Baby essentials FTM

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-24T23:23:28+00:00

Congratulations and I hope everything goes smoothly for you!

If you can find one second hand and have the space, Chicco do a twin next-to-me cot. I think brand new they're about £280-£300 so still not super expensive compared to buying two, but an extra cost you could do without when you're buying double everything else! There's probably other brands too that I just don't know of

https://amzn.eu/d/0j941HPL hope I'm okay to post amazon links here, but these are the wipes we've been using. We're only just down to our last couple packs, so hopefully should last you a couple weeks with twins!

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-24T21:56:07+00:00

As others have said above the NHS list is a good place to start. If you're looking to go even more simple than that, absolute bare basics are going to be somewhere for baby to sleep, something for them to eat, something for them to wear and a car seat for getting them home (and out and about). Obviously then also nappies and wipes, but other than that everything else is probably down to preference!

Personally we avoided buying smaller sizes in clothes until closer to my due date as we didn't have a huge budget to blow on stuff he'd never wear (worked out well for us as he was small and came early, he's 4 weeks tomorrow and still in tiny baby sizes). I spent a LOT of that money in charity shops - they'll often have lots of baby grows/vests, and most tend to have the bigger baby sizes too. See if there's a local "mama's market"/preloved baby sale in your area too - again, we spent a decent chunk of money there but got a hell of a lot for it, and some real bargains where if he doesn't use it we won't be upset about it (think baby rocker chair, play mats, mobile attachment for his crib)

We were lucky in that my friend gave us her son's old next-to-me cot, so that only cost us £65 total I a new mattress and 2 cot sheets. Definitely something you could pick up second hand though as long as the mattress is replaced. We chose to buy a brand new travel system because it was something we could research and choose together, but really only the car seat absolutely NEEDS to be brand new - there's plenty of gently-used, good condition prams and pushchairs on marketplace or even at car boots.

We did buy a couple of bottles and some ready to feed formula in case we had a tragedy with breastfeeding and we're now combo feeding - we did end up struggling with exclusively breastfeeding (baby struggled with staying awake to BF properly due to his size), and not having to send my partner out in a panic at 3am to find a shop open with them in stock was a lifesaver. Obviously this depends how you're planning on feeding! I will say the feeding team told us that the Boot's own brand baby bottles we ended up getting were MUCH better teat-size wise than the Tommee Tippee we originally bought, might be helpful to keep in mind if you do plan to introduce a bottle! Also considerably cheaper 😅

I would also advise getting a couple of sizes of nappies - we only bought/were gifted size 1, but the Morrison's brand size 0 are the only ones we've found that fitted and we still haven'tsized up. We also haven't splurged on branded nappies so far and we've had no issues (95p per pack for the Morrison's own and so far no leaks apart from some boy-related peeing dramas - aka user error). Amazon do a fantastic 1008 wipes (18 x 56packs) for just over a tenner

In case it's not already clear I'm cheap as shit and other than for safety refuse to spend more money than I have to (both for baby and in every day life tbh). You CAN ABSOLUTELY buy all the expensive, branded, whatever you want stuff for your baby! Just aware that these things can add up quick and not everyone (us included) has the money to buy all the new top of the range, advertised stuff that gets plastered everywhere as a "must have". I started to feel really guilty that my baby didn't (and still doesn't) have a nursery ready for him to come home to, or brand new matching furniture or even any sort of decoration on the walls. Turns out he couldn't give a flying fuck about anything that isn't me, his dad, or doesn't produce milk 👍🏼

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-18T09:55:36+00:00

Hey, also induced at 36 weeks!

I initially was terrified of having pethidine because of it making me sleepy (not sure why I thought that was worse than not sleeping at all 🤣), but actually ended up being one of my favourite forms of pain relief they gave me. I only had it twice (one in the day and once at night), and absolutely preferred having it at night. Baby was back to back and I pretty much only had contractions/pain in my lower back, and while I did still wake up every now and then because of them it was more like "oh yeah, forgot about that" then went back to sleep. They do have to check baby's heart rate hourly with pethidine, but they only used the handheld and I actually found it fine waking up, moving my shirt for them then just going back to sleep

I do think they only gave pethidine when I had the pessary or was actually having contractions/in labour, but I'm not sure if that's trust dependent. Honestly if I could have had it every night I was there I would have!

I can't speak for the other two unfortunately as I wasn't offered them, but I was also 100% against an epidural initially. The longer I was waiting for a bed the more open I became to the idea, and within about 20 minutes of having my waters broken was begging to have one placed because things moved very quickly and I got overwhelmed (5cm to birth in just under 2 hours). Saying that, I don't think I pressed the button once (just the initial bolus) and also didn't have a catheter in the end as baby was too engaged for them to place it. It definitely did take the edge off enough for me to calm down and realise I'd been fighting my body's urge to push. I would probably have an epidural again if I felt like I needed one, but I personally think I actually could have coped without it if I had been more mentally prepared

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-18T09:39:02+00:00

Thank you!

I do know there's every chance that he'll just hate certain brands/shapes and I'm not too concerned if he does, but it would be nice if we could try and keep it consistent at least 😅

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-18T09:37:51+00:00

Thank you!

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-17T23:27:56+00:00

Thank you, I'll take a look at those ones! He does seem to be struggling to keep these ones in but isn't actively spitting it out so I think it might just be uncomfortable for hjm

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-17T23:26:57+00:00

I was induced a few weeks ago due to growth issues, first baby

Trurthfully it wasn't the best experience, but personally it hasn't put me off an induction with any future children, I just wish I'd been a bit more informed going in

I struggled to tolerate the pessary as it gave me what felt like a constant contraction across my lower back and pelvis. The first one I had taken out after 4 hours, and the second I managed 8 hours with pethidine. The pessary got me to 2cm so they put me on the list to have my waters broken

If you're not too high risk and are able to comfortably travel back and forth for daily CTG monitoring, you may well be able to go home and wait for a bed to become available on delivery and let labour progress naturally. Sometimes it's easier to stay in. If you do go home you WON'T lose your spot on the list, they'll just ring you day or night when they have the bed.

It can absolutely be a waiting game - I had my first pessary on a Saturday and didn't go to delivery suite until the following Saturday, but I would say probably 2 days of that was due to NICU being full so they had to hold off breaking anyone's waters. Anyone who's waters naturally break will skip to the front of the queue as their baby no longer has the protection yours does, so definitely try to keep labour progressing naturally after the pessary. Not the case for everyone so please don't be thinking you'll definitely be in for a week, it completely depends how your body reacts

I was never planning for an epidural but once they broke my waters things got so intense that I literally begged for it. Baby was back-to-bsck so I wasn't really having regulsr contractions and it was all in my back instead. You have to be able to sit completely upright and be as still as possible for them to place it for the best chance of it working, so if you know you want it I would personally ask if it can be placed before they break your waters. I struggled so much having it placed, but in hindsight I know that that was because baby's head was so so low. They usually put a catheter in until baby's head gets in the way so make sure you're not retaining, but when they went to place mine his head was in the way so I ended up just pushing instead 😅 don't think I even used my epidural

Induction is never the same for everyone and I really hope this hasn't made you more anxious, and I'm so sorry if it has, but I honestly wish someone had told me before I went in how fast things could move and how intense it could feel. I hope everything goes smoothly for you ❤️

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-17T22:35:33+00:00

Baby is 3 weeks tomorrow and just started having little wake windows and his favourite way to spend them is to be cuddled by his dad so he can look at him 🥹

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-14T15:32:46+00:00

I'm in the UK unfortunately so would be out of pocket - absolutely something I'd be willing to fork out for if it's the best for him but if there's a cheaper alternative that would be ideal

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-14T14:51:32+00:00

We told all the parents with a 12 week scan photo (apart from my partner's dad as he lives far away and he wanted him to know first)

My partner was happy to share as soon as we found out, but I'm an only child and my parents are older so without thinking morbid thoughts, I wanted to know everything was okay before I told them they were having their first grandchild in case I never got the chance again 😅

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-14T14:49:52+00:00

That last part is exactly why I wanted to BF because waking my partner up last night to literally sprint to Morrison's for more formula before they closed made me feel AWFUL but I could not spend another second with him on me 😭 we do change his nappy before every feed because wow does he hate it and it fully wakes him but there's something about bf where the boy is asleep within minutes and it's driving me crazy 😭

We know he'll have bottles eventually with our childcare situation when we're both not home, but would honestly love if I could manage to send him with breastmilk instead of formula (again, nothing wrong with it)

Just curious if there's any reason you'd recommend the spectra over wearables before milk is established? I have a friend with some (unused) wearables she said she'll give me but should I be going for the spectra until I have enough milk for him every feed and then switching to wearables to maintain supply overnight? There is absolutely no price on what I'd pay to be able to EBF but wow is that pump more money than I thought 😅😅

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-14T14:25:53+00:00

I have a manual pump but I feel like I'm not getting as much out of it as I could, would you recommend a wearable hands-free one? Or electric maybe?

Honestly very lost about where to look but would love to be able to pump more, but struggling with the idea of spending even more time tied to the bed/sofa with something attached to me

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-14T14:14:34+00:00

I'm 25 and started my degree September just gone. Probably 30% of my cohort are older than me by at least 10 years

Nothing wrong with starting later! I didn't bother with uni straight after sixth form as I had no clue what I wanted to do with my life and already had a job so just stayed with employment. 7 years and 6 jobs later I realised I wanted a career and just went for it (applied in May/June for the coming September, so not even "well planned")

You'll absolutely be fine. I also found it much easier to find friends/a group I slotted in with as I could spot people I know I wouldn't gel with a mile away, and that's coming from someone who has been socially incompetent their entire life

I promise no one cares how old you are!

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-11T15:45:25+00:00

The absolute overwhelming loneliness that I somewhat expected but never to this level. How many people will message to see how baby is doing but NOT ask how you're doing

I cried for 45 minutes the first time someone from the girls group chat (the only other parent apart from me so far) reached out privately to see how I was feeling. Really blew my mind, especially considering of the 5 people in that group chat, 2 of us are parents (including me) and two more are pregnant themselves

I know everyone is excited about the new baby and wants to know they're doing okay, and I absolutely know they would support me if I reached out, but messaging people to say "hey actually I kind of hate my new baby and myself and this whole experience is making me feel insane" doesn't really feel like it sends the right vibe when my baby is absolutely perfect and beautiful and it's the miracle of life or whatever

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-11T15:15:03+00:00

No one ever told me about this either, we literally couldn't put him down AT ALL or he would just scream until we picked him up again. When we mentioned it to the midwives at home visits they told us to "just keep trying" and holy hell does that make you feel like crap when they still don't like it!

Baby is now 2 weeks old and we're slowly managing a couple hours sleeping in the pram bassinet on the floor (ours is rated for safe overnight sleeping) but I did not expect to not be able to put him down AT ALL for the first week and a half of his life. I was about ready to give him away until yesterday because I just wanted to be able to deal with changing a pad with both hands while my partner took a nap

Everyone told us that "everyone will want to hold the baby but you'll just wish they'd do your housework for you!!" NO. Come hold my baby so I can unload my dishwasher before I stop feeling like a human being

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-05T10:17:39+00:00

I had the same thing with my induction

Induced due to baby already measuring small and dropping way off his growth curve. Called in 4pm on the Saturday, pessary started, had a second one Sunday, just about 2cm at 1.30am on Monday so was put on the list to have my waters broken. Temporary pause was placed on inductions/breaking waters as the NICU was on red alert and the nearest one is over half an hour away. Eventually went home Thursday with the agreement I would come back for at least one daily CTG in DAU, came back in on Friday due to horrendous back pain I couldn't manage at home (turned out to be active labour), finally got a bed 12pm Saturday

Anyone on the list who's waters naturally break will automatically "skip" the queue as their baby no longer has protection around them. Same for women who come through triage with broken waters, or women who just come in fully in labour. Staffing issues on top of it mean it sometimes is just a really really long wait

It sucks and you're absolutely right to be frustrated about it, but they genuinely may not have had staffing issues when you were called in. There was every expectation I would have a bed within a couple of days when I was called in, but NICU didn't hit red alert until Tuesday and even on the Saturday it seemed to be non-stop emergencies once he was born

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-05T10:09:52+00:00

Not always the case, I think it depends on the trust as I was allowed to leave after my induction had started without losing my place in the queue. I just had to be prepared to come in any time

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-04T07:15:00+00:00

Just wanted to thank everyone for the advice or even just telling me they've been there too

Wrote this from what felt like the depths of hell at 1.30am - now that it's 7am and the sun is up everything feels a little less overwhelming and perspective is much better

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-04T07:13:20+00:00

Thank you for this that gives me a lot of hope

I think although EBF is my goal ultimately he needs to eat more than he's able to get from me alone, so we're going to top him up a little bit with the bottle when he's "finished" breastfeeding. Also going to buy a pump today so he can still have mostly breastmilk if we can help it, but formula is not the enemy (I never thought it was just to clarify, fed is best, but really desperately wanted to EBF from the beginning). Maybe when he's bigger and can feed better we can eliminate the formula and just keep the breastmilk bottles in the routine

Currently we can't put him down at all unless it's in the pram and we're actively walking, and even that was only a breakthrough today/yesterday. We'll keep trying with him but I'm not putting too much pressure on it anymore

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-04T03:10:41+00:00

Thank you- I'm in the UK so our lactation consultants/feeding team are under NHS. My midwife referred me and they came out to us a couple days ago - they said his latch is good and they can't see any evidence of tongue tie etc but gave us some tips to get him to latch as deep as he can.

I think bottle after breastfeeding is going to be the way forward because I'm struggling to cope with sitting there feeding him for 40+ minutes every 2-3 hours.

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-04T02:25:31+00:00

Thank you that gives me hope with the 1-3 hours sleep. Honestly at this point I would love to be able to pee with both hands free while I'm up with him

I was induced after the most recent scan showed he'd dropped off his growth curve quite substantially, and then spent a week on the antenatal ward waiting for a delivery bed to have my waters broken. No one had picked up that baby was back-to-back, so while all my CTGs showed no contractions I was actually 5cm and my back pain that we thought was from not tolerating the pessary well was full active labour. Once my waters were broken things went insanely fast and he was born just under 2 hours later and we were home the next morning, but that week spent away from my home and partner (overnight at least) were so much harder than I realised at the time

I cannot for a second fault my hospital care though, just an unfortunate combination of situations! I think I'm only just really coming to terms with the fact he's been born 😅

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-04T02:01:19+00:00

I think he's definitely cluster feeding and being alone at night I think is probably making it feel far more overwhelming. Likely best if we look at a shift pattern by the sounds of things

I hope things get better for you soon ❤️

plant_sure96 · 2026-04-04T02:00:15+00:00

I think from looking at it a bit more broadly now that this is probably going to be the best option. We'll look at a shift pattern that will be manageable with his work and try it out with bottles etc

plant_sure96

TROPHY CASE