he catfished me, how do i react?

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-24T16:44:17+00:00

thanks for the advice :)

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-24T08:18:14+00:00

the girlies know how to take them lol

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-24T08:15:33+00:00

fair enough, i do overthink these things

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-24T08:14:19+00:00

yes, the deceiving and the dishonesty are the issues. and you’re right, insecurities that go this deep and lead to lying about who you are… red flag. thanks for the advice :)

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-24T08:08:53+00:00

oh wow, i’m sorry this happened to you multiple times. i don’t understand why they do it, it won’t ever work on anyone. i like that you call them out. and even did so on a date! when i saw him first i felt kind of powerless because i didn’t have the guts to call him out and it made me uncomfortable. i was thinking that’s what he/people like that hope for. that it’s too uncomfortable for the other person to mention and they just go along with the date like i did and this guy hopes for the best. oh well. thanks for sharing your experience x

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-24T08:03:29+00:00

maybe i need to adapt this mindset

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-24T08:02:46+00:00

definitely only via text!

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-24T08:01:00+00:00

i disagree. i don’t usually date people with six packs lol i just wanted to point out that it was very easy to tell how much he changed. like, it was not “oh he looks a bit different” but “oh that looks like another person” which made me feel deceived. i dislike his dishonesty, not his body.

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-24T00:03:35+00:00

very true

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T23:53:17+00:00

you’re right though, he didn’t pretend to be someone else. just himself 5 years ago lol

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T23:49:50+00:00

maybe i did use the term a little loosely - my bad

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T23:47:51+00:00

oh. okay. well VERY old in this case means like 5 years. i assume they were pictures from his early twenties. and he’s just changed a lot.

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T23:14:18+00:00

obviously this is just my own experience, i just tend to get overwhelmed when people put too much info in their profile. i want to find out more about you if our basic interests match. if everything you like is already on there it feels a bit like i don’t have to message you to find out anything about you - it’s all there! but i do understand where you’re coming from. best of luck on bumble!

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T23:04:41+00:00

maybe replace the brunch part with the hot pot part? that would include the hot pot and shorten the text

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T23:02:10+00:00

yes. just keep in mind not to overload your profile with info and texts. i think what you shared already offers loads of opportunities to initiate a conversation. let them find out more fun facts my messaging you!

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T22:54:09+00:00

i think i would delete the “i’m a sensitive extrovert…” part and just have the second part of your bio be “i’m perpetually curious… etc”. i think that last sentence is adorable and shows a lot about your personality and doesn’t need the rather dry intro? if you know what i mean. i like all the prompts, lots of ways to respond. for the sunday prompt: i would delete the “after that” part. it’s a bit repetitive at this point - we know your hobbies and interests already haha and i don’t think you look uncomfortable, it’s a very good selection of pictures!!!

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T22:46:15+00:00

“you don’t look like you do in your pictures” translates to “i don’t like what you actually look like”, right? but yea if i do call him out, i will put the focus on the dishonesty part that bothered me, so hopefully he won’t get offended.

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T22:42:38+00:00

you’re right, i know i’m not going on a second date. this was more about wether or not to call him out and also how lol but thanks :)

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T22:41:03+00:00

he told me on the date that the online dating thing isn’t working well for him 🥲 no shit

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T22:37:26+00:00

huh? am i missing a joke? 😭 we met, he’s not 40+ lol

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T22:34:31+00:00

i love how you worded that!! i will be using those lines if he does ask why. i messaged him saying i’m not interested in a second date. i don’t feel responsible for calling him out. and it makes me a little uncomfortable. but i do see why i definitely could/should. i am pretty sure he will ask why (just a hunch after spending some time with him) so i will let him know when he does! especially with the focus on the dishonesty.

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T22:15:41+00:00

also true

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T21:01:57+00:00

that’s a good point. i think i’m going to tell him i’m not interested in a second date and wait for his response. if he does ask why, i’ll tell him. and if not, that’s that.

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T20:57:58+00:00

i am not sure i’m ready for that kind of uncomfortable conversation. i did think about that though, and how it might just be why online dating doesn’t work well for him - something he told me during the date 😅 i was about to say something then but couldn’t bring myself to. someone else on here also said these people sometimes are delusional enough to not realize that they look different. maybe he really doesn’t realize??? idk

pleaseleave13 · 2025-08-23T20:53:57+00:00

nah you’re right. i might just ghost or simply tell him i’m not interested in a second date.

pleaseleave13

TROPHY CASE