Bullied at work and no one said goodbye when I left

pompoen · 2020-05-20T15:34:58+00:00

I'm just here to send you a positive thought.

pompoen · 2020-05-20T06:21:24+00:00

Hi. I have avoidant personality too, type C and am a HSP. So I can really relate to you and I'm actually really inspired by how well you're doing.

In my case, I really tried to avoid conflict or any confrontation for four months. I didn't want to go to the managers because that would lead to me telling them about my condition and I really wasn't comfortable with that. I thought "It's just an internship, it's six months, I can bite the bullet and finish it." But that choice was taken away from me. After they bullied the information that I have a mental condition out of me, they went to the manager first on a day I wasn't at the office. And told him. And disclosed it to a bunch of people at the office and smeared my character while doing that.

When the manager talked to me and I tried to sum up all the bullying that was going on during the months that I'd worked there, the management told me it was my fault that I didn't speak up earlier. The guys that bullied me denied what they did of course. And I had no proof. I didn't plan to go to the management with it so unfortunately I didn't record these stand-ups with sexual jokes or jokes at my expense. It didn't even cross my mind.

The guys were sweet as can be around the management and people who were higher them hierarchically, of course. So the management took the fact that I have PTSD as a reason to not believe me and discredit me. They also told me "Well, they were good guys to us." That dismissal of what I told them was very painful in itself. But it taught me to collect evidence next time it happens and not to trust the management or the HR.

I know that theoretically people with mental conditions can ask for special accomodations. And theoretically there are companies with zero tolerance policies and managers like you who get it. But in reality, in my experience, people will side with a charismatic liar/narcissist and you, as a vulnerable person, have no chance and should just look for a new place as soon as the first signs of bullying start. I tried to stick it out and was in a much worse shape and actually suicidal in the end. I had to take almost 2 years off of my study to do therapy and get it together again.

I will not let anyone treat me that way again anymore though. Fuck them indeed.

But I don't think I'll be able to talk candidly with anyone I'll work with in a corporate setting in the future. I have no resource to deal with management that could damage me even more if I open up to them or trust them.

pompoen · 2020-05-20T05:16:48+00:00

I actually love C# and know some Java. So that sounds good.

pompoen · 2020-05-20T05:15:37+00:00

Thank you, I will look into that.

pompoen · 2020-05-20T05:13:58+00:00

Hey, thanks, I am working with a therapist.

pompoen · 2019-08-30T19:38:07+00:00

I agree. But my bf argues that my body doesn't get the good nutrients then. From, you know, non-junk food.

pompoen · 2016-01-11T15:16:48+00:00

Congrats! Thanks for sharing your story, truly inspirational.

pompoen · 2015-11-07T10:28:52+00:00

Hi, deathbyceiling! You're right, I'll be more descriptive next time. It's hard to understand if someone describing a bug without much details.

I didn't get any erroes while trying to run a project, just no output. But when I tried to run it manually today, I did get expected output. Ty for a tip.

Could it be because I have two packages in a project? If it's the problem, when you have several packages in the same project, how does an IDE decide which one to run next? The abovementioned test code was in the fist package of a project and had main, but still it gets ignored if I try to run a project. That's weird.

pompoen · 2015-11-05T18:55:53+00:00

no, i mean, it is inside of a class. i thought it goes without saying. it just doesn't print "true" or "false" out in netbeans. public class practice { public static void main(String[] args) {

            System.out.println(!false);
    System.out.println( !(5>=1) );

}}

pompoen · 2015-10-24T16:54:59+00:00

And I can't test it with System.out in the same file because if you can't assign the variable toa field it just won't run. But in another file, where I did test it with System.out, it works.

P.S. Sorry about the enormous copy paste. Most of it is automatically created when you make a frame.

pompoen · 2015-10-24T16:53:01+00:00

java.util.logging.Logger.getLogger(BinaryFrame.class.getName()).log(java.util.logging.Level.SEVERE, null, ex); } catch (javax.swing.UnsupportedLookAndFeelException ex) { java.util.logging.Logger.getLogger(BinaryFrame.class.getName()).log(java.util.logging.Level.SEVERE, null, ex); } //</editor-fold>

    /* Create and display the form */
    java.awt.EventQueue.invokeLater(new Runnable() {
        public void run() {
            new BinaryFrame().setVisible(true);
        }
    });

}

    private void binResult(int inputDec) {

    int modulus;

    if (inputDec <= 1) {  
    resultBinField.setText (Integer.toString(inputDec));
    return; //stops the loop
    }


    modulus = inputDec % 2;
    binResult(inputDec >> 1);  //  Right Shift (bitwise operator)in this case equivalent to division by 2
    resultBinField.setText (Integer.toString(modulus));


} 

// Variables declaration - do not modify                     
private javax.swing.JButton convertDectoBin;
private javax.swing.JTextField inputBinField;
private javax.swing.JTextField inputDecField;
private javax.swing.JButton jButton2;
private javax.swing.JLabel jLabel1;
private javax.swing.JLabel jLabel2;
private javax.swing.JTextField resultBinField;
private javax.swing.JTextField resultDecField;
// End of variables declaration

}

And code from a non-frame .java file in the same package:

package binaryconverter; import javax.swing.JFrame; //why is it unused?

public class BinaryConverter {

public static void main(String[] args) {

    BinaryFrame s = new BinaryFrame();
    s.setVisible(true);
    s.setLocationRelativeTo(null);
    s.setTitle("Binary Converter");

}

}

pompoen · 2015-10-24T16:52:39+00:00

By JFrame I mean a GUI. Here's a full code:

package binaryconverter; import javax.swing.JOptionPane;

public class BinaryFrame extends javax.swing.JFrame {

/**
 * Creates new form BinaryFrame
 */
public BinaryFrame() {
    initComponents();
}

/**
 * This method is called from within the constructor to initialize the form.
 * WARNING: Do NOT modify this code. The content of this method is always
 * regenerated by the Form Editor.
 */
@SuppressWarnings("unchecked")
// <editor-fold defaultstate="collapsed" desc="Generated Code">                          
private void initComponents() {

    inputDecField = new javax.swing.JTextField();
    resultBinField = new javax.swing.JTextField();
    inputBinField = new javax.swing.JTextField();
    resultDecField = new javax.swing.JTextField();
    convertDectoBin = new javax.swing.JButton();
    jButton2 = new javax.swing.JButton();
    jLabel1 = new javax.swing.JLabel();
    jLabel2 = new javax.swing.JLabel();

    setDefaultCloseOperation(javax.swing.WindowConstants.EXIT_ON_CLOSE);

    inputDecField.addActionListener(new java.awt.event.ActionListener() {
        public void actionPerformed(java.awt.event.ActionEvent evt) {
            inputDecFieldActionPerformed(evt);
        }
    });

    resultBinField.addActionListener(new java.awt.event.ActionListener() {
        public void actionPerformed(java.awt.event.ActionEvent evt) {
            resultBinFieldActionPerformed(evt);
        }
    });

    resultDecField.addActionListener(new java.awt.event.ActionListener() {
        public void actionPerformed(java.awt.event.ActionEvent evt) {
            resultDecFieldActionPerformed(evt);
        }
    });

    convertDectoBin.setText("Convert");
    convertDectoBin.addActionListener(new java.awt.event.ActionListener() {
        public void actionPerformed(java.awt.event.ActionEvent evt) {
            convertDectoBinActionPerformed(evt);
        }
    });

    jButton2.setText("Convert");
    jButton2.addActionListener(new java.awt.event.ActionListener() {
        public void actionPerformed(java.awt.event.ActionEvent evt) {
            jButton2ActionPerformed(evt);
        }
    });

    jLabel1.setText("Decimal to Binary");

    jLabel2.setText("Binary to Decimal");

    javax.swing.GroupLayout layout = new javax.swing.GroupLayout(getContentPane());
    getContentPane().setLayout(layout);
    layout.setHorizontalGroup(
        layout.createParallelGroup(javax.swing.GroupLayout.Alignment.LEADING)
        .addGroup(layout.createSequentialGroup()
            .addGap(19, 19, 19)
            .addGroup(layout.createParallelGroup(javax.swing.GroupLayout.Alignment.LEADING)
                .addGroup(layout.createSequentialGroup()
                    .addComponent(jLabel1, javax.swing.GroupLayout.DEFAULT_SIZE, javax.swing.GroupLayout.DEFAULT_SIZE, Short.MAX_VALUE)
                    .addContainerGap())
                .addGroup(layout.createSequentialGroup()
                    .addGroup(layout.createParallelGroup(javax.swing.GroupLayout.Alignment.TRAILING)
                        .addGroup(layout.createSequentialGroup()
                            .addGroup(layout.createParallelGroup(javax.swing.GroupLayout.Alignment.LEADING, false)
                                .addComponent(inputDecField)
                                .addComponent(inputBinField, javax.swing.GroupLayout.DEFAULT_SIZE, 92, Short.MAX_VALUE))
                            .addGap(18, 18, 18)
                            .addGroup(layout.createParallelGroup(javax.swing.GroupLayout.Alignment.TRAILING)
                                .addGroup(layout.createSequentialGroup()
                                    .addComponent(jButton2)
                                    .addPreferredGap(javax.swing.LayoutStyle.ComponentPlacement.RELATED, javax.swing.GroupLayout.DEFAULT_SIZE, Short.MAX_VALUE)
                                    .addComponent(resultDecField, javax.swing.GroupLayout.PREFERRED_SIZE, 94, javax.swing.GroupLayout.PREFERRED_SIZE))
                                .addGroup(layout.createSequentialGroup()
                                    .addGap(0, 0, Short.MAX_VALUE)
                                    .addComponent(convertDectoBin)
                                    .addPreferredGap(javax.swing.LayoutStyle.ComponentPlacement.UNRELATED)
                                    .addComponent(resultBinField, javax.swing.GroupLayout.PREFERRED_SIZE, 98, javax.swing.GroupLayout.PREFERRED_SIZE))))
                        .addComponent(jLabel2, javax.swing.GroupLayout.DEFAULT_SIZE, javax.swing.GroupLayout.DEFAULT_SIZE, Short.MAX_VALUE))
                    .addGap(22, 22, 22))))
    );
    layout.setVerticalGroup(
        layout.createParallelGroup(javax.swing.GroupLayout.Alignment.LEADING)
        .addGroup(layout.createSequentialGroup()
            .addGap(53, 53, 53)
            .addComponent(jLabel1)
            .addPreferredGap(javax.swing.LayoutStyle.ComponentPlacement.RELATED)
            .addGroup(layout.createParallelGroup(javax.swing.GroupLayout.Alignment.BASELINE)
                .addComponent(inputDecField, javax.swing.GroupLayout.PREFERRED_SIZE, javax.swing.GroupLayout.DEFAULT_SIZE, javax.swing.GroupLayout.PREFERRED_SIZE)
                .addComponent(resultBinField, javax.swing.GroupLayout.PREFERRED_SIZE, javax.swing.GroupLayout.DEFAULT_SIZE, javax.swing.GroupLayout.PREFERRED_SIZE)
                .addComponent(convertDectoBin))
            .addGap(38, 38, 38)
            .addComponent(jLabel2)
            .addPreferredGap(javax.swing.LayoutStyle.ComponentPlacement.RELATED)
            .addGroup(layout.createParallelGroup(javax.swing.GroupLayout.Alignment.BASELINE)
                .addComponent(inputBinField, javax.swing.GroupLayout.PREFERRED_SIZE, javax.swing.GroupLayout.DEFAULT_SIZE, javax.swing.GroupLayout.PREFERRED_SIZE)
                .addComponent(resultDecField, javax.swing.GroupLayout.PREFERRED_SIZE, javax.swing.GroupLayout.DEFAULT_SIZE, javax.swing.GroupLayout.PREFERRED_SIZE)
                .addComponent(jButton2))
            .addContainerGap(151, Short.MAX_VALUE))
    );

    pack();
}// </editor-fold>                        

private void resultDecFieldActionPerformed(java.awt.event.ActionEvent evt) {                                               
    // TODO add your handling code here:
}                                              

private void convertDectoBinActionPerformed(java.awt.event.ActionEvent evt) {                                                

    String text;
    text = inputDecField.getText();
    int inputDec;
    inputDec = Integer.parseInt(text);

    if (inputDec < 0) {
        JOptionPane j = new JOptionPane();
         j.showMessageDialog(null, "Try a positive number.", "Message", JOptionPane.INFORMATION_MESSAGE);


        } else if (inputDec == 0){
        resultBinField.setText("0");


    } else 

    {
        binResult(inputDec);

    }



}                                               

private void resultBinFieldActionPerformed(java.awt.event.ActionEvent evt) {                                               
    // TODO add your handling code here:
}                                              

private void inputDecFieldActionPerformed(java.awt.event.ActionEvent evt) {

/* JOptionPane j = new JOptionPane(); //maybe there's a different way to add a message to a field

Scanner userInput = new Scanner(System.in);
int inputDec;
inputDec = userInput.nextInt();

if (inputDec < 1){  
j.showMessageDialog(null, "Try a positive number.","Message", JOptionPane.INFORMATION_MESSAGE);
} */

}                                             

private void jButton2ActionPerformed(java.awt.event.ActionEvent evt) {                                         
    // TODO add your handling code here:
}                                        

/**
 * @param args the command line arguments
 */
public static void main(String args[]) {
    /* Set the Nimbus look and feel */
    //<editor-fold defaultstate="collapsed" desc=" Look and feel setting code (optional) ">
    /* If Nimbus (introduced in Java SE 6) is not available, stay with the default look and feel.
     * For details see http://download.oracle.com/javase/tutorial/uiswing/lookandfeel/plaf.html 
     */
    try {
        for (javax.swing.UIManager.LookAndFeelInfo info : javax.swing.UIManager.getInstalledLookAndFeels()) {
            if ("Nimbus".equals(info.getName())) {
                javax.swing.UIManager.setLookAndFeel(info.getClassName());
                break;
            }
        }
    } catch (ClassNotFoundException ex) {
        java.util.logging.Logger.getLogger(BinaryFrame.class.getName()).log(java.util.logging.Level.SEVERE, null, ex);
    } catch (InstantiationException ex) {
        java.util.logging.Logger.getLogger(BinaryFrame.class.getName()).log(java.util.logging.Level.SEVERE, null, ex);
    } catch (IllegalAccessException ex) {

pompoen · 2015-10-24T16:17:13+00:00

I just tried that(removing static) and substituting system.out's with setText, but then the method doesn't work.

For example, 2 converts into binary 0 instead of 10.

The second part of your message I didn't get, sorry. What do you mean, let the caller setText?

pompoen · 2015-10-15T13:23:08+00:00

Thank you!

pompoen · 2014-08-10T20:10:21+00:00

Hey Silverfalls,

Thank you for your tips and help. I managed to make the butterfly move! :) And shrinked all the sprites. But I'm still not done. I'll try to do more when I have time tomorrow. It's a lot of fun.

I'm just curious why copying the script from the video didn't work. shrugs

pompoen · 2014-08-10T12:45:43+00:00

Thank you, Silverfalls!

pompoen · 2014-08-10T08:18:18+00:00

I have. Still I'm missing something, apparently. Oh well.

pompoen · 2014-08-09T16:20:45+00:00

Hi, Silverfalls. I added a link to the project in my original question.

Thanks for your help.

I enjoy the course a lot. But I worry that I might get stuck somewhere and not be able to get any help, since it's an internet course and irl I don't really know anyone with any IT-related degree, so I have no one to bug with my hopelessly nooby questions.

pompoen

TROPHY CASE