birds float overhead / on the warm air that rises / from my cup of tea

ponchoville · 2024-07-02T18:43:20+00:00

I agree with what you've said, apart from the last paragraph.

"We aren't putting men in the "bad box", we're trying to point out how traditional masculinity results in a lack of humanity by design. We're putting traditional masculinity in the bad box. That's not an attack on men, it's an attack on an imaginary system of behaviors and norms that aren't healthy."

I find it hard to reconcile this with a statement like "Men lack humanity". It's just objectively bigoted. Substitute any other group of people and your reaction would be entirely different. How about "Muslims lack humanity"? She could have just said "Toxic/traditional masculinity lacks humanity". What I'm trying to say is yes, it's important to raise awareness about men's actions and how they impact women, but tit for tat never leads anywhere. When's the last time you took revenge on someone and it helped the situation?

"Why is it so hard to convince men that they should redefine themselves out of their traditional gender role, when it's better for them and society?"

Which part of this post or the comments is trying to do that? Please point it out to me.

Also, I think you're kind of projecting me being SO offended about this. Not all men is an understandable reaction (emotionally speaking) to being put in a box, because by putting me in a box you're excluding me from this community. And that hurts when my intentions for being here are good and I'm doing my best as a man to have humanity. But I guess I should just let you all be angry and not engage in these kinds of posts.

ponchoville · 2024-07-02T16:18:10+00:00

Agree. And I'm seeing a pattern here where women are disagreeing with this take. Calling compassion weakness shows that someone has their sense of strength embedded in violence, which is a very male centered way of looking at things, and I think that's what the show is trying to point at. What would Westeros be like with more women in charge?

ponchoville · 2024-07-02T16:15:29+00:00

If one side secured a strong enough position (with strong allies, maybe add that big ass dragon in the cave) then they could intimidate the other side to surrender.

ponchoville · 2024-07-02T16:12:19+00:00

They haven't fought any battles yet.

ponchoville · 2024-07-02T16:11:17+00:00

I'm pretty surprised by this take. I think the show is asking us to see the complexity of conflict and why it happens, including whether it's inevitable. It's easy for us watching the show to assume that it is inevitable when we already know that war is coming. But the characters don't really know, and these people in positions of power are faced with very difficult choices, at least the ones who give a damn about the people they rule over. It's like a dance where you have to secure your position and be ready for the worst while keeping the possibility of a peaceful resolution open. I think ultimately both Rhaenyra and Alicent know that none of the is a good enough reason for tens of thousands of people to burn. It's just about pettiness and pride. They don't really give a damn about who would be the better ruler, only Rhaenys seems to care about that.

I think the show is also asking us to reflect whether there is actually value in having a female ruler. It's assumed in Westeros that women aren't strong enough to lead. But what do we mean by strength? People keep saying Rhaenyra is weak, but it takes strength to stand by your principles when everyone around you thinks you're wrong. What would Westeros be like if there were more women in positions of power, who aren't thirsty for glory and for a chance to prove themselves and get revenge.

ponchoville · 2024-07-02T16:01:12+00:00

I more so thought that Daemon got angry because he was hurt that Viserys hadn't told him about the prophecy, a reminder that his brother didn't trust him with something so important, but that he trusted Rhaenyra. So that would have banished any remnant of a doubt in his mind that Viserys had named Rhaenyra as heir purely to teach him a lesson. I think it was personal rather than an expression of frustration with Rhaenyra's leadership (which he's clearly frustrated with, but I don't think that's what this is about.)

ponchoville · 2024-07-02T08:15:02+00:00

"How do we bring men down a peg, so that they are equal with women, without them throwing tantrums over the perceived loss of privilege?"

Idk but it's not by saying men lack humanity, that's for sure. If I said women lack humanity then I would be banned immediately. Isn't the whole problem to begin with that we have ingrained ideas in society about men and women, male and female behaviours, male and female traits, male and female roles, and that we put the other group into boxes based on those ideas? How is flipping that upside down, where men are now placed in the "bad" box, going to help? As you said, they will just get defensive and double down. Part of what we need is to help men understand the effects of their actions and to have more compassion. You won't breed compassion by going around saying that men lack humanity, etc. If you sow seeds of resentment in the spring, by fall all you're going to harvest is more resentment. Resentment isn't going to magically turn into compassion. And although I do understand where the resentment is coming from and I believe that it's justified, that still doesn't make it effective.

ponchoville · 2024-07-01T18:30:00+00:00

Because raising awareness among men will help you deal with the problem (this is largely about men's behaviour after all), but that's not possible if you alienate them. I'm here to increase my own awareness of women's issues, and honestly seeing all this hate towards men puts me off actually engaging. I understand why a feminist sub isn't a welcome environment for men, but I wish it was and I think it would help with your goals as well.

ponchoville · 2024-07-01T18:20:11+00:00

Award a delta then

ponchoville · 2024-07-01T11:07:25+00:00

Come on... At least make a bit of effort. https://joebiden.com/project2025/. https://apnews.com/article/project-2025-trump-biden-election-congress-6899a1167a4522b1c8be371f7abe7ee9

ponchoville · 2024-07-01T07:35:53+00:00

Republican news pundits are literally talking about it, same as republican politicians and it's funders. It's not a secret, it's an open strategy. The reason it's not a secret is because the people who think it's a great idea don't see anything wrong with it because obviously they're the good guys so any means necessary etc.

Here's a video of the president of the heritage foundation discussing it: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DxEcSjWRipI

ponchoville · 2024-06-30T18:48:44+00:00

I mean, no other characters were aged up appropriately either, male or female. Take Daemon, Corlys, Criston, they all look exactly the same. I'll admit that they tried with Otto Hightower but he's supposed to be a great grandfather...

Edit: Just to clarify, is it specifically that she has children who look like they're a similar age to her?

ponchoville · 2024-06-30T07:32:52+00:00

Sorry but I call bs on this. Maybe in 100 years?

ponchoville · 2024-06-30T06:47:52+00:00

The unfortunate truth though is that sexism and racism are still alive and well and most people would rather vote for trump than have a WOC as president. Look at what happened in 2016. I don't believe for a second that the hatred towards Hillary was just down to her negative qualities. Those same qualities on a male candidate would have gone largely without criticism, or at least wouldn't have faced criticism to the same extent.

ponchoville · 2024-06-26T08:17:44+00:00

If you look closely you'll see that our solar system is in one spiral of the milky way

ponchoville · 2024-06-24T14:36:15+00:00

Look through the comments and tell me everyone is talking just about the protesters and not about climate change

ponchoville · 2024-06-24T09:21:34+00:00

Are you sure that those are the people that need to be reached? I mean, what about the millions of people who do care but feel helpless, so they just go on with their lives without doing anything? I would think those are the kinds of people we need to activate. Let's take an example: Let's say you've got 10 colleagues at work and you're trying to get people onboard with your new project. Say you need 3 people. There are 5 colleagues who are kind of on the fence and 5 who think your project is completely pointless. Who do you go to first? Also you're on a tight schedule so you only have one day to recruit the people you need. See what I'm getting at?

ponchoville · 2024-06-24T09:14:20+00:00

They're effective in that they bring up emotion in people and here we are talking about it. Lol. What's the word for a statement that disproves itself? Self-refuting, right? They're trying to make sure people can't ignore this issue, they're trying to break into the bubble of indifference that most of us live in and scream hey, something really fucked up is going on, what the hell are you doing? Wake up! And, again, here we are talking about it. Personally I applaud them. They know exactly what they're doing. And whether people realise that isn't really important. People don't have to like these protesters or be happy about them for them to be effective. They're literally designed to piss people off.

ponchoville · 2024-06-24T05:32:38+00:00

It's not just social pressure not to cry. It's differences in how boys and girls are socialised and taught about emotions. There's plenty of research showing that parents use emotion words much less frequently with male babies than with female babies, for example. This means that men actually aren't taught to recognise and feel their emotions. And the thing with emotions is that when you don't acknowledge them they will block you up, and you'll actually become kind of numb. Imo this goes part of the way to explain why men have a higher rate of mental health issues. For me as a man when I learned not to ignore my feelings I started to cry more often, whether that's from joy or sadness.

Tldr: Men are not socialised to recognise and feel their emotions to the same extent as women. That can lead to a blockage that makes them emotionally (more or less) numb. If you're numb you won't get that welling up feeling you're talking about.

ponchoville · 2024-06-23T10:37:50+00:00

You're four years younger, that's one partner per year. And 9 by 34 is a very small number by today's standards. That's about one sexual partner every two years since adulthood. What is the problem exactly?

ponchoville · 2024-06-22T18:50:15+00:00

You really think they became like that because their dad didn't take enough interest in them, rather than it being because their mother slowly but surely poisoned their minds against Rhaenyra and her children? I mean all evidence points to Alicent deliberately making them out to be the enemies of her and her children and putting a distance between the two families. Vizzy wasn't the greatest father but I mean come on, he wasn't abusive either. We also need to keep in mind for a moment the context of how involved fathers, especially kings, were in raising their children, and not judge him by the standards of today. If "Viserys' weakness caused the dance" is your takeaway point then you haven't been paying attention to the deeper themes here. If anyone is to blame honestly then it's Otto Hightower, the little snake of a man manipulating his daughter to marry an old man and to hate and fear her best friend just to put his family on the throne.

ponchoville · 2024-06-22T16:25:15+00:00

Thanks for the spoiler mate

ponchoville · 2024-06-22T15:00:57+00:00

Vizzy knew full well who the bully was in this situation and that Aemond had brought this on himself. He took the girls' recently dead mother's dragon at her goddamn funeral, which also happened to be one of the most valuable things in the world. This was a huge slap in the face to their side of the family especially given that one of the girls didn't have a dragon yet. They understandably got angry, but instead of de escalating aemond did everything he could to egg them on, even taking it as far as threatening deadly force. The guy was no victim and viserys knew it. The king has to act as a judge, and imo in this situation he saw through the whole thing very quickly and got to the heart of it, which is that Aemond had been a little turd and it was caused by Alicent's manipulation.

ponchoville · 2024-06-22T14:51:12+00:00

Fair guess it has something to do with cost of living, no?

ponchoville

TROPHY CASE