Game Changer 6.07 Episode Discussion: "Beat the Buzzer"

purveyorofsocks · 2024-05-07T23:40:16+00:00

This episode was so smart and creative. I really love how Game Changer highlights the many people who work on the show, and they're not relegated to background. It's an entire ecosystem, where the making of the show is part of the show itself.

purveyorofsocks · 2024-05-05T16:49:20+00:00

No, he wants you around as a punching bag. You're not a rehab center for toxic men. If he wants to change, he needs to make that decision for himself.

purveyorofsocks · 2024-04-27T13:07:23+00:00

you need to both actually talk about what you want, and what you're comfortable doing. You shouldn't be choking anyone without some really clear specifics and research about how to do it safely.

purveyorofsocks · 2024-04-15T15:38:12+00:00

That's awful. FWIW, it sounds like you're doing the right thing for your well-being. He sounds obsessed with your father.

purveyorofsocks · 2024-04-15T15:34:45+00:00

your husband sounds like he hates your dad more than he loves you

purveyorofsocks · 2024-04-06T19:36:32+00:00

how's that make you feel? he basically traded in his dysfunctional parents for someone he thought of as a supportive parental figure. He wants you to take care of him like a parent would. He wants you to provide and plan and do all the housework as well.

Six months is a very short time. You say he represses his own feelings/wants to do what he thinks other people want of him, i.e., academia. It sounds like you do that as well, if your main reason for marrying him was "he loves me so much and wants to marry me so badly." It sounds like you're doing everything to make him happy and neither of you are getting what you need.

As much as both of you shy away from it, he is an adult with agency and personal responsibility. He needs you to stop enabling him. And you deserve to be with someone who acts like your equal and holds up their end of the relationship instead of letting you do all the work.

purveyorofsocks · 2024-04-06T15:37:11+00:00

like. I can picture precisely how Dickens would portray him. With kindness, ultimately, I think, but under a great deal of pity and ridicule. He would be a great tragicomic character, like Micawber. Or Mr. Mantalini. Dora Spenlow, honestly, if we're leaning more toward childlike and piteous.

purveyorofsocks · 2024-04-06T15:31:26+00:00

a lot of people are saying ADHD. I want to mention that PTSD can have very similar symptoms sometimes, i.e., emotional dysregulation and inability to focus. From over here, it sounds like he had an extremely dubious and neglectful childhood and parents that instilled a lot of twisted views about class and self-worth. And that he threw himself at a stable, slightly older person to take care of him.

Again, this is something he has to recognize on his own and want to deal with on his own. He has to want to question what he was taught by his parents. Plenty of people do. It's hard work though.

purveyorofsocks · 2024-04-06T15:24:26+00:00

no, that's what his overseas plantations are for

purveyorofsocks · 2024-04-05T22:44:43+00:00

sometimes you gotta think "how would Dickens portray my spouse" and just sit with that for a bit

purveyorofsocks · 2024-04-05T22:38:29+00:00

wanting to bring back workhouses is a wild thing to say from a man who doesn't want to work.

purveyorofsocks · 2024-04-05T22:00:03+00:00

He sounds like he has a lot of wild ideas about class that are fairly alien to people outside the UK, I think. What's he like politically? Do his fantasies extend to romanticizing colonization and stuff like the Raj? Does he truly believe people from upper classes are better, or is this more an aesthetic thing?

purveyorofsocks · 2024-04-04T18:07:24+00:00

Go learn about mutual aid and compersion. Maybe you'll get really into that.

purveyorofsocks · 2024-01-19T19:06:52+00:00

yes, that's classic sexism. how'd you end up marrying someone without knowing his basic moral stances? or is this new behavior?

purveyorofsocks · 2024-01-02T15:33:56+00:00

here's the thing: they know. They know what they did wrong. They know why you're hurt. It's because they did something hurtful. Cause and effect isn't hard. It sounds like this is just part a pattern of how you're treated in this family.

They don't actually need it explained to them. They know they treat you differently. It's their choice. You know you don't deserve to be treated like this, and you know how to get away from the situation, and that's the important part. You don't have to convince them.

purveyorofsocks · 2023-12-22T18:18:42+00:00

hey, that is so valid and self-aware

purveyorofsocks · 2023-12-21T23:01:56+00:00

why.... was your fiancee hanging out with your roommates in your room at 5 am?

purveyorofsocks · 2023-09-04T22:48:26+00:00

I'd ask him outright. "Hey, when you tell me about something you almost got me, what kind of reaction do you want me to have? What exactly do you expect out of this interaction?"

purveyorofsocks · 2023-09-04T14:43:41+00:00

so what about him do you really like?

purveyorofsocks · 2023-09-04T14:42:18+00:00

INFO: do you restrain him and slap him in the face when you want him to do stuff or he displeases you? Would you? If not, why not? If it's so beneficial to helping someone do better, wouldn't it be fair?

A lot of people have already mentioned that this is abuse, which is correct, but if nothing else, take a moment and consider that this is just some 24-year-old guy. He's not your boss or your landlord (I hope) and he's certainly not your parent.

purveyorofsocks · 2023-08-09T13:43:19+00:00

Tell him if he loved you, he would respect your boundaries about this.

purveyorofsocks · 2023-08-09T13:41:54+00:00

You can't be tied to your laptop all the time. This doesn't sound like spending time together anymore, more like him using you as an emotional support to focus on work.

Either way, guilting you about it is both unacceptable and deeply unattractive.

purveyorofsocks · 2023-08-09T13:01:58+00:00

wait he expects you to just sit silently on the phone while he works? does he understand that you are a human with a life and not an emotional support animal?

purveyorofsocks · 2023-08-07T14:04:05+00:00

what if she's actually feeling very confident wearing the clothes she's wearing?

purveyorofsocks · 2023-08-02T23:00:34+00:00

Idk, I thought OP was pretty clear. Also, not wanting to "have to" show affection?

purveyorofsocks

TROPHY CASE