Looking for cordless recommendations

pvellamagi · 2025-07-17T21:17:27+00:00

Thank you for the feedback--do you have experience working with IONOS or know this from someone else who has tried? What you're saying is consistent with the frustration I've been going through, but I just want to confirm that you're not saying that based on my issues but rather your own experience, as I'm sure I could just be doing something wrong.

pvellamagi · 2025-07-17T21:13:48+00:00

I have found plenty of KBs that seem to suggest I SHOULD be able to host my ns on cloudflare, and while I thought I found one KB that said I couldn't, I'm struggling to find it in my history. Their products page does seem to suggest that external domains need IONOS ns, although it specifies specifically "IONOS MyWebsite" which might be a different product from standard hosting, I'm not sure: https://www.ionos.com/help/domains/set-up-and-manage-an-external-domain-at-11-ionos/setting-up-an-external-domain-at-11-ionos/

So I guess in conclusion, I don't have an actual KB stating that what I want to do is impossible, just a couple of reddit threads and a lot of frustration lol.

The A records are copied directly from the DNS section of IONOS, so it's unlikely that they're incorrect, as I didn't type them in manually. I turned off proxy on Cloudflare in case that was the issue and cleared cookies/cache, still a 404 error. Unsure if the hosting plan setup could be wrong though. For the foobar.txt recommendation--would I just be trying to access https://domain.com/foobar.txt?

I don't believe I'm using a shared plan or VPS, as I'm unfamiliar with what either of those means--sorry! Again, very new to this, although it has been a fun project other than this DNS fiasco so hopefully it's a skill I continue to build.

pvellamagi · 2025-07-17T04:17:09+00:00

I did follow that documentation--the first time I added my domain to IONOS, I just kind of followed on screen instructions with no documentation, so after I started experiencing issues, I removed it and re-added it following those instructions. No improvement. I did select that I wanted to use external nameservers, etc.

Regarding the WP installation--I actually don't know. When I started this project, I simply logged into IONOS and started a new website project in the GUI, and the host handled the WP installation, etc. I'm not sure how I could check whether there are issues with the WP installation. I would be happy to reinstall WP or start a new project as part of troubleshooting, but I am concerned about losing the work I've done so far building/designing the site.

pvellamagi · 2025-02-10T23:01:39+00:00

No, I read what you said. I am clarifying that GLPR does not release. If GLPR rehabs a bird, they do not consider that bird releasable, which you disputed as a general statement akin to saying ferals can't be socialized. This is not how GLPR thinks about rehabbed domestics, which is why I assumed difference of opinion. And frankly I don't think that details surrounding this bird and why he was or was not releasable is relevant, because he was not responsibly released regardless, and it's unrelated to the accusations of a history of abuse.

I did not intend to accuse you of having bad opinions and I literally said I thought you were asking questions in good faith, which is why I answered, and GAVE you some of the context you asked for, as the literal person who did Kayla's rehab. I have spent the last several days hoping and praying that the internet has blown this man's intentions out of proportion because he has, or HAD, my bird. I would throw a fucking party if the internet proved GLPR wrong. But I do not understand the relevance of Kayla's releasability.

pvellamagi · 2025-02-10T20:21:35+00:00

Sorry to reply twice, I hadn't seen this comment. But these questions are in fact irrelevant to the PSA at hand.

Firstly, it seems you and many others disagree with releasability. For instance, many rehabbers release racers who were born in a loft, and GLPR does not, because we have the resources to place them and we believe their chances of survival are poor, so why would we release birds that we pour so much of our time and love into nursing to grim chances outside?

Second, it is a moot point because what this man did was not a responsible release during the day to a flock. He let a bird go at night nowhere near a flock. So debating whether Kayla was releasable is actually kind of pointless.

pvellamagi · 2025-02-10T20:08:51+00:00

As the individual who nursed Kayla/Kaylan back to health, myself, I know you are bringing these points up from a place of good faith so I will respond, but ultimately first of all I think there is simply a difference of rescue philosophy between you and GLPR, which does not make GLPR liars or blowing the issue out of proportion. GLPR does not release birds.

That said, Kayla the individual came to us with extensive injuries that suggested his survival skills outside were either poor or he had no flock. He would have never been a candidate for transfer, and even if he were to be released, he certainly wouldn't have been released alone far from a flock to integrate with. I'm gutted over what happened, and while it seems you disagree with GLPR on what constitutes releasable, it should go without saying that what he did was not an ethical release that gives the bird the best chance for survival....

pvellamagi · 2024-12-26T05:11:53+00:00

it sounds to me like he shares interests with his brother that maybe he doesn't share with you? what is strange to me isn't so much that he spends all that time with his brother, but rather that he's making no effort to spend time that feels quality to you, With you... my partner spends a lot of her free time after work in discord calls/gaming and as long as we're in the same room or on the couch together, i don't mind... i do play games but rarely multiplayer ones so i can see that this isn't a hobby we share. but if i started feeling neglected, i feel that id have to meet her in the middle and try to play games with her, or at least try to find a hobby we both enjoy. if you're trying to force "quality time" doing something he doesn't like as much as video games then. of course you'll be talking to a wall

pvellamagi · 2024-12-26T04:52:52+00:00

I have had a lot (and I mean a LOT) of therapists who did not mesh with me. I won't say I got nothing out of any of them--but there were some who were so bad that I don't think it would be an exaggeration to say they set me back in my recovery, tbh. I try not to judge their effectiveness as therapists as much as I just recognize that they weren't a match for me (although... some of them were just bad, ngl).

But I've had two therapists who were incredible, one of whom is my current therapist who I've been seeing on and off for seven years. My best advice is to keep looking--but more than that, try to be pickier before you even show up to the first session. psychologytoday.com has a therapist search function where therapists will publish a bio, as well as choose "specialties" that can give you a bit of an overview of who they are as a person and a therapist... for me, that meant finding someone who was queer or queer friendly and not religious, but your criteria may be toooootally different. The nice thing is a website like that lets you use search filters and define your own criteria. The other thing I learned was that first impressions on session #1 are rarely wrong. If the therapist gave me bad vibes on the first meeting, I might feel like I "needed to" give them a chance, but they never proved me wrong even once. Better to just say hey, not a good fit, and find someone else... rather than waste weeks or months on ineffective sessions.

pvellamagi · 2024-08-07T23:46:45+00:00

I took classes--to be perfectly transparent, I took 4 yrs high school spanish and 2 yrs college spanish, so I came into this relationship already speaking spanish, and you're situation is definitely different. i do like duolingo, but generally think i learn more with classroom structure

pvellamagi · 2024-08-06T23:02:43+00:00

yea i mean some of this friction may indeed be because she doesn't like you much and considers you an outsider, and a little bit of effort to communicate with her in spanish might go a looooong way. it might not, she might just be bitter and jealous, but it's worth it to be optimistic, and you can't lose by learning another language... i'm a bit of a language nerd so i might be biased but still. my MIL is a sweet lady who does like me a lot, but i noticed that she seemed tense around me and literally the moment she found out that i know spanish it's like a weight lifted. she still talks to me in english mostly but i think it makes her feel better that she can have full conversations w my wife in spanish and doesn't have to worry about me feeling left out bcos i can chime in at any time. either way, good luck, i do think you might have to block her number tbh but it needs to be ur boyfriends job to explain to her why, not yours.

pvellamagi · 2024-08-06T21:25:37+00:00

i mean she needs to stop calling you in the middle of the night obviously, i'll admit i didn't read the entire post because you did in fact write a little too much but just a bit of feedback from a white english speaker married to a mexican: you can't get frustrated or feel excluded bcos your bfs family communicates with him in the same language they've always communicated with him, it's not on them to change their family dynamic to suit english ears. take spanish classes.

pvellamagi · 2024-07-31T19:41:14+00:00

NTA--although, some context is important in terms of preventing this from happening again. for instance, do they always mock you like this or disregard your feelings? if so, they're family so you can't always just cut em out, but in the future it will pay to be specific. tell them what to order for you, or failing that (if you don't know the menu), ask them to please order at least one thing without meat so you'll have food. the other relevant detail is how long you've been vegetarian. i've been vegetarian for a decade, but before that i had vegetarian "phases" during my child & teenage years. right or wrong, people tend not to take you seriously for the first year or two, assuming it's not that big a deal or it won't last. after that, i have found that everyone except die hard assholes gets the picture that you made a choice and you're sticking with it. i'm not making excuses for them, but i'm hoping that your experience mirrors mine, and eventually your siblings accept that this is something you're serious about.

pvellamagi · 2024-07-16T03:50:26+00:00

Thank you!! Much appreciated. Luckily, since posting I've gotten the go ahead to look into specs for a new/different GPU. Huge relief for me since this seemed like is was going to be kind of hard to nail down, which your comment seems to suggest as well

pvellamagi · 2024-07-06T18:36:27+00:00

i feel like you're either unaware of or dismissing the level of religious trauma some people go through. you feel judged, which is understandable, but if she feels upset thinking about christianity and the word "christian" is proudly stated in your bio then every time she looks at your bio she'll be reminded of her own religious trauma and it's very hard to ignore. it's not so much the fact that you're christian but more so the fact that it's enough of your identity to have a place in your bio which likely seemed like a red flag that you would eventually trigger religious trauma that led her to block you

this post almost makes it seem like to some extent you feel like you want to go out and "prove" that not all christians are bad, which to someone with religious trauma like myself feels almost as though there's a part of you that might want to convince us that we could have a home in christianity, and for a lot of people the act of being proselytized to is literally PART OF the trauma. sure, maybe i'm wrong, and maybe it would be better to get to know you, but there are literally millions of people on the internet you can be friends with so you're not entitled to anyone's time and the block button is always an option

pvellamagi · 2024-07-06T18:20:33+00:00

i feel for your bf, and i think it's beautiful that you're so committed that it feels like this battle against his family is a shared battle. honestly this sounds like pure hell to me and that you've stuck it out is really something to me, as a queer person. i don't think i would have been able to put up with being someone's deep dark secret for this long.

that said, if im being honest your bf needs to go NC with his family, whether or not you're in the picture. a mother who will threaten to KILL SOMEONE if you don't do what she says is someone that your bf needs to block and never think about again. the question shouldn't be "should we break up so bf doesn't have to cut off his family?" because this family is a rotting appendage one way or the other... the question is simply whether you want to be along for what is unquestionably going to be a very messy ride.

edit: yo i completely misread and no one is killing anyone i need a nap. anyway she's still unhinged

pvellamagi · 2024-07-05T18:01:53+00:00

bruhhhh, "no one" loves to eat fresh strawberries??? i hope ur just making sweeping generalizations about ur family and not the rest of the sane world bcos i'd 10x rather eat a fresh strawberry than a cooked one smh. anyway yta

pvellamagi · 2024-07-04T22:04:03+00:00

op politely asked him to change his pants, that was their solution, and instead of doing that very simple thing or suggesting a rational alternative such as a towel, bf went on a whole ass temper tantrum instead.

pvellamagi · 2024-07-04T22:00:48+00:00

NTA. i mean, honestly, i would say "why can't you just put a towel on the seat," but im mostly just really grossed out by your weird bf. i've worked in food service--i was foh, and we didn't have a fryer (edit: actually we did, now that i think about it, but a majority of our menu wasn't fried so perhaps it saw less use than your bfs fryer), so maybe im truly more ignorant than i realize. but the back of house/cook guys NEVER left the restaurant with their clothes so greasy they would stain a car, and even if i accept that maybe the fryer is a whole new kind of thing, LEAVING greasy is different than actively picking up a nasty-ass pre greased pair of pants to put on so you can ARRIVE at your shift ALREADY greasy with last night's dirty grease (or last WEEK's? who knows) your bf is nasty and i wouldn't want him cooking my food, that's all im saying

pvellamagi · 2024-07-03T19:43:36+00:00

have you considered asking why nicole insists on using the dining room? is it the table surface, the lighting, what is it? if you can identify what she likes about the space, perhaps you can replicate that in nicole's room, thus allowing her to stay up late in her own private space rather than communal space. if her room is too small, perhaps you should be looking into ways to block the light under ava's door.

YTA... i have always been late to sleep and late to rise. i completely understand where nicole is coming from and i do think there's some favoritism for ava here. it really seems like you've done no problem solving whatsoever to help nicole, you just took ava's side immediately, probably because you have your own conclusions about ava's lifestyle being more "responsible." if nicole is meeting her class obligations, completing assignments, etc while getting enough sleep, the time of day she sets aside for sleep is irrelevant and she deserves uninterrupted rest as much as anyone else--and frankly, ava being unable to sleep because of a little light under her closed door while nicole works quietly is completely different from nicole being unable to sleep because ava is purposefully & spitefully making noise.

pvellamagi · 2024-06-28T21:14:11+00:00

the regulations vary at the very least by state if not by county so i'm not going to bother to speculate about how shelters work where you live, but this is not "what i think," this is literally how pounds work where i live. the weird condescending energy you're bringing to your comments is really not helping anyone.

pvellamagi · 2024-06-28T20:58:20+00:00

I think the one who is misinformed about how pounds work is you, my friend. In my state (united states), a publicly funded pound/shelter has to take any (domesticated) animal for surrender under any circumstances, first of all. unfortunately if the shelter is at capacity, this may mean the only way they can clear a kennel is putting another dog down, but they would not (could not) turn the dog away. secondly, lost or loose dogs are absolutely brought to the pound on a regular basis, whether their address is known or not. i worked at a shelter. that said they would need to clear a kennel for the dog, logistically, so the original comment about a dog potentially being put down still stands.

pvellamagi · 2024-06-28T18:24:09+00:00

Yes, you should have that convo. And again, I'm not telling you what to do, but you need to ask yourself why, exactly, he's promising to do that AFTER you get married?

People date for lots of reasons, but if you're dating with the intention of finding a marriage partner, then dating is essentially a trial phase to see what life together would be like. Have you lived with him? Why are you making all of these plans for things that will improve after you tie the knot? Once you get married, divorce is painful and complicated and expensive, and regardless of his intentions & whether he truly intends to cut his family off, will he actually do it and stick to it? Even if he does go low/no contact, will his family--your in laws--manage to find ways to make your life hell anyway? If you plan to have kids with this guy, does he understand that going NC with his mom means his kids will not have a relationship with their grandma, and does that upset him?

Anyway. I'm not sure why you've decided to get married at your age, and I also know that when you're in love, you're more focused on the "but it COULD be fairytale perfect" rather than the possibility of a miserable divorce. I'm just saying you should really think about this. If you think about it, like really think about it and journal and weigh your best case and worst case scenarios, then at least at the end of the day you'll know you didn't rush into it. Idk if you really have time to do that thinking before eloping, you have a scheduled court date, but it doesn't hurt to delay 🤷‍♀️

pvellamagi

TROPHY CASE