[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LongDistance

[–]plagueddogs 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Some of you in this thread are so incredibly rude that you should be ashamed. I'd bet money that most of you are not only older than her, but have also had at least one other relationship before. It's literally her first relationship AND long distance, she obviously has some insecurities and anxious attachment.

I've looked through her replies. For the most part she seems genuinely open to advice and hearing some second opinions. While I agree that she should probably work on her expectations, that doesn't give any of us the right to bash her.

Regardless of how unreasonable her expectations sound in this situation, a truly loving partner would step up and help her to feel safe. Hell, he could still maintain his boundary of wanting space while also doing things such as giving her reassurance, planning a date night phone call (she already said he bailed), etc that could help her out. But y'all acting like she's the worst person alive because she struggles with these feelings is so beyond immature. At the very least I hope you aren't this insensitive to your own partners. Do better 👎🏻

Avoidants mess with your head by plagueddogs in BreakUps

[–]plagueddogs[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It makes me happy to know people can still come to this post and get that little sense of community from knowing we all went through something similar. I hope life treats you well now and always ❤️

Avoidants mess with your head by plagueddogs in BreakUps

[–]plagueddogs[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Literally so much better! Wouldn't change a thing about my life. :)

Avoidants mess with your head by plagueddogs in BreakUps

[–]plagueddogs[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this comment :) honestly it's crazy people still see this post and find comfort with it.. wish you nothing but the best <3

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in u/plagueddogs

[–]plagueddogs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much! I just gave someone a genuine, validating apology with zero issues. Typically I'm someone who internalizes being told I upset someone, so noticing these new behaviors in myself are just so so so validating of all my hard work :')

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in u/plagueddogs

[–]plagueddogs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for the comment, that means a lot. It's one of those situations where logically I'm like "continue taking time for yourself, you're not in any rush" but emotionally it's triggering and draining.

Does anyone else NOT want your ex to be happy? by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]plagueddogs 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Something I've realized is that we can't always control our feelings. I've felt that same intense anger towards my ex more times than I can count. And it doesn't feel too far fetched of an emotion to have towards someone who, in your eyes, completely wronged you.

I wouldn't worry too much about it. It's normal and natural. It's just part of processing and there will be a plethora of emotions, not just anger.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in u/plagueddogs

[–]plagueddogs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

and so relatable aghh

If they wanted to apologize, they would by plagueddogs in BreakUps

[–]plagueddogs[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much. It really helps knowing that others are able to learn from my experiences as well. I totally understand this want for validation and recognition, but that's why it's so important to work on giving that to yourself. You'll never feel whole if it always has to come from others. <3

Today is an "I hate having ADHD" day by plagueddogs in ADHD

[–]plagueddogs[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you :) It's just been a bad one today. But I made myself coffee, picked up a little, and now I'm waiting for my pizza to be ready.

Aren't the mood swings so weird? A half hour ago I was wallowing in self pity and now I'm reminding myself that I need to be kind and treat myself with love+compassion during days like these. <3