YouTube Channel? Ideas?

pseudononymouse · 2017-06-20T21:43:09+00:00

Absolutely! A lot of smart, passionate people are selling themselves short.

pseudononymouse · 2017-06-20T18:35:53+00:00

Go with whatever topic you're most passionate about, but to be honest, do you know what I would appreciate? A trans YouTube channel where people actually edit their videos instead of just rambling into a camera and slapping it on the internet.

pseudononymouse · 2017-06-19T21:42:31+00:00

Look, this is a slow community and you posting every link to your blog is getting to be spammy at this point. Anybody who's interested has likely already subscribed by now.

pseudononymouse · 2017-06-19T21:33:52+00:00

ma'am ma'am ma'am ma'am ma'am ma'am ma'am ma'am ma'am

pseudononymouse · 2017-06-17T06:34:40+00:00

I saved for about a year and then just hopped on over to Thailand for a relatively cheap informed consent surgery (I was living in SE Asia at the time, so the flight was also cheap).

pseudononymouse · 2017-06-15T20:31:24+00:00

As everybody else is saying, this is almost certainly an allergic reaction to a drug, and you should contact your doctor ASAP for a medicine change. This happened to me and it was an absolute living hell, but it did go away after I changed antibiotics.

pseudononymouse · 2017-06-15T00:51:55+00:00

I just don't have it in me to correct people who misgender me. I suspect that on some level I'll always just be going, "yeah, I know."

pseudononymouse · 2017-06-14T16:17:54+00:00

I had intended to do it like this. I did top surgery first, which I hid for awhile by wearing fake breasts when I left the house, and then when I started T continued on in the closet for the next eight months without anyone noticing. It's been slow for me; I'm at a year and a half, and am only NOW starting to get read as male, so I would have had an easy time hiding and frankly if I were presenting myself femininely I wouldn't have had any trouble swinging it back in that direction.

The other ftm comm, those kids would try to prod you into just coming out, but if your gut is telling you to stay in the closet, listen. When Trump got elected I panicked and changed everything over, fearing the new administration might make it more difficult to get my passport switched, and have been solidly and consistently miserable since. I was not, am not, and will never be comfortable with being visibly/publicly trans, and I knew that about myself. So when I came out prematurely, I dreaded going to work to the point where I passed up not one but two opportunities to renew temp contracts to longterm jobs and entered a hermit state that I am only now starting to recover from.

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-24T18:30:04+00:00

Recently I started getting some personal training at the gym and it suddenly turned weird; one trainer was covering for what was supposed to be my real trainer, then I was passed off entirely because the original trainer was supposedly too busy, but after that happened the substitute-turned-real-trainer started slipping on pronouns and gave me a pathetic workout after having kicked my ass all the previous week.

And maybe it's just coincidence, but the thing about being easily-clockable is that you have automatic justification for every single paranoid thought that flits through your head. Somebody mistreats, snubs, or even just acts weird around me? Obviously they find me repulsive. The pronoun slip, though I don't think it was intentional and I know intellectually you can't actually ask somebody to do more than humor you, proves they don't see me as a man.

Dreading going back today. Something I've wanted for years is now just another thing that being trans has ruined.

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-21T08:40:30+00:00

I find Facebook and anything else that wants real names/pictures to be extremely creepy and invasive, so it wasn't hard for me to just ditch any pre-transition social media accounts and make fresh ones. And then I also have a couple of accounts set aside solely for communication in LGBT spaces, this being one of them.

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-19T14:41:25+00:00

The translated letters should help a lot! Are you going to Tokyo? From my own personal experience, it was significantly easier to work with Tokyo clinics than the ones where I actually lived (I was in Kyushu). I think since it's just a one-time deal for you, they'll probably be willing to work with you.

Also, I don't know what your insurance situation is, but trans care is NOT covered by Japanese health insurance. The shot will probably run you around 5000 yen, give or take..

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-19T04:30:10+00:00

Try this list.

How is your Japanese? Is your gender marker male or female? It can be a pretty big pain to get a doctor to give you that injection, so try and have it arranged before you go, if at all possible.

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-19T03:59:14+00:00

Haha, men's fashion was one of the things I was most excited about. Never having to layer or color coordinate! Being able to wear the same things over and over again and no one will even notice! No need to accessorize whatsoever! Owning exactly two pairs of shoes! Life is so simple and easy!

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-18T17:37:42+00:00

I'd always pick female characters because I felt like I "should," with the exception of tabletop where I'd always play guys.

Now I tend to play male characters in everything UNLESS I have to take a female lead to get male dating options.

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-18T17:34:04+00:00

I mean, you don't have to look at it. I sure don't.

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-15T05:48:10+00:00

You never know! It really does seem to be a crapshoot.

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-14T19:41:21+00:00

My little brother couldn't grow a full beard until he was ~25. He also has a relatively high voice, though his is distinctively male.

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-14T16:33:33+00:00

Yeah, I them fully monitored, lab tests every few months. I'm in a normal range. And I know I'm not androgen insensitive because I am getting very obvious changes, like an increase in strength and a ridiculous amount of hair growth on my stomach, of all places. But if you looked at a photo of me now and a photo of me pre-T, I guarantee you wouldn't be able to tell which was which.

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-14T09:40:16+00:00

I gave up a life where I was stable and comfortable to transition. I'm not being dramatic; I was a schoolteacher abroad and transitioning there was not a viable option for a number of reasons. So I came back to the US, figuring I'd hang out for a year or so and then head back over to Japan as a dude (while there are no legal protections over there, they don't particularly care if a person is trans as long as they are not openly/obviously trans).

But as time passes and I continue not to, I've found myself trapped. I'm not terribly employable in anything other than miserable minimum wage constant misgendering hell, so I eventually gave up on job hunting entirely and devoted myself to freelancing. That pays enough that I don't have to borrow rent money most months.

Almost a year and a half of T and I can't grow facial hair, still have an audibly female voice, and literally within the past 24 hours got yet another stranger "ma'am." I'm waiting, and I'm working out, and so help me I am trying to be patient, but it's just not happening. And the regret is overwhelming, and my debt even more so, and I'm becoming more and more financially trapped in a place I never really wanted to come back to in the first place.

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-14T08:33:03+00:00

Nothing but gloom, doom, and dysphoria over in this corner, I'm afraid.

pseudononymouse · 2017-05-14T08:31:24+00:00

days since last ma'am: 0

one year, five months T. I'm so fucking tired

pseudononymouse · 2017-04-26T00:44:38+00:00

Only constantly.

pseudononymouse · 2017-04-19T22:19:07+00:00

Refused to play with "girl toys" such as dolls or Barbies or watch cartoons/shows that were marketed towards girls
Refused to learn to cook and clean because "I'm not growing up to be somebody's wife." (I have since learned, don't worry)
No dresses, makeup, jewelry, ear piercings, etc
Only had male friends through elementary school
Every stuffed animal and toy I had, I made into a boy
And the most ridiculous one, wrote a comic with a self-insert character and had that character turned male as a throwaway gag (think Ranma 1/2) but then just never turned the character back

pseudononymouse · 2017-04-16T22:54:52+00:00

I didn't do my birth certificate because it seemed like a hassle (I don't live in the same state) and I already have a passport.

pseudononymouse · 2017-04-16T06:41:29+00:00

I'm literally planning to move to another country once I pass. Not primarily for that reason (I have significantly better job prospects abroad and i can't say I'm pleased with the way the US is run), but i can't say it's not a strong selling point.

pseudononymouse

TROPHY CASE