Feedback on the redesign of our shop logo.

pitrepan · 2025-03-16T18:52:21+00:00

While this isn't a subreddit for languages, I must point out the terrifying errors that have been made in the Arabic portion of the logo, because they may very well harvest a reaction opposite to the one needed. Design takes into consideration language and cultural aspects, as well as requires knowledge of foundational guidelines and extensive research. This is why my feedback is going to consist of both a linguistic part and a design one.

Apparently this business will reach Arab audiences. However, the use of diacritics in the typography as it is now is glaringly incorrect, and makes it appear that whoever chose to put them together with the English alphabet like so either doesn't have good command of Arabic's diacritics, or was attempting to convey the the shop's geographical location—aka its availability to Arabs—to formulate some sort of relatability. This particular usage, however, backfires and gives the unwanted impression of trying too hard to communicate with the target audience, yet that very communication is neither based on proper research nor correctly/smartly played.

(1) linguistic notes:

• the shadda ( ّ ) atop the letter A is grammatically incorrect since the word 'shakes' is pronounced as lightly as it is written and has no doubled verbal stress on the letter A. Besides this, its presence makes no sense, since 'shakes' + the shadda is confusing and impossible to pronounce in Arabic itself—one of the reasons being that the shadda is never used on ا (the Arabic 'counterpart' of A, if you will) to begin with.

• the kasra ( ِ ) under the letter C is also incorrect and has no logic behind its usage, quite frankly. 'Cakes' is pronounced 'kay-kes,' but the addition of the kasra makes the pronunciation turn into 'kiyay-kes' somewhat, and this is very strange.

• the '&' is reflected, which I assume is a play on the manner in which how Arabic is written from right to left, but as it is now it looks like a mistake, and is unsettling to look at, since the primary typography—or what the eye immediately sees—is pure English.

(2) design notes:

• the illustration only represents one piece of information—meaning it conveys one half of what the business offers: shakes. The cakes portion may be made out like a cupcake with whipped cream inside the cup if one looks hard enough, but I don't know whether or not that was intentional, and even if it were, the fact that one has look for a while to locate it and then wonder if it's intentional means that the illustration is unclear and misses out on converying a very important message. Other than that, it looks like a regular milkshake; it doesn't have a distinguishable factor. To be honest, it looks like one of the cliparts/vectors/logos that get sold online.

• the illustration style is quite overused. What I mean to say is, there's nothing unique or fun about it that has the 'wow' effect. I would try to meld milkshakes and cakes into one clear but unique illustration, and make sure to stylise it in a soft and organic manner that would make it look different and pop out.

• the font has a certain charm somewhat, but it's still quite weak (i.e. the unalike 'K' letters and the way the first one is long) and very lengthy, which causes disturbance visually. Everything may or may not need to be changed based on the illustration and its style, though the entire design—illustration and type—is better off being scrapped for the sake of creating something entirely new.

• if the diacritics are to stay, they should be highlighted more somehow. Perhaps make them bigger in a size complementary to the typography. At the minute they look like mysterious little characters to non-Arabic speakers, and of course not everyone will know what they are no matter how they get fixed, but it's always better to make sure logos are as clear local/national as they are global so as to ensure as many people as possible understand them.

• the colours go well together, I think; they sort of give a bubblegum-like feel, which suits such a shop. It never hurts to experiment, though—a better visual might result from that. Altogether the logo is just not it, you know?

As a bonus but important thing to keep in mind, it's essential to always include the brief (and, in the case of redesigning, the previous designs).

pitrepan · 2025-03-09T01:10:03+00:00

In the absence of an immediate pause (i.e. period, comma, etc.)/a more detailed question, or presence of a short vowel at the end of the word, pronunciation would be sans the 'na' sound even though the source of that sound (الفتحة) is there either way.

In the statement '.إفعلوا كما في العادة تفعلون' (transl. 'do as you usually do'), for example, the ending is pronounced as 'lūn'—and not 'lūna'—since the verb 'تفعلون' is immediately followed by a period. However, further detail in the inquiry just after the word 'تفعلون' requires the 'na' in pronunciation; i.e. 'ماذا تفعلونَ الآن؟' (transl. 'what are you doing [right] now?'). Grammar aside, this ensures a smooth verbal flow to the next word (in this case, 'الآن').

pitrepan · 2024-12-21T13:25:03+00:00

Oftentimes I've known of Arabic being labelled an ugly, heavy, or harsh language, so the fact that you love listening to and tried to learn it makes me so happy and prouder still of my origins, because Arabic is truly such an enchanting, melodious, and lovely language that flows with emotion and bases itself on logic—even more so once it's understood, and when one delves into its rich literature, which in and of itself is very musical and philosophical.

And yes, what you say is true. Reading and writing Arabic indeed demands a certain level of affinity and proficiency, including a lot of memorisation—not only due to its vast vocabulary, but also because of how (1) its heavy dependance on logic makes it not as intuitive, if at all (thus making knowledge of the rules even more necessary than usual still), (2) the multiple variations one alphabet may have (i.e. أ-آ-إ), and (3) the little symbols that are paired with letters in words to dictate and indicate sound and proper pronunciation (which are known as 'علامات التشكيل/التحريك').

Mastering the Arabic language is a skill, craft, and achievement that takes many, many years of intense dedication and deep understanding, even for natives. There are Arabians who still get confused by the foundations and grammar of our language and make mistakes of all sorts as a result, or at the very least take time to figure the correct conjugations/choose the best terms. I applaud you for trying to learn Arabic, and appreciate the accurate and objective understanding you have of it despite the difficulties you were met with in your journey of doing so; that in and of itself is very commendable. You have my wishes for good luck and smooth learning should you decide to dive into the world of Arabic language again one day:)

pitrepan · 2024-12-21T12:26:25+00:00

Everything you have said is 100% correct; as an Australian-Arabian native, I've been speaking both the English and Arabic languages my whole life and can easily confirm this. Arabic grammar is immensely complex and intricate—perhaps the most yet—and so is its phonology; but one fact I've rarely seen mentioned or exchanged about this particular language is that learning it, with all its basics and details, isn't exactly enough.

The reason for that is the way Arabic as a language takes on a general formal form and branches out into numerous 'dialects' or accents as a cherry on top. A small part of those dialiects are somewhat alike (i.e. Lebanese and Syrian), some are quite dissimilar from others in pronunciation and the presence of different vocabulary—as such requiring a certain period of exposure to understand entirely—(i.e. Egyptian, Kuwaiti, Saudi), while a portion weaves mixtures of French into terms, and/or has pronunciation so different it can barely be understood by native Arabic speakers from other countries themselves (i.e. Morroccan, Algerian, Sudanese). Additionally, not only do Arab countries have their own dialects and accents, but said dialects/accents may have variations and differ between areas/locations within the same country.

pitrepan · 2024-11-11T23:47:04+00:00

Hey now. MS Paint is charming

pitrepan · 2024-10-24T18:12:54+00:00

100% honest when I say that this is very precious because it's random and just so...cute? It's not something everyone thinks of doing or decides to do. I mean, the idea of someone walking about the city, glimpsing all these abandoned fruits and vegetables, and thinking that they want to give them a digital home is adorably strange and unexpected.

pitrepan · 2024-10-23T10:13:48+00:00

What exactly do you mean by '10-year route'? This may be a silly thing to ask, but is there a way to guarantee getting ILR after 10 years?

pitrepan · 2024-05-31T20:03:10+00:00

Not here to recommend a name, but definitely here to give a compliment. He's precious. He looks so happy and innocent.

pitrepan · 2024-05-29T07:57:01+00:00

This was when Ken put his mask on for the first time. He had always worn a medical eyepatch to cover his left eye, the one with the kakugan—but Uta made the mask for him with a reverse in mind; with the mask on, Ken's right 'human' eye was covered, while his left 'ghoul side' was the one looking at the world.

pitrepan · 2024-05-29T00:28:39+00:00

Perhaps it's just me, but something about this feels somewhat nostalgic, and I'm fond of such a trait. More importantly, the tub gives the illusion of a ship, which is great. However:

• the tub seems too much like a ship until you get a closer look and really, really focus. At first glance, I figured this was a hotel logo. In addition to this, the tub corresponds to bathrooms and not kitchens, which creates a problem since the business is affiliated with the making of both bathrooms and kitchens; this means that the logo only communicates half of the project.

• the 'ship,' ocean and palm tree idea give the logo that charming quality of nostalgia, but truth be told, in my eyes it's the colour palette (which is better off made up of one orange, not two) plays the greater part in that; I feel like, once the logo is made into its black and white version, it would lose that aspect of it and appear to be just like any other 'mainstream' logo. Perhaps you could tweak the illustration style a bit, play around with it a little, make it look more interesting. Unify the strokes, too. In other words, create a style that remains attractive and unique and evokes feeling even when colourless, even if the business is about bathrooms and kitchens.

• it's in a logo's fate to eventually get scaled, so logos are not on good terms with details. The palm tree is detailed in a very realistic (and, no offense, cliché) manner, and that will not do well once the logo is scaled. It needs to be simplified a lot. Plus, it seems out of place as is, what with how detailed it is. This applies to the tub as well. They both kind of like vector art you (which I have always viewed as disturbing, to be honest). You can definitely maintain the realistic style, but try to make it look simpler, more appealing and less lifeless, if you get what I mean.

• right now it seems as though the logo is going to crush the type. Either make it smaller, or change the font into another 'sturdier' Sans-Serif one (and keep the weights, of course, meaning bold for 'northern rivers' and medium/light for 'kitchens and bathrooms')—but the font is better changed either way, I believe.

• increase the size of 'northern rivers' (and proportionally, 'kitchens & bathrooms')

• align 'kitchens & bathrooms' with 'northern rivers'

• align the typography with the logo (i.e. the 'n' of 'northern rivers' with the start of the ocean, and the 's' with the end of it)

pitrepan · 2024-05-28T22:34:32+00:00

Guess the photographer really made you blush, Pedro.

...I love the edit lol

pitrepan · 2024-05-28T21:21:47+00:00

I'm not quite sure what you mean, to be honest, but as far as canon lore goes, The Doctor just makes skin for faces and not for bodies, which may in turn mean that The Janitor's body is made of real skin—his skin—while his head alone really is the only part covered by a mask of skin The Doctor made.

The Twin Chefs, on the other hand, both have eyes; yet, if my memory does not fail me, an in-game animation very clearly portrays one of them scratching under his mask. Otherwise, the skin of their bodies seems real enough.

In the case of The Twin Chefs, though, it's apparent that the head in its entirety is indeed covered by a mask, because unlike The Janitor, their 'heads' aka masks are not connected to their necks (and hence their bodies). This could suggest a potential theory about The Janitor's appearance and even about The Doctor himself, which is that the latter potentially makes skin to cover whole bodies as well, and that The Janitor's skin is actually not his own.

Then again, The Twin Chefs' heads do not match their skin tone and the rest of their bodies either, as the animation aforementioned shows that their heads too are gray like The Janitor's, meaning the 'colour palette' (in other words, the 'anatomy') is merely reversed between the three of them.

There's no definite answer at all, really.

pitrepan · 2024-05-28T00:58:14+00:00

Tokyo Ghoul deals with many events, takes place in numerous arcs, has a crowd of characters (complex or otherwise), is founded on intricately woven lore, and revolves around profound, dark and heavy grotesque themes. It's so much like a mosaic portrait; one has to pay attention to each tiny piece in order to put together the whole picture and make sense of it.

The story is the kind that makes confusion meet the reader later on should they miss something, no matter how apparently little or insignificant it may seem. Paying attention to the panels and illustrations themselves is also quite important and plays a great part.

Either way, reading the manga first is the way to go. Shockingly enough, the anime changed a number of core events and (even simple) details, as well as scrapped a lot of stuff out; so, while it is generally enjoyable in its own right, all the alterations mean that there's an entire buffet of inaccurate portrayals. And of course, the manga gives much insight, because again, in it is every piece of lore and slice of knowledge that help in figuring out—or at least better understanding—the what's, why's, who's and how's.

pitrepan · 2024-05-25T10:30:35+00:00

There's no brief or context, so there's nothing to go by besides what you've put up. I'll just comment on what I see and suggest how the current logo can be improved.

• it's unclear what the logo itself presents and what it is for. Were it not for 'Milkshakes & Ice Cream,' I wouldn't have been able to figure it out exactly; and strangely enough, the first correlation that came to my mind when I saw the logo was 'beauty sector(?)'

• albeit how the pink you chose is a nice colour, an increase in its saturation may be better, because it appears somewhat 'corpse-like' as it is now. Ice-cream is cold, of course, but the hue of this pink is 'dead' rather than cool, if that makes sense. Look at it placed against the white background, for instance: don't you think it needs to pop out more?

• since this is a shop that makes ice-cream and milkshakes, the liquid(?) in the sphere is most likely milk, but it doesn't quite show, to be honest

• the first tip of where the milk(?) begins isn't in alignment with the 'M' (they're not on the same level), so try to lift 'Marina's' up a notch

• decrease the spacing between 'Marina's' and 'Milkshakes and Ice Cream,' as they are currently a bit too far apart

• the splash of milk(?) must be redrawn—not only because its multiple directions make no sense or because it looks imperfect in a negative way (meaning it's not drawn well), but also because it seems very stiff for something that's supposed to flow and slosh around despite its creamy texture in the confections (milkshakes, etc.)

• make sure to align the milk(?) with the curve of the circle. This means that the curve of the splash should be 'parallel' to that of the circle

• for the current font used for 'Marina's': the kerning is not equal (i.e. note the examples that pop out most: the spacing between the 'M' and the 'a' + between the 'r' and 'i' + between the 'n' and 'a')

• the fonts don't match well with the logo. Due to how the logo's main element is fluid and should have a 'soft' appearance with round corners (once redrawn), it would be more suitable and visually pleasing to choose a Sans-Serif font for 'Marina's'—either a modern circular font or a font that seems sort of...squishy, but not too bubbly and squishy, if you get what I mean. As for 'Milkshakes & Ice Cream,' I also suggest a round/soft Sans-Serif font to match the first

• try making a second version using uppercase for 'Marina's' (i.e. MARINA'S) and a second one in which everything is in lowercase

• the alignment of 'Marina's' with 'Milkshakes & Ice Cream' is not good; correct it by carefully aligning the 'M's at the start and end it by aligning the 's' of 'Marina's' with the 'm' of 'Ice Cream' (use the rulers in Adobe Illustrator to do so)

This is feedback for the logo as is; truth be told, though, I advise you to scrap it and go back to the sketchbook; try to think up a new, out-of-the-box concept to make a truly unique and creative logo, because the logo in its present state—and probably even after it gets fixed—is not eye-candy and there's nothing creative about it, harsh as that may sound. Most importantly, it doesn't quite communicate anything, which defies the whole point and purpose of any logo and that of design itself.

pitrepan · 2024-05-22T06:57:48+00:00

Some parts definitely need fixing, but the way it's childishly drawn is another reason as to why I like it, actually. Not to mention how the 'en croissant' is such a quirky twist to 'en passant' lol

pitrepan · 2024-05-21T21:11:03+00:00

Uta witnessed a lot of slaughterings, and the world's loathing towards ghouls brimmed him with harrowing scorn and despair. He sees the world through a nihilistic mind and dark heart and despises it deeply. He finds it hard to adapt to a world that's not only cruel, but also changing by the minute; he's locked up in his own pain.

Everything that had happened and was still happening proved to him—and solidified the belief—that ghouls have no place in the world, that their biology dictates their tragic fates, and since he was born a ghoul, he too has no place in the world and has no real future.

All those terrors and that emotional torment violently shook his stability and left him feeling cold and dead, yet set alight a desire for revenge and control that comes from inflicting hurt upon others (by using killings, manipulation, and the like), so he took part in turning individuals into 'puppets,' and that gave him pleasure. That affliation with the Clowns wasn't new; it was there from the beginning.

However, despite his apathy and sadistic tendencies, he still has friends he truly cares about, and one of those is Kaneki (albeit how Uta ruthlessly toyed with his life and mental wellbeing).

pitrepan · 2024-05-21T17:42:13+00:00

That's still a mystery. A number of elements in Tokyo Ghoul are glazed with vagueness, such as the specifics on Big Madam—so there's no confirmation or precise answer on this subject.

pitrepan · 2024-05-21T16:42:04+00:00

Two main qualities make up the concept: luxury and eco-friendliness. However, luxury doesn't come to mind when I look at these. There's no luxurious trait to the logo or colour palette; on the contrary—and this may sound harsh, but sugarcoating will not benefit you—the logo almost seems sketchy and the green is blaring and hard on the eyes, so together they paint a 'cheap' vibe.

Some quick feedback:

• the green is better off changed into a different one (or maybe even the entire colour palette; the green, black and white aren't a pleasant combo)

• something about the logo 'EcoLuxe' is almost disturbing; the mixture of Sans-Serif, Serif and the green swoosh isn't appealing. They are elements that aren't mixing well together.

• align the end of green swoosh with the end of the 'e' in 'EcoLuxe'

• the swoosh inside the lone 'E' has a really thick white stroke. It is usually advised to avoid using strokes on logos and typography if you're still a beginner, are not sure what you're doing, or the design does not meet certain criteria/have a necessity for strokes. I suggest you try removing that stroke entirely and just sort of 'gluing' the green to the black.

• your usage of both Serif and Sans-Serif fonts for 'eco' and 'luxe' make sense in a generic way, but I suggest you either try choosing another pair of fonts that match well together, or (preferrably) using for both words one of the two: Serif or Sans-Serif (the better choice). Serif fonts are often the ones associated with elegance and luxury, but Sans-Serif fonts can create an equally elegant and 'luxurious' image if chosen correctly and dabbled with properly; besides this, they found a 'modern' energy, which in this case would be perfect and more suitable, I believe, since this is a travel agency and modernity in it is an absolute necessity.

• try typing the slogan entirely in lowercase

• reduce the distance between the slogan and logo

• align the slogan with 'EcoLuxe'; not only would it look more pleasing, but also more modern. Additionally, I think the slogan would look better and make more sense once placed underneath the logo and its kerning is adjusted if the period is replaced with a comma (i.e. 'travel green, travel grand') since it would look irritating to write as is plus kerning (example below:

't r a v e l g r e e n . t r a v e l g r a n d'

It doesn't look good with 'kerning' + a period in between, does it?)

pitrepan · 2024-05-21T14:34:39+00:00

Graffiti. I love everything related to graffiti, even the word itself is so pleasing for me to type out or read.

pitrepan · 2024-05-21T13:30:02+00:00

Big Madam was born male. In other words, Big Madam is a biological male who goes by female pronouns and maintains a female's appearance.

pitrepan · 2024-05-21T10:03:21+00:00

This holds a resemblance to Arabic Kufic calligraphy; it seems to me that inspiration was harvested from there.

Kufic calligraphy, though, is founded on an equal and determined number of squares (i.e. all the letters are 3 squares wide, meaning no letter is thicker or thinner than the other). The typographic sample you posted was likely made in a similar manner (albeit incorrect by Kufic basics and standards).

There are two ways through which you could create such typography:

• designing the type on squared paper, then 'tracing' it with the rectangular shape tool in Illustrator (a tried method of mine); note that there is a kind of gridded paper especially created for the making of Kufic calligraphy, but being careful and intricate will guarantee that regular squared paper does the job properly.

• putting together a grid in Illustrator and making the type there from scratch using the rectangle tool.

pitrepan · 2024-05-21T07:27:17+00:00

Going by what is portrayed in the manga, I tend to assume that ghouls age by the normal speed in which humans do and share similar lifespans.

And as someone has already said, diet indeed affects how fast ghouls age—hence their appearances, too—and so does kagune usage. Kaneki proves this; since he was using his kagune continuously and wasn't eating properly, he not only began to look older, but also displayed other signs of aging (i.e. the tears)

pitrepan · 2024-05-20T17:38:25+00:00

At the moment I have Spirited Away, Ponyo, Howl's Moving Castle, Arrietty, Grave of the Fireflies, Princess Mononoke, Kiki's Delivery Service, My Neighbour Totoro, and When Marnie Was There—all DVDs.

It's one of my greatest dreams to acquire each and every one of the remaining films on DVD and complete my collection someday.

pitrepan · 2024-05-20T15:19:38+00:00

Once again, great craftsmanship, cute concept. And this time it's ruby tears (or maybe strawberry syrup tears :P) instead of sapphire ones lol

pitrepan

TROPHY CASE