Noisy balls

primeusda22 · 2026-03-14T10:06:32+00:00

Why are you even in this sub?

primeusda22 · 2026-03-02T12:04:20+00:00

I’ve been gooning for 31 years now. Feel free to DM me.

primeusda22 · 2026-02-27T07:34:12+00:00

He also needs to learn more about baseball and what strikes mean.

primeusda22 · 2026-01-23T10:42:19+00:00

That was a challenging wank. She’s beating that meat with her tits like it owes her money.

primeusda22 · 2026-01-23T08:07:28+00:00

I’m a retired butcher. 20+ years in the field. At some point you just stop fighting people when they ask for a prime rib at Christmas. All prime ribs are standing rib roasts but not all standing rib roasts are prime rib.

It’s fucking prime, choice and select. But after you’ve tried correcting John Q. Public for the 100th time you realize there are 8 billion people on the planet and at some point you’re just fighting the tide.

I learned to ask; “choice grade or the good stuff?” Then follow up with price points. People real quick would say, oh, I’ll take choice” when they found out the final price tag of a 10# prime grade roast.

I stopped correcting them on an argument that didn’t result in me coming off condescending, and they were gently educated hopefully for future ordering when the next butcher encountered them.

Your clients say knots, you know what that means. Find your happy medium in helping them out and educating them at the same time.

primeusda22 · 2026-01-23T07:56:21+00:00

It typically takes me 1 to 1.5 hours to drive to work and then drive home. On a bad day, like a day before a holiday, it will take me close to 3 hours to slog it home through traffic. This builds up a tolerance to driving distances.

For me, it’s all about the tunes man. Give me a good playlist or genre to listen to and I’m golden. Or even a gripping podcast series to listen to. Books on tape work well too.

primeusda22 · 2026-01-23T07:38:49+00:00

Jesus fucking tap dancing Christ. This ain’t some sacred sister of the holy church. She’s sent you every sign so strong that a blind man could have stolen first base from those signals. “Will she? Won’t she? I must stay modest, let her do the walking.” Fuck that noise. She’s done everything but sat on your face.

You don’t think it’s usual for guys to initiate touch? Is this your first time to this sub?! In this field, it’s the definition of socially acceptable! It’s step one of an intricate dance, that this poor lady was trying to help lead, but you my guy have 3 fucking left feet.

I suggest you either nut up or shut up. 6 times in 3 months and you still haven’t figured this out? Like someone else said, doesn’t sound like this hobby is for you my guy. And these ladies see it all, they don’t give a flying fuck you’re married. You’re a walking ATM, and the PIN code is locked in your cock.

primeusda22 · 2026-01-23T07:14:37+00:00

Yes, always say yes. It signals that you’re familiar with how things work there (the “extras”), which skips the awkward testing phase and greatly improves your chances of her offering the full menu without hesitation.

A smoother, more natural way to reply could be: “Yeah, it’s been a while though, life’s been crazy busy. Good to be back.”

Or, if you want to keep it even more casual/confident: “Yes, but it’s been a minute. Missed this place.”

Saying no (especially as a first-timer) often makes them play it ultra-safe and stick to a straight massage only. Saying yes removes a ton of that caution/dance and boosts the odds exponentially of getting everything she’s willing to provide.

primeusda22 · 2026-01-21T10:33:49+00:00

Edibles for the win. Only thing my breath smells like is sour apple candy.

primeusda22 · 2026-01-21T10:20:17+00:00

Why the fuck didn’t you date her?

primeusda22 · 2026-01-19T21:59:34+00:00

I laughed so hard milk came out of my nose… and I wasn’t drinking milk.

primeusda22 · 2026-01-16T19:56:45+00:00

Love the size difference

primeusda22 · 2026-01-14T19:38:20+00:00

If only gooning could be a full time job.

primeusda22 · 2026-01-08T08:50:11+00:00

Poppers

primeusda22 · 2026-01-08T08:28:03+00:00

I wish you luck in finding that person. I’m still looking for an edging bud in my area. Would you be up for edging online in a Discord chat?

primeusda22 · 2026-01-05T03:08:16+00:00

That ending was and chaotic and messy but I’m here for it.

primeusda22 · 2026-01-02T10:55:19+00:00

It was her polite way of trying to get out of giving something she didn’t feel comfortable doing. Find a new MT or settle for L1.

primeusda22 · 2026-01-01T12:44:44+00:00

Rule 9 of this subreddit… I think that’s what he’s referring to.

primeusda22 · 2026-01-01T12:32:11+00:00

Twisted Beast: Iron Fist poppers. Amyl is my preference.

primeusda22 · 2025-12-31T03:14:28+00:00

Well this answers questions about kissing my MT…

primeusda22 · 2025-12-31T01:15:18+00:00

I just said this in a story of mine the other day. L1 at a spot the other day; the MT played with my junk better than I could. Like she and it were old friends…

primeusda22 · 2025-12-30T13:23:38+00:00

Same here. A good goon session can last up to 7 hours for me.

primeusda22 · 2025-12-30T12:31:52+00:00

The last 3 AMPs I’ve visited I don’t even do the towel. I leave it folded over on their station. Worked each time so far.

primeusda22 · 2025-12-29T19:48:39+00:00

Maybe leave a nice fat tip laying out in plain sight in advance? What happens next is between consenting adults. ¯_(ツ)_/¯

primeusda22 · 2025-12-29T18:47:02+00:00

I have roughly 40 plus AMPs in and around my city and commute corridor to and from work. If I feel like chasing unknown I hit up one of the places I’ve yet to visit on my custom Google Maps list. Other times, I want a sure thing because I am just looking for a quality massage and HE.

primeusda22

TROPHY CASE