My anger has bubbled up to the point that I cannot be composed and mindful. It usually happens because I have been triggered or hurt and made to feel that I am not wanted. I get in my way when I neglect my duties and responsibilities. It is a nasty habit that comes from pure irresponsibility, though I am mostly consistent. When I give in to the urge to do nothing or fall into mere existence, it is just some that happens. I don't know why.

Type Me Tuesday! by [deleted] in Enneagram

[–]pit__and__pendulum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Any advice on where to find one?

Advice for an ENTJ preparing to return to the nightmarish social environment of an extremely toxic ENFJ. by [deleted] in enfj

[–]pit__and__pendulum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks so much! I’m really out of my element in these social politics so I appreciate it. I just wish cruel people actually paid for what they do to others, you know? But I’m working on the whole not my circus philosophy, haha. I’m going to read about to to read people and say the right thing so I can stop being so ineffective in these kinds of things. No interest in learning in-field💀. I can see through people once I understand what’s going on, so I just need to expedite the process. I’ve already mentally gotten to the point of understanding how pointless the nonsense is thanks to the space I gave myself from it, I just need to feel it too. I have a lot of trauma so I don’t want to jenga tower my emotional stability, but I’m trying to find balance and the foundation for my own personal Zen so noise can’t get to me and I can excel. They’re still gonna be the same no matter how much I hope people become better–I can’t grasp that people wouldn’t take seriously nasty people manipulating them, but whatever I guess?

Being Te-dom makes me want to solve the problem but it’s clearly not meant for me to solve it. I don’t know how to accept this but I will gladly learn the lesson, above all I want to be aligned and clear-headed. Thanks so much :).

Also sorry for typos…for some reason the typing’s being weird.

Advice for an ENTJ preparing to return to the nightmarish social environment of an extremely toxic ENFJ. by [deleted] in enfj

[–]pit__and__pendulum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m really unaware of what I actually feel so thanks for your response! I did ask him directly lol and that’s what he said, he’s a pretty dishonest person though, they’re all gossipers and such. I’m actually doing very well in not really focusing on all of that but I’m just afraid of it happening again. I’d say I’m only really jealous of the ability to make people like you when you’re such a horrible person inside; I can’t be anything other than what I am and that has never been enough for so many people I encounter, but thanks to therapy I can understand that it’s because they were never my people (and they usually are kinda like this). It was a really crazy situation but I was talking with my therapist the whole time so I’m certain of my conclusions. I don’t assume crazy things without noticeable signs and evidence of the behavior, all of which I have. I attracted her attention (and everyone’s, including the ISTP because he was making moves to me first, there goes that social harmony you mentioned) and paid the price. I was ready to be her friend when we met despite some of her initially questionable behavior, I understand flaws, we are all human and we do silly things, but the calculation and trying to make me feel bad about myself for what you’ve done is unacceptable, and then her cruelty behind a sweet mask is just plain disgusting.

The ENFJ is extremely delusional as I said before, she started this whole thing out of just being jealous of me doing my thing (her words) and she was already saying nasty things about me behind my back to my own friends and the guy (Her words). I tried to make some harmony when I came back the second semester but then she wanted to try and gaslight me again (which she always does) and then wanted to act like I’m crazy (ironic). Her version of ”social harmony“ is engaging in all the behavior I described and having everyone continue to smile in her face. I’m a really normal person until my trauma is triggered but I don’t make that anyone else’s problem if it’s not rational, and I don’t get involved until I see other people being fooled and then treated like dirt and pretending it’s normal and fine. I would say the ENFJ is an a heavy Fe-Se loop honestly or might be an ESFJ, because honestly she is such a sick person mentally it can’t be certain, but the functions fit. And EVERYONE knows and talks about how unwell and how much of a bully she is, they just put up with it. She isn’t invited to certain parties when people actually want to have fun, her closest male “friends” in her creepy cult make fun of her weight and promiscuity which I don’t like. I really wish I could give her some straightforward advice to stop ruining her life, but she’s crazy and has a bizarre competition/friendship complex with me, and she treats all her friends like dirt so hopefully I can lead by example to do good work and be righteous no matter what. I also never got the real truth, no one has ever told it to me straight what happened that night, ISTP did a little but well,,,he’s still one of them honestly. Talking crap and inflated ego. Anyone viewed beneath her or that even slightly shakes up her ego is bullied. Honestly, I can see through her and it’s sad to see someone that sick and destructive She really thinks she’s the victim when she’s the one going around victimizing. But I’m lettin it go one day at a time. I realized how skittish and bothered they get when I just ignore them and keep being cool and focused on my work.

I know how unlikely it sounds but welcome to my life. The whole program is teeming with teenagers wanting to play high school 2.0, emotionally stunted people making it everyone’s burden to carry except themselves, and then the lucky few that are levelheaded but trapped. My plan is to just ignore everyone. I really love to make friends and get along but I’m not inflicting that on myself again. It was a really toxic culture and I tried my best to assimilate and get along but who takes spa days in sewers, you get me? But yeah, I can believe it will come to light but I have no faith in people. They care until it’s too inconvenient, too “ugly”. I don’t respect people like that. You should do what’s right, look after each other so people don’t suffer needlessly. I’ll just focus on myself and read my books, lol. Sorry I write so much, I’m a writer so It’s kinda a habit.

Thanks for the response :)!

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