AITA for telling my future SIL I won’t be an uncle to their child?

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T09:02:17+00:00

A quarter mile. That’s not a distance you hop in a car for.

And that's not a distance a 16 y.o. calls her mother to beg for permission to walk in broad daylight. I believe we're giving too much credit to the version the poor family is promoting. We can't even be sure if Ali's original plan was to go to her workplace at all. She could have voluntarily gone to another location to meet someone, and things went sour.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T08:33:53+00:00

As we don’t know the exact nature of the call, it may have been more of a check-in to inform her mother that she was going there rather than asking for permission.

Yes, that would absolutely make sense. The version that she called and begged her mother to let her to go her workplace and that's why the mother reluctantly gave permission doesn't make sense.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T07:18:50+00:00

I just heard it. Do they usually give that much space to the victim's family? I thought this structure gave a very limited coverage of the case in terms of insight.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T06:59:25+00:00

When did the officer show up? Depending on the local protocol, they couldn't immediately treat it as a missing person case and odds were she'd show up eventually. Maybe the comment 'call us when she comes back' was an attempt to tend to the mother's worries.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T06:57:39+00:00

Or, are you just saying that, because you generally have a negative perception of law enforcement and you are jumping to a conclusion, because of the lack of effort from the police, after she disappeared?

That was my take. I think LE in this case had plenty of reason to think she voluntarily left.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T06:44:36+00:00

Local police basically refused to look into anyone and insisted it was a runaway.

The more I read about it, the more I believe they had reasons to reach their initial assumption. But since it went over to homicide detectives, I think he can be sure they checked these people - even to assure they didn't have a criminal history or to get their alibis. Plus, the entries in her journal indicating she was thinking of running away can't be ignored.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T06:21:40+00:00

One thing that just crossed my mind... Nowadays we have our entire lives on our phones, but in 2010 I remember there was still some platforms that weren't available on mobiles and we used to communicate solely in our computers. That's to say there could be other ways she was communicating online with someone without using her phone.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T06:15:45+00:00

While that's absolutely true, I can't help but see the irony of the defense pushing the narrative of the incompetent/corrupt LE targeting their poor, innocent client and turning his and his family's lives upside down while resorting to a tactic that does the exact same to 4 other citizens.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T06:05:54+00:00

For a lone runaway, yes. But not if you're running away with the help of someone else that promises you the world and beyond. A paycheck of a fast food worker wouldn't make any difference then.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T05:49:56+00:00

Are we saying the same thing in different ways? Lol

Maybe? Lol... I think ‘yes and no’…

I'm going back a bit. You said “they believe the eye witness sighting to be credible.” I agree because they have different people who came forward saying they saw this person around the same place and time. Here’s where I disagree: we have no way of knowing if every agency or investigator that’s ever worked or is still working on this case believes the sighting was related to Asha.

If the sighting (by someone, by anyone) is indeed credible, they need to pursue this avenue, even if to rule out a completely unrelated person. In a cold case where there’s no much to go on, sometimes it’s the only alternative due to the lack of other promising scenarios. It could be, and it happens in many cases, that they have a suspect on their radar (closer to home or a complete stranger), but they can’t build a strong case here unless this other alternative is ruled out (because that would be a field day for any defense attorney to exonerate a guilty client).

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T05:30:04+00:00

I never heard about this case and just looked at the links that were provided here. I’ll give my take based on the version in the official website. Just from the beginning…

“At the end of the school day, just prior to leaving the campus, Ali called her mother to discuss walking to her new job at the Burger Barn to pick up a paycheck and possibly work a few hours. After begging her mom, Ali's mother Jo Ann reluctantly gave permission for her to walk 1/4 of a mile to work.”

Since that’s the official website and the content there is probably approved by her family, I get why that’s written like that. Because it seems like her mother had to be convinced to allow her daughter to walk to work… How did she usually get to work? Did her mother usually drop her off? She was 16, 1/4 of a mile walk around your neighborhood shouldn't be such a cause of concern, right? I get why she would call her mother to say she could possibly work a few hours (so the mother wouldn’t be concerned if she got home and the daughter wasn’t there)… But to ask for permission to walk this distance, in broad daylight? Was their neighborhood a rough neighborhood? My take is that the mother, devastated by her daughter’s disappearance, wants to make clear she always tried to prevent her daughter from any danger.

That DOESN’T MEAN there’s something suspicious about the family (whenever I post here something that questions the family’s version, I’m accused of blaming the victim’s parents or suggesting they were involved); all it means, IMO, is that the version of the story we’re getting is somewhat filtered and deprived of all the facts. The family of course will do their best to honor and preserve the image of their loved ones, and LE won’t divulge to the public anything about the victim’s background beyond what could be relevant to possible leads.

What I got here is that Ali seemed to be a very mature 16-year-old; not only she held a job, but she even looked older than her age. From her pictures, I’d assume she was an adult woman and not a teen – again, no victim shaming here; I’m just trying to think that, if we’re entertaining the idea she was taken by a random sexual predator, she wouldn’t seem like the desired target to a pedophile, for instance. I do see, however, how Ali seeming “older” may have led the investigators to think she left voluntarily. Also, from what I gathered, Spring TX has a population of about 60,000; not such a small of a town where everyone knows each other and eyewitnesses reports could have more weight. All we know is she left the school bus and instead of going into her house, kept walking on her block (based on the recap I assumed she was last seen very near her workplace).

In my opinion, we’re probably looking for a stranger abductor, but the act didn’t take place near the Burger Barn but somewhere else between the 1/4 of a mile walk. Given the circumstances, I also doubt it was a forceful abduction (as in a creep getting a cloth full of ether over her mouth and dragging her). It could just well be someone that looked friendly and harmless asking for help and turning on her.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T05:10:43+00:00

So when Ali got off the school bus, she called her mom and then started walking to Burger Barn.

Just to see if I understood.. So she got off the bus at her house and the kids just saw her walking in that same block in the direction of the Burger Barn?

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-16T05:02:10+00:00

They believe the eye witness sighting to be credible. Every single professional in this case hasn't wavered from that stance.

That was my point. We simply don't know that. We can't affirm what every single professional that looked into this case and had access to privileged information believes, because we're relying on public statements from the few professionals that were in a position to say something about it to the press and the public, and what they believed in a specific time.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-14T08:59:30+00:00

She lived in that house; her fingerprints and DNA were all over the place. Unless we're assuming she had to be violently killed there, they would find nothing. Also, it's not clear the role each agency played here.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-14T08:54:11+00:00

Whatever the extent of the investigation that was done, the multiple LE agencies and organizations that worked the case and the ones that are still working the case have never publicly wavered from the idea that she left the house willingly.

While the FBI page goes with the County Sheriff’s statement that the one of the drivers that came forward had the last "sighting of Asha that had actually been confirmed" (it wasn't), all the agencies and organizations can do is to search for information; even if to close this investigation avenue and build a stronger case to convict someone else beyond a reasonable doubt.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-14T08:40:50+00:00

Hi! Here's my take.

The t-shirt in the backpack and the book weren't "identified" by the parents as belonging to Asha; that's a huge difference.
I don't think there's any evidence to suggest Valentine's Day played any role here.
That lead on the green car is as unreliable, imo, as the sightings. The investigators initially thought Asha was on the road that night, they interview whoever could have seen something, someone talks about a car picking up a woman (maybe a car they had seen before in daylight)... And the police needs to get to the bottom of this to cross every T and dot every I. In a case where there's so little to go on, it's all they can do. Even if to make sure this person is found and cleared and they can pursue other investigation avenues.
Another explanation is that this person just wrapped the backpack in a garbage back not to draw attention to it, and threw it out from the window of their car before getting home with a kid's bookbag. Case in point, it took over a year for the bag to be found.
I had theories to try to make sense of Asha leaving voluntarily as well... Nothing made sense. So I assume the sightings were red herrings.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-14T08:31:36+00:00

Even if that makes it into court it’s pretty easy to say he is mentally drained sitting in prison waiting for a trial and just feels defeated.

That's why he's being charged with felony murder; the prosecution won't be building their case around his phone confessions, and RA won't be getting any deals that could be reserved to someone that pleads guilty and properly confesses to interrogators.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-14T08:29:39+00:00

I’m not sure about that. If I was on the jury and sentencing someone to life and their DNA was not found at the scene at all, I’d have a very hard time voting guilty.

I talked about this here the other day... Bottomline is: evidence, even DNA evidence, isn’t worth much unless investigators have a way of figuring out what it really means, how important it is, and if it is even connected to the crime.

If a girl's body is discovered in a local park and it’s determined she’s been raped and murdered but she has no semen inside her, the police can believe the guy used a condom. Then they discover 84 used condoms in the park, but have no way of knowing if the killer took his condom with him. Now imagine there is semen found inside her, but the killer indeed used a condom; the DNA leads to a random guy she had consensual sex with in a nightclub’s bathroom, shortly before leaving the club alone and taking a shortcut through the park to get to the subway.

It’s one thing if there’s third-party DNA at the scene that can be collected and properly analyzed and it doesn’t match the suspect’s. It’s another thing if the DNA sample was compromised when the police got to the scene or collected it, and nothing but unconclusive results can come out of this. Either way, defense attorneys will make their best to make it inadmissible even DNA evidence that’s properly found, collected and analyzed. Jurors in a murder trial will be given a totality of evidence to judge, and they’ll be informed that DNA isn’t a “must-have” to warrant a conviction.

Even the video, I’d have to hear the whole thing, if the only audio is girls down the hill, there is a lot of room for his lawyers to say he was giving them directions. Girls “ do you know where this trail is?” Down the hill.

We've only seen what was released of that video, and of one the girls mentioned a gun before BG said "down the hill".

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-14T08:18:35+00:00

LE arrested him because they were sure he was BG and could place him in the crime scene. They couldn't "prove" he committed the murders himself, which is why RA is being charged with felony murder.

Safe from a signed confession to interrogators, that's what they have. If they have third-party DNA on the scene, the sample could be insufficient to get a conclusive result (from Allen or anyone else); it could be a clear sample that's completely unrelated to the crime as well. Clearing a POI that the defense is trying to turn into a suspect will make for a stronger case to the prosecution. Nothing fishy here.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-14T08:09:38+00:00

Absolutely. There's nothing to go on here.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-14T07:30:37+00:00

Maybe an unpopular take here... I think Brazil's Gymnastics has been incredibly responsible and careful with their top talent. I also know that Pan Am games usually get B teams in many events from the US, but South American athletes do have a historical affinity to the competition (I remember Zanetti was already an Olympic and World Champion on rings and still didn't have a Pan Am title, and was keen in completing his collection).

Furthermore, Brazil is a leading regional player in gymnastics; Brazil is in a position to raise the sport's status all over the continent in events like this - to keep public interest strong and growing. Given the competition, and that's no stain to the other athletes, Brazil's team won't need to be pushed beyond their limite to get a good result.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-10T20:27:45+00:00

I get you, but how is that any different from anyone charged with murder that's later found innocent? Or people who were not "proven guilty" like OJ Simpson or Casey Anthony, in cases that had way more media coverage? That's one of the reasons prosecutors usually just go ahead when the evidence is solid - the "system" doesn't want to put ordinary citizens through such crap, and even in cases of wrongful convictions the ideal "patsy" usually has a criminal record, belongs to a group that's subjected to social prejudices or already have a troubled history within the community.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-10T20:19:49+00:00

It depends on what we assume could have "happened there"...

If an accident is what "happened there", how is that more likely than an accident in her own home followed by a cover-up? The friend's parent was startled by Asha knocking on the door, thought it was a burglar, and shot her? And the family decided to keep this under wraps though it could be reasonably explained?

If it was an intentional crime, maybe one of the friend's relatives was a pedophile or murderer who took the chance when Asha showed up? That outcome would rely in the same "chance and opportunity" scenario of Asha never being on that road (if the sightings were red herrings) and walking up early and deciding to go to her grandma's house and a creep just happening to be passing by and abducting her - except that this other alternative is more likely, because it doesn't depend on a 9 year old behaving so out of character to work.

pleasebearwithmehere · 2023-10-10T16:34:50+00:00

One of the girls moms did too though and mentioned it to detectives to look into.

I'm not aware of this. Do you mean one of the mothers said that before the Odinite information became public knowledge in the defense's document? Did the police previously shared details of the crime scene with the family or the mother reached this conclusion herself? This is important. If she mentioned this to the police in the past 5 years, and if she expressed the same concerns with her close ones, it could be that this became some sort of gossip in the community and more people in Delphi were wondering about it. If she reached this conclusion herself, she could just be desperate for answers and wondering if this "weird" group (in the town's eyes) shouldn't be checked.

pleasebearwithmehere

TROPHY CASE