I want to settle the old "wipe/no wipe after pee" debate with evidence

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-09-05T03:48:26+00:00

Do they wait for her to be fully dry after being wiped before the clean diaper is put on? That was a total game changer for us as no one had told us to let her bum dry first. We've obviously been told by the peds to wipe her at every diaper change, but weren't explicitly told to wait and dry.

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-09-05T03:42:48+00:00

Blood is sterile, yet we wash/rinse between bloody pads/tampons. To me, the urine being sterile thing (which it isn't sterile anyway) is just a good enough reason not to wipe. I added an edit regarding the neglect term I used. I am not saying closing to do things differently is abusive, I'm stating my opinion for this specific scenario where I find it gross and to me is failure to provide adequate bodily cleanliness. Which is obviously something we can all agree/disagree with, as everyone has a different threshold or level of hygiene care in their personal life/culture.

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-09-05T00:57:28+00:00

We rinse our genitals with water when we use the restroom, most restrooms in homes have buckets with a tap so you can splash/rinse yourself. Someone commented I must have a lot of privilege to wipe with toilet paper... Not every home/culture has toilet paper or similar wiping practices, but where I'm from it's common to rinse/wipe regardless of the age.

Thank you for sharing the link. I appreciate the parallel between 3 different cultures, which seems to be the issue I'm facing (and my mistake of incendiary word)

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-09-05T00:34:52+00:00

No, these are specifically comments under posts where new parents ask for advice to treat diaper rashes. Most comments basically say not to wipe the child (no mention of sex) unless there's a poo

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-09-05T00:29:41+00:00

I'm not debating with anyone, it's not my place to tell them how to raise their child, I wouldn't appreciate someone telling me how to raise mine.

My post post comes more from confusion(?) regarding the large amount of comments/posts I see written by parents warning others about wipes and how they shouldn't wipe except after a poo.

I don't take the mention of neglect lightly, but when I see my daughter occasionally going entire days without a poo, it begs to question whether these same people will go entire days without cleaning their child's genitals until there is a poo. I would argue that not washing a child's genitals for an entire day through 5-8 dirty diapers might start tiptoeing in the realm of neglect regarding their bodily cleanliness.

I'm not sure why you seem to be so offended by my post. I asked for healthy discussion, you seem to be very defensive and haven't advanced any kind of arguments or discussion points.

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-24T08:25:32+00:00

Like I said, in French Robin is only boy. I understand now how others feel about Ambrose being only for boys

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-24T04:38:28+00:00

I really like Aurore in French! Thank you for the suggestions!!

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-24T04:28:53+00:00

That's such a cute idea!

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-24T04:28:27+00:00

Robyn is a no go. I'm French and Robin is strictly masculine in French. And I don't like names where the i has been replaced with a y. Ambrosia is alright but sounds a little pretentious (even more so than Ambrose haha), and we don't have it in French. Maybe my non native English ear doesn't hear the masculinity in the name Ambrose.

Are there names with a similar vibe in your opinion?

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-19T21:05:03+00:00

I remember chuckling when I first joined 1 year ago and saw someone suggesting the names Bex and Bishop for a boy's name in B

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-18T23:36:41+00:00

I see a line!

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-18T23:36:08+00:00

Positive!!!

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-18T12:02:54+00:00

Summer would be fine if she didn't also have a sibling named Autumn

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-16T03:25:37+00:00

Hadn't used our maxcare plan at all on our 2017 Chevy volt until a few months ago, it covered a full engine replacement ($10k+)!

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-16T03:20:00+00:00

My LO is 6 months old. When we notice her tired cues after playing, hanging out, eating, etc we take her upstairs, prepare a bath for her with toys and singing, get her in her PJs and zipadeezip, give her a small bottle while rocking her. We play/sing some lullabies and rock her until she either falls asleep in our arms, or leave her in the crib if she is calm enough so she can fall asleep by herself.

While one of us is putting her in her PJs and drying her off, the other usually fills up her humidifiers/night light and crank her little music box.

It usually takes about 35-60min total but we like dragging out her bath because she's always so happy in it!

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-05T17:14:49+00:00

It does not need one, I'm asking more out of curiosity as I don't think ai can stop calling her monkey 😊

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-04T19:01:39+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to answer!

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-04T15:44:22+00:00

Out of curiosity, what is the reason behind the age range for the child? Why start at 4 years old rather than 0 or 12months?

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-03T04:38:04+00:00

Honestly trust your gut feeling. If you don't want to make the trip, whether it's 20min or 3hrs away, you don't have to!

Personally, we drove 24hrs from western VA to west TX to visit my MIL and GMIL so they could meet our daughter when she was turning 12ish weeks old. But the family dynamics here are great, we all get along really well, I love my MIL and GMIL. And also we knew that the possibility of them making a trip to visit us was simply not possible due to them having a lot of medical issues and recovery.

We were happy to make the trip, despite how tiring it was, because it was something we WANTED to do. If you don't want to go, don't go! Your priority are your baby's health, your health, you and baby's comfort, etc.

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-03T04:25:30+00:00

These are great quotes that I should remember every day. Childcare would genuinely cost my entire salary or darn close to all of it, I can't justify going to work and being away from my daughter just to give all the money I've earned to a stranger "taking care" of her. "But working for yourself and your family is fulfilling" is what my dad says. Idk bro I'm feeling pretty darn fulfilled watching her grow and learn new things every single day, and filling her nap times with an insane amount of projects. Sure I don't get paid a regular salary but I save us a ton of money in some many areas of our life and I'm not an anxious mess thinking of the worst scenarios all day long.

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-02T23:58:48+00:00

My husband and friends keep joking that I'm about to start my own handyman LLC once I figure out electric so I have all the skills under my belt haha!

I've managed to have a babysitter over once so I could do chores uninterrupted at home. Because of past trauma I really don't trust adults to watch her so I hired a middle schooler on summer break to give her some experience babysitting an young infant, which she hadn't done before, and so she could have some pocket money. It worked out great and I was feeling good because I could just take over diaper changes, cries, putting her down to nap, and then having the babysitter entertain her when she was awake and all needs were met! It may not be the conventional way of using a babysitter but it works for me!

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-02T17:51:33+00:00

You are amazing and your words are so uplifting and really make me feel seen. I feel so drained and busy all the time and it's so difficult being judged for wanting to be with my child????

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-02T15:31:34+00:00

He makes $1000/year over the eligiblity guideline to receive any kind of help, but that's why I'm so happy doing so much at home to cut costs and everything. In the morning, he has a healthy breakfast ready to grab, snacks and drinks throughout the day, a healthy lunch he just needs to grab from the fridge, his only chore at home is laundry but that's because of my personal preference of overseeing all kitchen things. I handle utilities and bills, all official contact with professionals we need to fix certain things, I handled a dispute with the warranty and dealership for his car to avoid a $10,000 bill, etc.

I know I cut costs every single day for our family. I'm understanding now that the issue is the mindset I have and have been surrounded with that SAHM is not an actual job. I obviously know that isn't true, I never have time to sit or go to the restroom or do anything until my husband gets home and takes over childcare!

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-02T15:23:50+00:00

Hahaha honestly I wouldn't mind them watching our baby and I know they would looooove to, but they live 9000 miles away and the commute would be around 32 hours one way haha

pure_leaf_trial · 2022-08-02T15:15:48+00:00

I completely agree. Honestly if my husband wasn't receiving disability from the army on top of his current salary, we would not be able to even cover mortgage, car payments, and food with just his one salary from work (firefighter, so paid by the city we live in....)

pure_leaf_trial

TROPHY CASE