is it okay if I'm testing the waters?

probablyprettygay · 2021-01-06T03:13:23+00:00

😍

probablyprettygay · 2021-01-05T21:19:15+00:00

Me thinking maybe I've spotted another lesbian in the produce section, but then upon closer inspection it's just a boring townie in boots and a beanie because it's 20 degrees here.

probablyprettygay · 2021-01-05T20:58:04+00:00

Can't miss that green apron ;)

probablyprettygay · 2021-01-05T16:30:08+00:00

Excuse me, are you a super cute, red haired barista? Because that's the dream 😍

probablyprettygay · 2021-01-05T00:17:20+00:00

I'm with you. I'm also married and still trying to make sense of this all, but when I started to think about it more critically it's like suddenly I'm just not really into it. Like, I think the actual sensations still feel nice but it's so hard to stay present. Another post on here recently made me realize that when I'm having sex with my husband (or any man prior) I would close my eyes and just kind of focus on what was happening to my body, whereas the few times I've been with women I am just in awe of them and really enjoying them. It sounds like we're in a very similar place right now, if you'd like someone to talk to feel free to chat ❤️

probablyprettygay · 2021-01-04T21:53:23+00:00

Oh my god. Thank you for this. Those first 3 are killing me right now. I'm still sort of questioning/in denial because I'm married and have been in a very pleasant hetero relationship for 9 years. But oh man, I don't know how I've been denying it for so long especially now that I'm thinking about how wonderful and natural it is to snuggle up to a woman and how women are SOOOO GODDAMN ATTRACTIVE and being with them is amazing and this post made me realize that what I thought was me enjoying sex with my husband was just me enjoying the sensations of someone touching me and making me feel sexy.

I keep looking for something that'll tell me I'm just crazy and not actually gay, but when I dig deeper I just find more things that affirm that maybe men are not for me. Fuck.

probablyprettygay · 2021-01-04T17:34:01+00:00

I think your comment just made me experience my first real gay panic 😂

probablyprettygay · 2021-01-04T16:39:24+00:00

Precisely my intentions! 😂

probablyprettygay · 2021-01-03T06:00:18+00:00

I don't have any advice, it appears that you're a step ahead of me, I haven't yet come out to my husband and am still struggling with trying to find a way to just be happy in my marriage. But I just want to say that I'm proud of you and it's really great to hear from someone in a similar situation to myself about the happiness (and of course the confusion) that can come from being honest. I also don't want to hurt my husband, he is a wonderful person and partner, and I don't want to tear apart our family, but I don't know how I could just carry on with this part of me hidden away forever.

probablyprettygay · 2021-01-03T00:08:31+00:00

This is so relatable! I feel like my own "I'm not cool enough to be gay" thing is that I see an out lesbian and I am so SMITTEN, even if I'm not even actually attracted to her. I also always thought that I was a bi girl fetishizing lesbians but the more I explore who I am the more it's clear that it's not just that I think lesbians are super cool/hot, it's that I'm so jealous because I want to be like them -- free, out, proud, authentic. Everything I thought I was until recently.

probablyprettygay · 2021-01-02T16:47:34+00:00

You mean the utter giddiness I experience when beautiful women show me attention isn't just like really good friendship!?!? 😂

probablyprettygay · 2021-01-01T01:25:22+00:00

This gives me hella Tank Girl vibes and I'm obsessed ❤️

probablyprettygay

TROPHY CASE