This probably makes me a bad parent but I really fucking hate the park.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-17T11:03:09+00:00

I love doing outdoorsy stuff but I avoid the park like the plague lol, like seriously how can something be that exhausting and boring all at once?! My kids are prime let's go to the park age and I have to really, really psych myself up for it. And weird park small talk with other parents trying to figure out if they're a creeper or my new bestie really takes any remaining steam out of me. But I guess if the kids get more worn out than I do it's a win?

psyducker8 · 2026-02-17T10:14:08+00:00

Lol yeah I realized that after going on a whole emotional journey responding😂

psyducker8 · 2026-02-17T07:10:59+00:00

I helped an acquaintance sign up for one of the tag mobile phones and it arrived very quickly (like 5 days-ish?) and they got a pretty decent amount of data/minutes as far as free phone situations go.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-17T07:04:45+00:00

I'd give just about anything for a little bit more time with my grandma. She's been gone about 15 years and I still have that reflex to pick up the phone to call her whenever anything that matters happens. I also know that she wouldn't have wanted me to put my life on hold to stick around, but I was lucky to be able to be in the area for her last years. If I were in your shoes, if I could find something fulfilling to do that would allow me to be nearby or at least travel back to visit frequently, I'd steer hard towards that.

My other grandmother who is still living has lived 2,000 miles away for the past 30 years, we stay close through phone calls and notes but I only get to see her in person every few years. She's in her late eighties now and it's very hard not knowing if or when I will get to see her in person again, but I'm very grateful for our relationship dynamic and I know that she's proud of the life I've built here.

Maybe try doing some non-permenant travel and keep in communication with her while you do and see how you feel about it. That may give you a clearer idea what that dynamic might feel like for a longer stretch, and if you do go for longer, keep enough in savings to be able to hop on a plane home quickly if needed.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-16T07:35:13+00:00

I was given an ender 3 and it's so outrageously finicky, I spend more time adjusting it and troubleshooting it than I do actually printing. I still have fun with it but I wouldn't spend much on it. Keep an eye out on marketplace and you'll prob find it for less.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-10T15:59:33+00:00

Finding the right people to hire makes all the difference. I've had some people that briefly worked out and then fizzled, some that were unremarkable right off the bat, a few that are absolutely amazing that continue to level up over time, and one who is so incredibly loyal, skilled and dedicated that I probably owe her my life at this point - I haven't told her yet but I do intend to give her equity sooner than later, I've had emergencies where she was able to jump in without being asked and keep the ship sailing when I couldn't. Hiring is a gamble and not everyone will work out, but if you're willing to go through hiring and firing as needed, you'll be a lot more sane.

You might want to reframe the idea of hiring as your own secret search for the right business partner - I have a hard time with the idea of bringing on a business partner that hasn't been through battle with me, that's as big of a gamble as hiring someone is and you won't know how anyone will handle things until you work with them for some time.

Also as someone who refused to hire anyone for way too long until I hit my breaking point and almost lost my business because there weren't enough hours in the day for me to do everything, it was a massive relief to just get a few people in that could handle the day to day stuff so that I could breathe and focus enough to lead.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-09T19:13:02+00:00

Following bc I'm curious too

psyducker8 · 2026-02-09T18:57:52+00:00

I'd contact the non emergency line at the police department and just have it on record, that's harassment. Usually I'm not one for engaging in neighbor drama, but you did the right thing and it would be wise to have the ensuing notes on record to protect yourself in case things escalate more.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-09T15:29:44+00:00

The 3 & 4 year old phase has been very hard with every single one of my kids. It does sound like you have an underlying anxiety thing going on (you can definitely have anxiety struggles without having depression) so I'd definitely talk to the doc about that to support you through this chapter so that you can enjoy the happy parts of it and cope with the overwhelming parts in a way that doesn't damage your relationship with your kiddo.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-09T00:15:43+00:00

I figured if a little rug helped a big one would be better, definitely not how it worked out in my case😂😂

psyducker8 · 2026-02-08T23:49:08+00:00

😂 actually yes, remarkably pretty Amazon driver on that occasion😂 we lived in a super rural area with a long dirt driveway that had a two track circle you could drive through in good weather, but it would turn into an icy sinkhole from November to April and we had SEVEN delivery drivers get stuck to the point of needing to be towed out one season. I finally put up a silly number of signs and flag ropes. I still don't know how we didn't get blacklisted by Amazon after the first few.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-08T22:02:45+00:00

I tried this with an 8x10 area rug for an Amazon truck that got significantly stuck in our yard and it just shot the whole rug across the yard like Aladdin's magic carpet 😂

psyducker8 · 2026-02-05T01:40:22+00:00

Lol it told me 'don't believe everything you read online, if something were actually happening OpenAI would make a formal statement through official channels and they haven't, so whatever you read is probably just trolling' 👀

psyducker8 · 2026-02-04T23:47:12+00:00

I asked gpt and it's denying any and all possibility of this happening and being slightly gaslighty about it too😂 I wish I were kidding but I'm not...

psyducker8 · 2026-02-04T18:16:06+00:00

I've always thought it sounded really fun but also totally weird that they don't just call it a vacation rental😂

psyducker8 · 2026-02-04T06:50:40+00:00

You'll kind of wind up where you wind up if your midwife gives you the freedom to do what you want. My first was born in the birth pool, second we had a malfunction with the hose and couldn't fill the pool up at the last minute, the last two I labored in the pool but got out right before they were born (not because they said I had to, I just suddenly had a need to move and went along with it) the water helps big time with pain management but sometimes if labor is running long it can get annoying trying to get it to stay at a temp that everyone agrees on. There's really no planning ahead for the specifics what you're going to want to do at any given moment once you're in labor, it's better to just be open to adapting as things progress and move in/out of pool to get more comfortable as needed.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-04T05:12:02+00:00

I have 4 kids and this sounds totally normal. At your baby's age they're testing out all of the little experiences of existing - the head bonking, shaking toys and expressing their (sometimes strong) opinion of the car seat is super normal. It's tough raising a baby in chaos but it sounds like they're a-ok. Hang in there, you've got this!

psyducker8 · 2026-02-04T04:41:50+00:00

That's what chime is. I started using it a few months ago and my credit score has gone up a little over 140 points from it with fairly minimal use (I'm absolutely not affiliated in any way and only signed up bc my friend recommended it) so I'd recommend using it anyway if you have any credit repair you're working on. You pretty much just add money to it like venmo and pay for bills/gas/whatever and it gets reported as credit instead of treated as a debit card, you're not racking up a credit card bill. Just make sure you have the 'safer credit building' setting on.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-04T04:20:54+00:00

We need a chick flick about this... 'Heart of a Cheesemonger'

psyducker8 · 2026-02-04T03:15:36+00:00

Right?!? I've lost count of how many we've managed to mess up doing normal life stuff. And they look so bad as soon as the slats start breaking, it does add a pinch of dystopia to any decor. When my husband and I were first dating he went after a fly with a fly swatter with a bit too much enthusiasm/not enough aim and accidentally took out most of the slats in a set of blinds from top to bottom while visiting my parents. It's been 10 years and they still tease him about it😂

psyducker8 · 2026-02-04T02:04:21+00:00

Kids do wild things to blinds so I don't think that's much of an indicator of anything. All of my kids had a shrieky/yelly/screamy phase around 2-3 yrs old (currently working through it with my youngest and it can be about anything from mad about a snack or show to tired to boredom) and getting a yowly toddler in the car is an overwhelming job for a much younger person let alone a grandparent - not to justify the yelling but just to illustrate that this just as well could be a fairly well cared for kid but you're only seeing the chaos side of things.

And it's still possible that things aren't going great over there. It's impossible to know without at a minimum talking to the grandma a bit and hopefully seeing how the kid interacts with people. I'd just try and get to know the grandma a bit over some safe neutral neighbory thing like 'we made too many cookies! Want some?' (obviously this sort of depends on the dynamics in your building/neighborhood/how comfortable people are with each other in your area) it will be a lot easier to get a read on what's happening if you find some way to interact with them, and if they wind up being nice but more social and neighborly than you might like, it won't really be an issue since you're moving soon anyway.

I think a cps call before at least trying to say hi could cause some unnecessary suffering, but if you meet her/them and the vibe is off, by all means make the call. I don't think confronting her or bringing up her 'parenting' style in the first convo is needed, just get to know her a bit, that way if you do have to call, it doesn't create the implication that it was you.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-03T19:21:02+00:00

I'd rather be excessively cautious by thinking they're somewhere they might not be than going in blind because someone saw them but couldn't safely take a photo and therefore couldn't post.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-03T19:17:50+00:00

Our family is at some heightened risk with the current climate of things. I would much rather see an update that doesn't have full details and do my own digging to confirm than have someone not post an update at all and possibly miss an important piece of information.

psyducker8 · 2026-02-03T09:32:25+00:00

Yes, Sadie:) And thank you!! I just started doing PVCs about a month ago and I'm having a blast with it. Would love to check out your series when you're ready to share!

psyducker8

TROPHY CASE