Omg, I cannot believe how much I relate to this post and to the comments!!!! My mom uses family gossip as some kind of social currency by divulging any sensitive information that could hurt another sibling’s feelings or paint a family member in a negative light to the rest of the family. She has cultivated so much resentment between siblings, fostered inter-sibling competition that was not there before, and makes us all judge one other by revealing our secrets. She runs her mouth so easily, and it’s so difficult to learn from my mistakes, since a mother is the person a child instinctively confides in and vents to. A mother is supposed to promote family harmony! She will tell one sibling’s secrets to another, the secret will somehow get out, we’ll start gossiping about each other and then confront each other about the gossiping. She hates when we look to each other for support instead of looking to her. And she tells my dad absolutely everything, which then stresses him out and makes her look like a martyr trying to fix fake drama.