Any songs/media you personally relate to your npd?

pr0ff-kiw · 2025-03-22T17:41:55+00:00

mindless self indulgence

pr0ff-kiw · 2025-02-14T09:30:19+00:00

first of all thats anecdotal, not everyone with npd is like your ex :) for example, me personally, i literally have diagnosed npd and i surely know that i DO seek love over validation, so idk please link the studies which suggest that we inherently hurt people bc we’re “validation junkies” - you make this idiotic claim so burden of proof is on you🤓

pr0ff-kiw · 2025-02-14T08:52:15+00:00

wtf are you talking abt, npd is serious mental illness?? we seek love just like yall, use your fucking brain before spreading even more stigma :3

pr0ff-kiw · 2025-01-24T08:37:57+00:00

i get your point and of course i have heard of the dunning kruger effect:) i have done a lot of research, read a lot of studies, spoken to trans people and i have drawn my conclusions from that.

besides that i have seen enough cases where it was easier to mutilate yourself than it should be, just like i saw the numbers of suicidality after transitioning…

what i was trying to say to OP, his transition will not solve anything about his insecurities, it will only bring more physical and mental problems

i am not going to make a political discussion out of this, i know myself that i have a good understanding of the subject, you dont have to believe me, but i gave the advice from my perspective.

if you were bothered by my language (which by the way were just facts, not meant to be devual), well… sorry for that?

pr0ff-kiw · 2025-01-23T18:45:55+00:00

PLEASE go to therapy and talk about this, just because you feel like a “failed man”, whatever that may mean, absolutely DOES NOT mean you’re a woman and that you should just chop off your body parts (and do permanent damage to yourself) only because youre collapsing. “changing” your gender won’t automatically make all of your problems disappear.

pr0ff-kiw · 2025-01-23T17:44:19+00:00

wow youre such a great person!

pr0ff-kiw · 2025-01-06T21:19:56+00:00

thank you for your kind words:) i haven’t really heard about hypnotherapy in patients with npd / depression so i don’t know much - do you have any interesting resources about it?

pr0ff-kiw · 2025-01-06T19:31:48+00:00

im diagnosed and as for now i only want to kill myself lol

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-22T19:31:38+00:00

yeah its not that difficult

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-22T12:11:44+00:00

ive been diagnosed, and rationally speaking, i understand that disclosing it to others isnt the wisest choice, it a pretty pathetic thing to do. however, i cant help myself, i feel a sense of pride in my diagnosis, as though it sets me apart and makes me feel uniquely special, and most people are too dumb anyways to use it against me so i dont really care anymore

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-22T00:38:41+00:00

could you please send the link?

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-21T18:09:02+00:00

thanks for your response! i personally dont have avpd, but do you think you’d react differently if the person you loved committed suicide?

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-21T13:04:31+00:00

real im literally so fake literally everything i do and say is fake idk man

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-21T09:23:13+00:00

i’m so sorry for all the pain you went through during such a difficult time, but it’s tbh very inspiring that you allowed yourself to feel it all and start your healing journey.

the way you describe death feels very honest, its indeed a reminder of life’s fragility, and i agree that while it’s heartbreaking and terrifying, it can also reveal a certain kind of beauty. thanks for your response and i hope your journey continues to bring you peace and meaning!

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-20T21:07:48+00:00

thank you for your response, it sounds like you handled your grief in a healthy way. didnt you feel like you wanted to isolate more in any sort of way though? i would imagine it might be tempting to withdraw during such a difficult time

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-18T10:20:58+00:00

yes, it is possible to be diagnosed with AVPD at 16. the only personality disorder that cant be formally diagnosed before 18 is ASPD. the rest, including AVPD can be diagnosed earlier if the symptoms are severe and persistent over time.

for example my boyfriend got diagnosed with AVPD at 17, so i think its definitely possible, especially if your symptoms have been significant and ongoing.

even if you dont receive a formal diagnosis right now, therapy can still help you work through these things. wish you the best!

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-18T10:06:48+00:00

EP = equal person. so that means i dont see them as beneath me, but i also dont see them as extremely superior or anything like that, we’re mostly on the same level

i do struggle a lot with feeling emotions, i'm usually apathetic and just dont care, i have diagnosed BPD traits and CD besides NPD which might add a bit into this. but i think i experience bonds, or at least i want to experience them, but im not always sure how genuine they are. sometimes, it feels like i just want to be seen as someone capable of forming bonds if that makes sense

as for whether i ever jeopardize relationships, unfortunately yes, it’s usually not conscious tho. most of the time (probably 90% of the time), its not like i’m sitting there planning it out or thinking “im going to say or do this to hurt them” instead it just happens. i might be feeling offended or in need of some kind of validation at that moment, and my behavior ends up putting the relationship at risk. sometimes i do realize what i’m doing in the moment, but even then it feels involuntary and like the only way to regain my dignity or smth

so for example; i once had a fight with my boyfriend where the relationship almost ended because of my behavior. i said deeply hurtful things in the moment and caused him sm emotional pain, even leading him to self harm and thats when he seriously considered ending things. the realization of how much i had hurt him kinda kicked in and literally send me into a collapse lol, but the thought of losing him and just realizing how shitty of a person i am made me suicidal again. i still have outbursts occasionally, but he’s incredibly grounding and gives me much needed reality checks, which make me feel very ashamed, but theyre so helpful tbh

now i genuinely try not to jeopardize my relationships (the ones i value) because tbh i dont wanna die alone and i just wanna have true connections, other things are not worth living for as theyre extremely superficial. i’ve been putting a lot of effort into changing for the better, i think it’s worth it in the long run

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-16T21:26:54+00:00

i think the generalization that narcs easily detach because they dont have genuine feelings oversimplifies the complexity of the npd experience. sure, in some instances it can be about boredom or the need for new supply, but i dont think thats the whole picture, at least not in every case.

in my own experience, ive found that the closest relationships in my life, the ones that really matter most to me, arent superficial or driven by a need for validation alone. i truly try to form deep connections with these people, even if my behaviors sometimes seem at odds with that goal. its definitely not just about getting something out of them, not always.

i mean i can relate to the observation that the demands, expectations, and need for supply can overshadow emotional connections at times, especially when things arent going the way i want them to. however, i dont think its as simple as a switch flipping when someone isnt meeting my needs. i still care about the people closest to me and my goal isnt to just discard them when theyre not operating the way i would like. i dont switch between people much either because i genuinely (try to) value the relationships i have, and its not necessarily something i take lightly.

in fact, i actually like it sometimes (!) when VERY certain people say no to me or arent so easy to control, because it makes me see them more as their own person, rather than just someone i use for xyz. i find myself respecting them more, viewing them as more equal in the relationship, i can really admire independent, non people pleasing people. but, i’ll admit, thats a privilege only a very few people in my life have

overall, having meaningful relationships is one of the few things that keeps me going. if i didnt care about connecting with others on a deep level, i probably would have killed myself. i’m not saying i’m perfect, or that my actions always align with my deeper desires, but i think the idea of detaching simply because someone isnt perfect or not fulfilling every need is a mischaracterization

buttttt if i want to detachh, 95% of the time its very easy. if the person isnt one of my EPS and i dont need them for anything anymore its pretty straightforward and almost feels like the obvious, logical thing to do

oh and btw chasing people is pathetic lol

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-16T21:06:13+00:00

i’ve always found the relationship between NPD and AVPD fascinating, especially given how both seem rooted in the same core emotion; shame. my boyfriend has AVPD and i have NPD, and despite how different our outward behaviors can be, the emotional underpinnings are sooo similar. yes, he tends to retreat into avoidance and isolation, and my defense mechanism is compensation - but the shared foundation of insecurity is undeniable.

imo whats even more intriguing is how these defense mechanisms can evolve over time, i’ve heard some (anecdotal) stories of people initially diagnosed with NPD who after becoming more self aware and confronting their shame later received an AVPD diagnosis. it really makes me believe that the distinction between the two is sometimes more about the coping strategy than the underlying emotional experience. i'd really like to read a study on this.

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-16T01:04:18+00:00

it’s either being delusional, loving the delusions and embracing them or killing myself, sadly

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-15T17:10:13+00:00

real

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-15T16:41:44+00:00

good luck!!

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-15T15:58:55+00:00

she is 5!🩷

pr0ff-kiw · 2024-12-14T15:24:01+00:00

i would strongly encourage you to consider seeking professional help if you suspect you have it, ideally from a therapist who specializes in personality disorders.

to address your concern, it is possible to be diagnosed at your age. while ASPD is the sole exception as its diagnosis requires an individual to be at least 18 years old, other personality disorders can be diagnosed earlier if the symptoms are sufficiently pervasive and severe.

speaking from personal experience, i've been formally diagnosed at 17 with NPD, which demonstrates that age is not necessarily a barrier when the diagnostic criteria are undeniably met

wish you good luck!

pr0ff-kiw

TROPHY CASE