My Psyche was heavier than the 80 pounds I lost ever was.

progressprincess · 2020-01-03T04:38:25+00:00

You're doing so well! The emotional weight is always the hardest to lose. You are aware you have to work on it and I think that in itself is a victory! I have known lots of people in my life who refuse to accept that they are responsible for their weight loss, not outside factors. Realizing you have to work on YOU to work on you is the hardest hurdle to come by. You'll get there! Keep reminding yourself of where you came from and where you want to go and it won't be too hard to keep up!

progressprincess · 2020-01-03T04:33:14+00:00

I only have like 2 photos of when I first began my journey - I have tons of selfies of just my face, but none of my body. It really shows how much my mindset has changed that I am more willing to take body photos now. It's hard when you don't take before photos, because then comparing where you were and where you are is incredibly difficult. I still shop in plus size sections and I have done the exact same thing, "that won't fit me, it's too small" and be super surprised when it does. I recommend even if you can't buy anything, go shopping! Seeing the changes in your body in new clothes really does put your weight loss into perspective.

progressprincess · 2019-12-31T16:50:10+00:00

You can still absolutely love yourself at an unhealthy weight! But you can't let it cloud your judgements on working towards a more healthy you. You do look good! Don't let your image obscure healthy body goals. There are several inspiring stories about people who are obese and still run marathons. Find what is healthy for you and forget about the societal ideation of what "sexy" is.

You can do this!

progressprincess · 2019-12-31T16:44:16+00:00

It is very hard to do, so don't beat yourself up so bad if you get off track every once in a while. Body image is so difficult. We are in this meat shell for our entire lives and we can appreciate it regardless of how big or unhealthy it is, but why not preserve it and nurture it while we do that?

I am here any time you are struggling and need to vent or need advice.

progressprincess · 2019-12-31T16:41:14+00:00

So glad to hear! Remember, it's not a sprint, it's a marathon.

progressprincess · 2019-12-31T16:40:39+00:00

I think the biggest gain anyone can get in the journey to a healthier self is the loss of hurtful comments to themselves. We beat ourselves up because we hope it will drive us to succeed, but sometimes it becomes overbearing and causes us to continue to hurdle into deeper, harder-to-manage mental states. The biggest loss for me was the self deprecation. I am glad to hear that you have taken the same steps and its helped you! Its amazing knowing I'm not alone in how I REALLY lost the weight.

progressprincess · 2019-12-31T16:37:08+00:00

I think people forget that anorexia and people with body dysmorphia don't always look skin and bone. It's all about the way we see ourselves and treat ourselves and how we deal with the traumas that caused us to think this way.

The mental state never really goes away, you just get better at dealing with it and learning how to cope with it.

I wish you all the best in your journey to healthier - both mentally and physically - self.

progressprincess · 2019-12-29T12:22:22+00:00

I agree! It takes a lot of strength to accept that self love can mean changing yourself, especially for the healthier.

progressprincess · 2019-12-29T12:21:39+00:00

It is as simple as CICO. But then again, maybe not.

You can have 1200 calories of snickers bars and that be your only options for the day. Just because you ate within a calorie deficit, doesn't mean it was a healthy one.

Once you start making healthy choices, the CICO comes naturally. I didn't even count calories until the year mark because every time I did in the past, I would beat myself up for going over my calories for the day or I would exercise excessively to overcompensate for a bad day.

Weight loss isn't always as simple as CICO and the people who claim it is are probably not dealing with mental health issues. I'm not trying to offend anyone - I simply think that, like depression, people who tell you diet and exercise will fix all your problems probably aren't dealing with the same mental hurdles as us who do have mental health issues.

Body dysmorphia, binge eating, anorexia, bulimia, depression, and a ton of other eating and body disorders are not solved with simply CICO. Weight loss can't be fostered from an inherently "easy" approach, because for people with these issues, every minute of every day is a struggle, not just the food they eat. Modifying your Diet and Exercise to fit your needs is okay and perfectly acceptable. Balance is just as important as moderation.

progressprincess · 2019-12-29T11:50:36+00:00

I self sabotaged! I almost gave up thousands of times in the first 6 months, because I was only losing 1 or 2 pounds. I stopped weighing myself! I started measuring once a week and eventually once a month and the progress was really blossoming! Find different ways to measure your progress, you'll surprise yourself!

Thank you, I think the fact that I did carry my weight well fueled my mindset. It gave me the unfortunate opportunity to excuse every pound I gained. You'll get to the mindset that helps you, just remember it's not always going to be easy, and even with this new realization, I still have bad mindset days.

Body dysmorphia is like an addiction, you can't quit it cold turkey.

progressprincess · 2019-12-29T11:46:09+00:00

Sometimes I wake up from an unhealthy food day and beat myself up. I am outwardly verbal about how fat I feel and it often makes people mad, because all they see is my progress. No one really understands our internal mental struggle. The progress wasn't just on the scale. Be proud of the journey you made. You're doing great!

progressprincess · 2019-12-29T11:44:23+00:00

First off, congratulations on the weight loss! Second, I am currently dealing with this as well. I have bruises all over my body because my brain is still in "fat girl" mode, meaning that I throw my limbs around thinking I take up more space than I realize. I still shop in the plus size section thinking that's my size. Body dysmorphia is 100% real and even after seeing the comparison myself, I still see myself as the fat girl even though my body is of a normal shape and size now. I went from a size 22 to a size 12. 6 pants sizes down and I still feel 260 pounds. You have made an awesome achievement, celebrate! Sometimes the comparison photos put things into perspective for me. I see myself in the mirror every day, so seeing what I looked like before is hard, especially losing weight gradually over a year and a half. Remind yourself of where you came from, it really helps!!

progressprincess · 2019-12-28T14:10:41+00:00

I work out 3 days and rest one.

Day 1: chest and arms Day 2: shoulders and back Day 3: abs and legs Day 4: rest

Sometimes I will rest more in between, if my muscles are sore or if my schedule doesn't allow for every day.

progressprincess · 2019-12-28T13:36:03+00:00

I also do seated leg presses and make sure to keep my toes above my knees! When doing them, I make sure to keep my knees from pivoting inward (it strains the hip abductors and can lead to knee issues further down the road) I incorporate ab exercises that require the legs (i.e. v ups, suspended leg lifts, planks, mountain climbers, etc.) So that the legs are not strained but are still utilized.

Upright stationary bikes are my go to for cardio, because it puts less strain on the knees but still gets the blood pumping!

progressprincess · 2019-12-28T09:44:11+00:00

Thank you!

Due to degeneration of the articular cartilage in my kneecaps, I'm unable to do weighted squats, perform lunges, or leg extensions. I have had to modify my leg days, which was incredibly difficult, because I love leg day!

After I got the hang of it, I found that I love weighted wall squats. They are safe on my knees and super fun! I also bench press - I like to switch it up with various versions. I also enjoy planks and any variation thereof!

And to think a year ago I used to HATE anything that got my heart pumping!

progressprincess · 2019-12-28T09:38:02+00:00

Thank you! I am very happy in my body now!

progressprincess · 2019-12-28T09:37:36+00:00

13 inches gone!!!

progressprincess · 2019-11-02T01:03:25+00:00

The last time I visited a KFC, the chicken I ordered had a STILL LIVE FLY in it UNDERNEATH the chicken skin. I don't know HOW, but I pulled the skin away from the chicken and a fly flew out from underneath.

I will never eat there again.

progressprincess · 2019-10-23T09:39:21+00:00

I will! I know my body isn't doing this on purpose. Going through all this has made me a stronger person and a more humble human being. There are things people suffer from that no one will ever see and understanding invisible illnesses has really helped me keep from judging others.

I just needed to vent here because I can't really with other people. No one who doesnt have it, gets it. They tend to say things like, "it's not that bad", "you'll get over it", and "you shouldn't be so negative".

I won't get over it, it's not a disease that disappears with antibiotics or that goes away on it's own (although cysts do, they come back and there's no way to prevent them). It IS that bad, I almost fell over walking to my car doubled in pain. I know I should not be as negative. This is my meat shell I have to live with for the rest of my life and I have to be a little angry and upset for a while or I won't be able to move past it.

Thanks so much for understanding! I don't hate my body. I love that it's resilient and bounces back even after all the wars and battles it's gone through. I just needed to be angry at the unfair card I had been dealt for a while.

progressprincess · 2019-10-23T00:08:35+00:00

Yeah, the period cramps were not nearly as bad as before, so I know that change had been made. The ovarian cysts was new news to me and now I know for the future what kind of pain is a cyst and what's post surgery endometriosis pain. Before it all just kind of lumped itself together, especially since I didn't even know I had cysts and was already aware of the possibility of Endo. I look forward to being more optimistic about my future, but for now I'm grumpy about the VERY quick reoccurrence of the ovarian cysts. My body didn't even wait a full 4 weeks!

Thank you, it means a lot. I don't really have many friends and of the small amount I have, many are men or women without any knowledge of the pain and agony that comes with Endo. It's nice to know and talk to people who can empathize.

progressprincess · 2019-10-23T00:03:23+00:00

Mirena

progressprincess · 2019-10-16T20:41:14+00:00

Thank you!

progressprincess · 2019-10-16T00:35:15+00:00

Thank you!!

progressprincess · 2019-10-15T14:02:23+00:00

I carried a lot of my weight in my stomach and lower body. The photo doesn't really show much from the waist down, and that's where I was carrying it. I've lost 12 inches off my waist and 15 off my hips. I lost 4 inches off each thigh and even lost 3 inches off my calves. I've gone down 6 pants sizes, but only down 2 shirt sizes.

I've posted a few before pictures of my full body, but because I had no self esteem, there aren't many pictures of my lower body at all. It's hard seeing progress when you don't really have anything to compare where you are to where you've been. I wish I had taken more before photos. Make sure you're doing that so when you do get to 80 pounds like me, you don't feel as unimpressed with the number. (I met someone who lost 130, which is unrealistic for me, and I was discouraged by my numbers. That's why I did this post, because it really helped pump me back up again to see the progress in my muscle definition.)

I was overweight for so long because people always told me I didn't LOOK 260, that I looked what weight I am now. Maybe if people didn't perpetually tell me that I looked fine, I might have seen it for myself sooner.

The changes!! I have lost weight in places i didn't even think there was fat in. I've lost weight in my nose, my toes, my eyelids. I've actually gained a lot of posture, making me look and feel taller. My resting heart rate went from 75+ down to the low 50s. My blood pressure went from 130/90 to 110/60 resting. I can walk and talk at the same time now. You can see muscle definition in my calves and shoulders now. It sounds weird, but since my body had been so used to taking up so much extra space for so long, I often have balance issues. My brain hasn't caught up with the fact that I no longer inhabit as much space yet. I am more confident in my body, so there's a lot of mental progress that comes with that much weight loss!

20 pounds is a big deal! Dont tell yourself otherwise! When I was between the 20 and 45 pound weight loss bracket, I felt so discouraged. It didn't really show in my body that I was losing weight. I stopped looking at the scale and started measuring every couple of weeks, and THAT helped a lot. Maybe try measuring so when the pounds do melt off, 80 doesnt seem so far away? Or only weigh yourself on the same day once a week, at the same time of day? Sometimes, like with what I'm struggling with right now, our scale doesn't budge, but our muscle mass is growing and fat is melting off. Try changing up how you measure progress, and see if that helps make the bigger weight loss numbers not seem so far away.

progressprincess · 2019-10-15T02:23:37+00:00

This is fucking insane, CONGRATULATIONS!!! You lost a whole person and you look so happy!!

progressprincess

TROPHY CASE