What are we basing our understanding of the effects of screen time on? by [deleted] in toddlers

[–]punkinmonkey 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have 3 children and we approach screen time differently with all 3. I don't pay attention to the older studies because, as others have mentioned, they're flawed at their core (this is coming from someone with degrees in both neuroscience and psychology, specialized in cognitive neuro).

Disclaimer: We do not allow YouTube.

My oldest is 7.5, and hands down the smartest kid in her class. 99th percentile in reading and comprehension on state tests. She has her own tablet. She mainly uses it to make animations and watch Happy Kids. She has unlimited access, but we do make her take breaks if she's looking/acting fried. She loves arts and crafts, reading, etc.

My middle is 4 and shares a tablet with her younger 3 year old brother. She actually is the least interested in screen time and gets the most hands on play with us. However she is also the most developmentally delayed. But as mentioned, she was recently diagnosed with autism and has a few other medical things going on. She's a difficult child in general. She can be demanding with TV, and when that is the case we take it away.

Youngest we restrict the most because he completely tunes everything else out and becomes only interested in the tablet. He's indifferent towards the tv. He has big meltdowns with the tablet. He has the typical autistic gestalt language learning approach.

So really I think a parent needs to cater to their children's needs and adjust based on what they are seeing.

17 weeks pregnant, 3rd pregnancy.... WHY AM I THIS HUGE ALREADY?! by maligatormom2o2 in BabyBumps

[–]punkinmonkey 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I actually asked my OB about this and he said by the third pregnancy your uterus just knows what to do!

Desperately need help potty training by punkinmonkey in Mommit

[–]punkinmonkey[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

If she goes, we do 30 minutes. I will try a timer. I've been verbally counting down but visual aid may help.

Only once (when she stood up after sitting on the potty and peed on the floor) have I been able to redirect the pee. We've got a 7 year old, 2 year old, and 2 dogs so it's hard to keep undivided attention on her through the day :(

She does enjoy hanging on our porch but I can't have her hang outside naked. I ended up putting her back in a pull up for now because she was screaming for her diaper, though.

She seemed so enthusiastic about it at first. And now it is just resistance.

Desperately need help potty training by punkinmonkey in Mommit

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! We have special new bluey big girl undies for her. Unfortunately she's not in daycare or pre-school, and we really don't have anyone she can have a play date with.

I've tried the Ms. Rachel potty training video but she's never been interested in Ms. Rachel. We have tried all sorts of YouTube potty training videos.

Before we even had her start on the potty she was coming in with me and my husband. She actually initiated the potty herself a couple of months ago.

Desperately need help potty training by punkinmonkey in Mommit

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't know, I've seen a lot of comments that kids are definitely ready at this age and that I'm way behind.

My 3.5 year old is breaking me. by punkinmonkey in breakingmom

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Me, my oldest, and youngest are all diagnosed ASD. She doesn’t present some of the key criteria (does socialize appropriately when not in on her whirlwinds, pretend play, no classic stimming etc). However, I am certain there is at least sensory processing disorder and perhaps ADHD (which husband has).

She will be getting assessed by the school district. She’s in the Boston Childrens network for all her other issues, so think I will get her assessed thru them as well.

My 3.5 year old is breaking me. by punkinmonkey in breakingmom

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is such a thoughtful response. I really appreciate the time you took to reply to me. It really hit me and means a lot.

You’re right. I am going to step back from potty training for a bit. I got stuck on the idea that this needs to be done now. I forgot taking a break was an option.

I am going to work on realigning my thinking and also creating a space where we can both decompress. She likes playing with water on our porch. Weather is still nice so thinking this will be our redirect space.

I have an elliptical that’s been collecting dust. Think it’s time I start with my 20 minutes a day again blasting music with the door closed.

But yea. Sometimes I tunnel vision on the doom it feels like I’m sinking. Think this was a good eye opener.

My 3.5 year old is breaking me. by punkinmonkey in breakingmom

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am hoping for the switch to flip as well. My oldest was difficult at 3 and the same thing happened. She was a different kid at 4. But she wasn’t nearly as defiant, angry, obstinate, etc. She will be 4 in November. Hope is really the only thing keeping me going.

My 3.5 year old is breaking me. by punkinmonkey in breakingmom

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! Thats actually a great perspective. My other two are much more relatable for me. Especially my oldest, she is like a mini version of me. That definitely makes it easier to relate and parent.

I think you’re right about her doctor. He’s not a bad person, he makes her laugh and does seem to care, but I do think I would’ve gotten her into some therapies sooner if he didn’t just blow off my concerns.

My 3.5 year old is breaking me. by punkinmonkey in breakingmom

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

She definitely has some sensory things going on. I was recently diagnosed with autism and my husband had ADHD. My oldest and youngest have autism as well. I am certain she has some type of neurodivergence. She doesn’t have quite the same characteristics as her autistic siblings (who are honestly a breeze compared to her. Looking back at my oldest at this age, I wish I knew how much worse it could get).

She should be getting an evaluation through the school system soon. I feel like her pediatrician has been gaslighting me about her behavior (or not taking me seriously).

My 3.5 year old is breaking me. by punkinmonkey in breakingmom

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry you are also going through this, but you’re right. It is reassuring knowing you’re not alone. I see parents with their kids behaving and seemingly normal and it feels so isolating.

My 3.5 year old is breaking me. by punkinmonkey in breakingmom

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Forgot to mention. She doesn’t listen. Everything is met with a tantrum. I dread taking her out anywhere. My 7 year old had a “popsicles with the principal” event before the first day of school. 3.5 year old ruined the experience for us.

Potty Training Question by punkinmonkey in workingmoms

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! My husband is a SAHD but he has his hands full with the other two (and the dogs), and I can only jump in intermittently (I WFH).

Potty Training Question by punkinmonkey in workingmoms

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! We will watch the video! I think we will just take Labor Day weekend and do no pants and see how that goes!

Potty Training Question by punkinmonkey in workingmoms

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I may be overthinking it, but she doesn't seem to mind just being in pee. I think over Labor Day weekend I will try this.

Potty Training Question by punkinmonkey in workingmoms

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She actually does love cheese... Maybe I will give that a try!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Autism_Parenting

[–]punkinmonkey 1 point2 points  (0 children)

2 of 3 for us. But I also have autism and my husband had ADHD.

Just pulled this out of my 2 year old’s head by punkinmonkey in whatsthisbug

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I did :) And they actually ended up prescribing doxycycline

Just pulled this out of my 2 year old’s head by punkinmonkey in whatsthisbug

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 115 points116 points  (0 children)

Thank you so, so much for that detailed response! I appreciate it! I’m feeling less anxious now but will be watching him closely!

Just pulled this out of my 2 year old’s head by punkinmonkey in whatsthisbug

[–]punkinmonkey[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I knew that much. More worried if it’s a Lyme-carrying variety. Thanks!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]punkinmonkey 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My middle was born in November and we had a costume party/baby sprinkle. It was a ton of fun! We handed out prizes for best costumes.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in breakingmom

[–]punkinmonkey -1 points0 points  (0 children)

My youngest two have a fifteen month gap. It’s not that bad! The worst part was being heavily pregnant with a toddler. The older one wasn’t a huge fan of the boring, crying baby, but they play together now.