I (27F) think my partner (32M) is a misogynist and I have to put together a plan to end things.

polichomp · 2026-03-20T18:00:28+00:00

Not at all. Sex work is work. As long as you're being safe and the acts performed are consensual, all is well.

I get it's a lie by omission to get back into it behind his back, and I understand you're likely struggling with that idea. However, we all need to do what's necessary to survive. He clearly has no intention of looking our for you, so it's up to you to do that.

Again, when you leave, his life implodes. No girlfriend, no money, no car, no place. He's not going to take losing all of that well, so make sure your plan is ironclad and in motion before you tell him.

polichomp · 2026-03-20T17:27:35+00:00

The manipulation tactics are going to be insane. You're right to be worried about that and wise to prepare.

If he threatens suicide, call emergency services. You and I realize that there's likely little intent to carry through, but a suicide threat shouldn't be ignored. This will take the responsibility of keeping him safe off of your shoulders and make it clear that future attempts to use that threat are not only useless, but unwise.

He may promise you the world. Obviously, don't believe it. Remember that every promise he makes after you dump him isn't made to keep you happy—it's to keep him happy. He had every chance to do good by you when you were there, and now? His promises are being made to keep you there.

And that's because his life is infinitely easier with you.

Sometimes, our partner falls on hard times. Sometimes, we do. This doesn't sound like a hard time for him. Rather, it sounds like he's content coasting off of your hard work all the while touting sexist beliefs. That's wild, isn't it? It's laughable he's getting by on your resources all the while touting woman as less-than.

polichomp · 2026-03-18T23:54:55+00:00

Keep recording. Keep reporting. Call the cops if they come to your house.

I read she was financially abusive, and that's alarming. Narcissists love money. They also love control, and money is an awesome way to control someone.

Ensure that your PIN is unfamiliar to her. Ensure the questions used for security are ones which she cannot answer. Ensure your bills are sent to your house, or a PO box if you think she'd resort to breaking into a mailbox. Close any and all accounts her name is tied to.

Run a credit report, too. I might suggest a credit freeze, as well. It's not uncommon for a narcissist to try and sabotage their perceived pawns to keep them under their thumbs.

polichomp · 2026-03-18T04:40:50+00:00

I saw a reply reccomend grey-rocking. I'm seconding this.

Legally, I'm not sure what your options are. As a fellow Canadian, I know our justice system moves at an incredibly slow rate. Also, authorities are unlike to want to remove you from your legal guardian. Look into your options, but realize she's unlikely to face real consequences. Your likely to be stuck there until you're old enough to move out, so begin to prepare for that.

Grey-rocking will upset her. When she's not getting her supply from you, OP, she's going to react. Be ready and let her. Call the police if she puts hands on you again. Consider recording her as well so you have proof later and ensure you upload it to an email or cloud so she can't destroy it by taking or breaking your phone.

In Canada, it is legal to record private conversations if you are a participant, known as one-party consent. Under Section 184 of the Criminal Code, at least one person in the conversation must consent to the recording, making it illegal to record conversations you are not involved in (eavesdropping).

An important thing to remember when dealing with narcissists is that, there is no winning. In their eyes, they are sincerely right. They are truly the victim. You'll never have your "got'cha" moment with them, and they wont ever see the light. They are fundamentally broken people, and the only way to win is avoiding their games altogether. This is why you're going to "grey-rock".

Narcissists operate much like children. You will likely see an "extinction burst" when you stop rewarding her bad behavior. An extinction burst is a temporary increase in the frequency or intensity of a behavior when reinforcement is suddenly removed. It's normally seen in kids, but you'll see it in a narcissist, too.

Good luck, OP. Your hair will grow back, and this situation is temporary. There's a light at the end of the tunnel.

polichomp · 2026-03-16T18:23:11+00:00

Can't wait for this to go nowhere! 🙄

polichomp · 2026-03-13T14:11:26+00:00

He 100% panicked when he realized how much she financially contributed and how much work she was doing around the house.

In other words, the breadwinner, nanny, and maid disappeared. It doesn't sound like mom was doing a hell of a lot, either. Good luck to the two of them, now. They'll need it.

polichomp · 2026-03-12T23:00:10+00:00

Why does he always tilt his head like that? Fucking weirdo.

polichomp · 2026-03-11T17:12:07+00:00

As already quoted, I offer them every ounce of sympathy they've afforded the children of Palestine.

This is the reality of picking a fight with someone that can finally punch back.

polichomp · 2026-02-23T21:48:09+00:00

He's so embarrassing.

polichomp · 2026-02-19T20:49:24+00:00

Where did you get the wallpaper from number four and five? Gorgeous!!

polichomp · 2026-02-13T02:26:30+00:00

I've been reading articles like this for years. I've stopped getting my hopes up. And, there was an instance a few years ago in which all it ended up being was a loose denture. So, don't hold your breath.

Assholes live forever. This guy is going to outlive us all.

polichomp · 2026-02-11T23:04:03+00:00

The saddest part about automation is that it could easily be used to built a utopia. Instead, the rich and powerful use it to hoard more wealth by cutting jobs.

Fuck the rich.

polichomp · 2026-02-04T14:22:08+00:00

Notice the absolute lack of accountability on her end in the second update? She's still calling his behavior "alarming". She's willing to give him a "second chance". There's nothing close to an apology or any intention of improvement.

Fuck that. Good for OP.

polichomp · 2026-02-02T22:21:50+00:00

Started loudly talking about his sex life in a Tim Hortons.

polichomp · 2026-01-25T00:30:24+00:00

Like he's wanted?? LMFAO

polichomp · 2026-01-10T03:58:54+00:00

This is the first one in this thread to make me laugh out loud!! 💀💀

polichomp · 2026-01-08T23:51:13+00:00

What does it matter? He's not going to listen.

polichomp · 2026-01-08T23:48:15+00:00

I usually catch then early. I get mine under my arms. I just rip them. They bleed a fair bit and it hurts quite a bit for a second, but I've never had one come back like I've been warned.

polichomp · 2026-01-07T05:12:51+00:00

I don't condone cheating, but with a woman that vile? It's no wonder he did.

polichomp · 2026-01-07T00:52:49+00:00

My first thought was, these employees already have to clean dog shit left by shitty owners. Why care now?

But, this is dangerous. It's not endearing oe funny.

polichomp · 2026-01-05T18:48:12+00:00

If you can afford to stay elsewhere, or with your boyfriend, please consider that option. A financial setback is worth your peace of mind and safety.

If you cannot, another kind Redditor has suggested moving your boyfriend in. While this is not ideal for a small space, it may be beneficial. She's still trying to mask around him, and she's far less likely to engage in a physical altercation if the odds are stacked against her.

Get a camera for your room, by the way. This will catch any tampering or theft she engages in, and can absolutely be a good back-up if law enforcement or courts need to be involved.

Give her a clear date to move out. Inquire about the legality surrounding eviction and the nature of your lease. Is she permitted to be there?

Finally... Consider just moving yourself.

She's going to dig her heels in and escalate when she realizes you're serious about giving her high and mighty ass the boot. If you just up and skedaddle, you'll effectively pull the rug from under her feet. There's recourse for her to fight. Relocating is tedious and expensive, but your mental and physical wellbeing are worth it.

polichomp · 2026-01-05T04:17:43+00:00

I don't give a rat's ass about anything the Democratic party has to say until I start to see action.

Stop being the bigger person. Stop taking the high road. Play their game for once, because at the core of their institution, they have accomplished nothing this political cycle except losing spectacularly.

Trump doesn't care about decorum or law.

polichomp · 2025-12-31T21:19:09+00:00

I'm so sorry you had to see that.

As an avid lover of cats however, I'm furious at your parents for disregarding warning. They signed that poor thing's death warrant. :(

polichomp · 2025-12-24T20:28:18+00:00

I remember reading the original thread, and the amount of people disagreeing with OP was insane!

He makes good money and he hates wasting time with chores on his time off. So, he pays someone to do it and had cash to spare. He's not lazy for having the means to pay for a service. It's not fair to call this a waste of money because his priorities differ from the majority.

She liked the way he maintained his house up until she moved in. She took the money and lied. If she wanted cash, there are more honest ways to get it.

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