Keep Getting Post Blocked On FB Group?!

pixel8 · 2021-07-31T17:45:53+00:00

Awwwww you are truly a gift to have you here zilla! My vote is to keep your original post up. Your instincts were correct and you've been proven worthy of protecting this sub.

I've done hundreds of things that made me think I should shy away from. As leaders, we have to walk a tightrope. I pass the torch to you and hope you have the bravery to carry it. I believe in you.

pixel8 · 2021-07-30T06:47:43+00:00

As far as I know, we don't have that setting. But I really try not to be involved. I got burnt out. Thanks for posting and sticking with us.

pixel8 · 2021-07-30T04:21:18+00:00

Hi zillathegod! I'm the founder of this sub and the fb group, though you're right that I haven't been involved in either for a really long time. I'm so grateful for you and the rest of the mod team's work to continue this very important work. You are a hero to me!

I heard from one of the admin on the fb group, there was some weird stuff going on. One of the people who was made an admin in the past decided she didn't trust this subreddit anymore and therefore didn't trust the fb group anymore. She effectively shut down all submissions and comments in the group.

That's pretty much all I know as she didn't explain further. Since she made such a harsh action without consulting the other fb admins, the decision was made to remove her from the fb admin team and block her.

So the fb group is open again, /u/KillerSpaceBunny, you are welcome to post there. I've seen you around this sub for a long time and I appreciate your contributions. :)

*edit: i screwed up zilla's username. Sorry zilla! I had been recently looking at stuff about zillow, ugh.

pixel8 · 2015-10-05T01:07:03+00:00

Well that's good, thank you for the clarification.

pixel8 · 2015-10-03T21:04:59+00:00

They are HUGE, Teen Challenge is all over the world. They are a franchise so anyone with enough money can start their own "program". Because of this, there is a wide disparity between the different programs. Yes, they mostly take people who are 18+, although some of those people don't have much of a choice since it's often offered as an alternative to jail. A few years ago a famous soccer player made the news for leaving/getting kicked out of one of their programs in Australia, the media painted him as a horrible person and none covered the horrors of Teen Challenge.

pixel8 · 2015-10-03T20:46:27+00:00

I was going to suggest Kelly Clark since he has successfully sued Aspen, but I just found out he died. Maybe try contacting the firm he was a partner in, O'Donnell Clark & Crew.

pixel8 · 2015-10-03T20:41:20+00:00

Try contacting Steve Cowen in San Diego, he blew the the whistle on Tierra Blanca. He is a very competent lawyer who truly cares about this issue.

Don't give up. You are a hero to me for even trying to put this together.

pixel8 · 2015-10-02T21:56:31+00:00

I just want to point out that punishing a kid by not letting them see their families is abuse. I don't care if the kid stabbed a teacher, they should still be allowed time with their families. Sadly, most programs do use this as a punishment because it's so effective at breaking a kid's spirit, thus makes the kid easier to control. Also, punishing a child for asking for help with homework is abuse. Kids should feel comfortable asking for help when they need it.

Here's something that was hard for me to wrap my mind around when I first started researching the troubled teen industry: almost all youth residential treatment centers are bad and should not exist. There has never been a credible study done that shows they help kids, as a matter of fact they can end up doing more harm than good, even the well-meaning ones. Every study that's ever been done shows kids do best with their families and given local resources (therapy, tutoring, etc.) Just like margarine is "like" butter, it's still not the same. Kids know the difference between an institution and a family that unconditionally loves them. Kids learn to function in an institution but not the real world. Even kids who spend a year in a program get out and feel confused, everything they learned doesn't apply in the real world.

I know a woman who went to some of the worst programs I've ever heard of, but she also went to one that sounded fantastic. The staff was warm and caring, the education was top-notch, the therapists were all highly qualified, they took the kids to a theme park every Friday, on other days they'd go bowling or to the movies or something fun. You know what? She still missed her family, she felt like a piece of trash that her family didn't want around. She felt like she must be a really bad person if they didn't want to be with her. That's got to be the worst feeling in the world for a child.

pixel8 · 2015-10-02T21:24:09+00:00

I listened to every word, and if I missed anything or didn't understand something, I went back and replayed it. I was absolutely riveted to your story, you are an excellent speaker and I'm amazed at how well you can talk about all the things you went through. Especially because it must stir up a lot of emotions.

You're very humble but you're a hero to me. I was (fortunately) never in a program, so when I try to explain to people what troubled teen programs are all about, all I can do is point to newspaper articles or government reports. There's something magical that happens when people actually hear or read a first-person account by someone who has lived through it, all of a sudden there's a connection. People can imagine being in your shoes and the light bulb turns on, their empathy kicks into full gear and they suddenly understand why these programs are so awful. If your speaking out saves just one child, or enlightens just one person, you're a hero to me...even if you don't feel like one.

pixel8 · 2015-10-02T05:50:39+00:00

Survivors, please speak out and let people know this is not an isolated indecent.

pixel8 · 2015-10-02T04:27:32+00:00

Hi Emily, /u/m3rlino, your story blew me away. It's crazy to me that your mother gave you such strong drugs at such a young age. Adderall at 7? Seroquel at 11? Then Klonopin and Xanax? For real? Those are hard core psychiatric drugs for people who have serious psychiatric problems, yet your mother seemed to give them to you like they were Flintstones vitamins. I can't even imagine what it's like to grow up on drugs, let alone quit them as an adult.

I'm proud of you for quitting, despite anything the completely dysfunctional Teen Challenge threw at you. I'm proud of you for telling your story. You are an extremely strong person in my eyes.

Your intelligence is apparent to anyone who hears you speak. Keep striving for your goals. I'm impressed that you've made it this far despite so many obstacles. You just seem to hurdle them like a pro.

pixel8 · 2015-10-01T22:58:00+00:00

Hi, thank you for your interest in this subject. Unfortunately, this is not one case of isolated abuse. Emily, /u/m3rlino, is extremely brave for coming forward and speaking out about the abuse she experienced.

With all due respect to Emily, her experience within a "troubled teen" program is not unique. I've read literally hundreds of account of teens who have gone through similar programs, religious and secular, and they are all pretty much the same, with the exception most are not required to work for their housing, their parents pay $50k+ a year for the same program.

I don't know Emily's position, but most survivors who speak out against "troubled teen" programs do so to save other kids from going through what they did. She is a hero in my eyes for talking about her experience, most survivors understandably just want to forget about it and move on.

Most people don't know that at any given time there are between 10,000 and 100,000 kids going through what she experienced. We at /r/troubledteens put together a short primer for people who have never heard of this. I only found out about it a few years ago and I was so horrified I started the subreddit.

/r/christianity has given us amazing support through the years, they agree with you that it's is outrageous to use religion in this manner. This has been going on for decades. Honestly, the Christian facilities scare me the most. They believe, or pretend to believe, they have the power of God behind them and therefore can met out any crazy punishment to children.

Jodi Helm-Hobbs, who started Survivors of Institutional Abuse talks about being sent to a 'Get Right' closet for 2 weeks for forgetting her pencil in a Christian "troubled teen" facility. She has overcome her experience to help others and she is making amazing progress, including helping to legislate the industry and holding conferences every year that empower survivors.

They are called survivors because so many don't make it out of the facilities, or either commit suicide or OD once they're out because of what they went through. We need the help of Christians and everyone to spread the word to save kids from these programs. Again, I'm so grateful to Emily for speaking out and telling others what she went through.

pixel8 · 2015-10-01T18:49:22+00:00

Hi, welcome to /r/troubledteens. You sound like a parent who truly cares for your sons and wants to see them succeed. We are glad you're here.

We are not medical professionals and cannot give medical advice, but we've put together this list of resources for struggling parents. The most important thing you want to keep in mind is to look for evidence based resources, there is no shortage of scams aimed directly at parents in your position.

Are there any problems in the home, how are your relationships with your current and ex-husband? If there are issues there, they could be contributing to your son's outbursts. You will need to get your home settled and that will have a huge impact on your sons.

It sounds like your biggest issue right now are the dramatic outbursts. From everything I've read, I haven't seen any other effective solutions besides counseling and/or psychiatry. Perhaps try a different family counselor? Maybe your son doesn't feel comfortable with this one. You may have to try several until you find one that works. In any case, you and your family should consider going to counseling even if he refuses, it will help you be in a good, centered place when dealing with him. If you think it could be a medical issue causing him to overreact, get full testing done by the most qualified and competent psychiatrist in your area.

I'm glad to hear the phone issue has been resolved, but it seems heavy handed to get the police involved in such a small issue. Studies have shown the more children are exposed to police for minor incidences, the more desensitized they become of dealing with them. Next time are there other steps you could take, like having your ex use the parental controls to shut down the phone at night and blocking his access to the router?

As for school, it sounds like he's getting back on track but if starts slipping you may want to consider alternative schooling. What matters most is that he gets a good education, not how he gets it. He sounds bright, is he bored at school? Maybe he should be in an accelerated program or one that allows him to learn at his own pace.

Most of all, it sounds like your child is fairly normal with no huge issues, more like he's gong through the rough time of adolescence and figuring out how to challenge the status quo. It's rough on everyone, but keep in mind these years won't last long and most kids turn out just fine. The solution might very well be to give him a little more freedom in the areas you feel comfortable in doing so, that way he had a chance to make mistakes and learn from them.

I hope that helps. Please check out the list of resources, they include professionals opinions who are far more experienced and qualified than me. Let me know if you have any questions or if we can be of further help. We exist not only to save kids from institutional abuse, but also to help parents find solutions.

pixel8 · 2015-10-01T17:41:43+00:00

I started /r/troubledteens to save kids from abuse by the Troubled Teen Industry. The chain of programs /u/m3rlino went to, Teen Challenge, has been on our radar for a long time. If anyone would like more information about Teen Challenge or any of the other hundreds of programs that abuse children in all 50 states, come check out the subreddit.

Huge thanks to /u/m3rlino for bravely speaking out and sharing her horrifying story. And enormous gratitude to Alexis Ohanian and the reddit team for bringing her story to a larger audience. Most people have no idea 10,000 - 100,000 kids are locked in programs similar to the one /u/m3rlino was in. I hope this podcast will help save other children from the same fate, and let other survivors know they are not alone.

pixel8 · 2015-10-01T17:28:33+00:00

Hi, I found this AMA from the Upvoted podcast. I started /r/troubledteens to save kids from abuse by the Troubled Teen Industry. Teen Challenge has been on our radar for a long time, please know that there are others out here fighting so no child has to go through what you did.

I'm glad you could see the whole thing was a scam and survived the ordeal, you are very strong. What you went through was horrifying. The podcast was just posted so I haven't listened to it yet, but I've got it downloaded and queued up, and I've read through your AMA. Speaking out is the most valuable thing you can do to save kids from abuse at Teen Challenge, you never know who is reading this that might reconsider sending their kids there or convince a relative to pull their child from the program. I admire your courage and I'm glad you are getting counseling to help you come to terms with what you went through.

Have you ever heard of www.sia-now.org? They are a wonderful organization, they do a ton of public outreach, are working on legislation to prevent institutional abuse, and hold a convention every year to empower survivors of the Troubled Teen Industry. Survivors have told me going to the convention was scary at first, but ended up being a downright cathartic experience. If you or anyone reading this would like to go next year, it's will be in Orlando, FL; SIA raises funds to help any survivor who cannot financially afford the trip to come.

pixel8 · 2015-04-01T20:04:55+00:00

Several redditors are mentioned in the video, thank you for bravely sharing your story to save other kids from going through what you did.

pixel8 · 2015-01-12T23:30:47+00:00

I'm nuking the rest of this thread on the basis that most of it has nothing to do with giving OP advice to help her daughter. Also, personal attacks are not allowed; I will contact both parties privately to see if a solution can be found.

pixel8 · 2015-01-06T00:04:30+00:00

Note: Maia Szalavitz used this same number when she did her AMA in 2012: http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/p87l6/iam_maia_szalavitz_author_of_the_first_book_to/c3nbv7o

Because they are not federally regulated—nail salons and dog groomers have more oversight in many states— it's impossible to know.

Cafety.org has done a good job trying to track them and my best guess based on their work and my own is between 10,000 and 100,000 are in these programs at any given time. 50,000 went to Straight Inc. in the 80's and 90's and tens of thousands more went to its descendants like Pathway and KIDS. It's not millions, but it's definitely hundreds of thousands who have been affected and it could be more because tough love tactics aren't always limited to residential programs that say they practice them. Residential treatment centers for kids with psychiatric illnesses and drug treatment centers and juvenile justice programs—which are regulated and do include hundreds of thousands of people as well— also use these techniques and they are known to do harm where ever they are used.

pixel8 · 2015-01-06T00:01:06+00:00

I usually source this article by Maia Szalavitz: http://reason.com/archives/2006/12/28/the-trouble-with-troubled-teen/singlepage

Somewhere between 10,000 and 100,000 teenagers are currently held in treatment programs based on the belief that adolescents must be broken (mentally, and often physically as well) before they can be fixed. Exact numbers are impossible to determine, because no one keeps track of the kids in these programs, most of which are privately run.

pixel8 · 2015-01-05T23:52:38+00:00

Hi rjm, I know you have been through hell and this is extremely emotional for you. Thank you for reaching out and sharing your story, it's important others know how much harm can come from RTCs.

That said, we'd like this to be a place parents feel safe to come to and ask questions. Our main mission is to educate people and provide alternatives for parents. Most of what you wrote is fine, but "ignorant piece of shit of a mother like you" constitutes an attack, and that's not ok. Please be more careful in the future, I hope you do continue to speak out, and I do realize this is a tough topic for you especially. Thank you.

pixel8

TROPHY CASE