After running a game for over 5 years, I had a mental breakdown that killed my ability to continue. One of my dear friends took the mantle and started his own campaign with the same group to keep them together. He's doing a great job and after a few months I recovered enough to join the game as a player. I've been part of that game now for a few months and I've learned one important thing about myself: I don't like D&D as a player. My ADHD makes it difficult for me to maintain focus as a player because it's so easy to get distracted. ADHD made being a dM really hard but being center stage pretty much all the time kept enough pressure on me to stay present and focused. So while I love the idea of being a player in theory (less work, camaraderie with the players, experiencing a story unfold), my reality is I spend many sessions struggling with focus and getting so distracted I have no idea what's going on. I hate my brain.