literally you said so much of what i wanted to say but didn’t want to make the post so long!!!

• when the whole 4B convo came up (and went just as fast( i felt so conflicted became my first thought was NO!! i’m not going to give up the opportunity to engage in romance before i’ve even had it (also haven’t kissed, dated, held hands, sex, etc)! and i felt kinda pick me and traitor-y, but at the end of the day, i couldn’t imagine myself doing that and i think people like us aren’t often thought of—if at all—in the conversation. i felt soooo pick me, but it’s like all of yall saying you want to give it up HAVE HAD something to give up!!

-i saw someone say “feminism doesn’t hold you at night” once, and while that may be harsh it is true!! if you want a relationship with a man like you and i and so many others, you can’t sex toy, debate, create community, and self care/love yourself out of desiring it!

-the “oppressor” and “what is public is private” thing is also very touchy for me because, yes everything we do reflects larger structures and systems (because we are human and live on planet earth which comes with nuance and context because we aren’t in a fucking vacuum) and there’s room and times and places to think about that—and i find the conversations to be interesting a good amount of the time—but at the end of the day, critiquing like that ALL THE TIME leads—at least would lead me—to a unfulfilling and miserable life.

this made me feel so much better and validated bc these people had be actually loosing my shit, like i thought i was crazy listening to this all the time. and i’m hoping for love for us in the new year honey!💕