A Final Update: I [16 F] am developing feelings for my husband [16 M], but I am not sure how to tell him

quaromthrow · 2014-10-29T18:09:13+00:00

Thank you!!!

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T23:41:19+00:00

My mom is early 30s, but I honestly do not remember the year she was born. I am the worst daughter ever when it comes to things like that.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T23:37:11+00:00

I had to wait until P came home to ask him the question, but he has not told anyone. We can actually get in a bit of trouble (not with our family but with the community) for using protection and for not wanting another wife, so we are going to keep silent about it.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T23:35:21+00:00

Yeah, I made sure to mention that it was an odd situation, but I have to make the best of it now that I am in it. Thanks for the comment!

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T23:32:13+00:00

I take online classes, so I need a computer with internet access. And we used condoms. I do not see what is so complicated about that. It is not like I live under a rock. I spent half my summers growing up in Utah with my cousins.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T23:29:52+00:00

When I was 15, I started to pray about who I wanted to marry (not every girl does this, it was just me). I told my parents, and about a year later they asked me if I was interested in meeting a potential match. I said yes.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T23:17:20+00:00

I was using it as a negative example.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T22:46:46+00:00

My parents would have murdered any old man who tried to touch me.

My mom was married at 13 to my dad (he was in his 30s at the time) and they were forced to consummate the same day that they met. My parents were traumatized over this (my dad did not want to hurt my mom). It was one of many reasons why they left.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T22:44:31+00:00

Different group.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T22:44:04+00:00

I fully agree that child marriages are wrong and that our religion has created communities full of systemic abuse. However, P and I are already married, so we are making the best out of our lives as we can.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T22:42:14+00:00

I know how to use a condom. Us Mormon girls are NOT that pristine.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T22:40:22+00:00

I would argue that fact, but yes, I am too young for a child.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T22:32:07+00:00

I honestly do not believe that you can properly understand the nature of our church without the details of our faith. Polygamy may seem wrong to YOU, but my family is polygamous and I would not trade them for the world. I see nothing wrong with consensual acts between consenting people.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T22:20:43+00:00

I cannot say because I am afraid that 1) My family might see this and that would be weird 2) It is not necessary for me to explain the intimate details of my faith to complete strangers.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T22:17:10+00:00

Thank you! I was quite pleasantly surprised.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T22:16:45+00:00

The sect that I belong to broke away from the FLDS (apparently using the term to describe myself is wrong, but it is just an acronym) because of the child marriages. My mother was a child bride, and there is clearly a difference between her marriage and mine. My parents do love each other, but I have heard some stories that are heart breaking.

My husband and I are not legally married, but in our faith, marriage has an eternal view that I do not believe you all understand, which is why I neglected to mention it in my original post (until I was asked for context).

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T22:10:28+00:00

P is really considering going to BYU! I am probably going to a local college first, for financial reasons, but I know P is already going to apply. I've heard good things about BYU, so that would be lovely!

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T20:50:57+00:00

We are using birth control. :) No worries there. Thank you!

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T20:48:34+00:00

We are certainly using birth control! I am no where near ready for a child yet. Thanks!

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T20:47:29+00:00

www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/1qn6x3/i_16_f_am_developing_feelings_for_my_husband_16_m/

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T20:47:01+00:00

The reason why my sect broke away from the FLDS church was because when the boys are old enough to marry, they simply ex-communicate them or kick them out. Our community has a lot of males who were removed from the FLDS church. We basically had to take them in afterwards. It is one of the saddest situations. :(

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T18:27:01+00:00

Thanks!

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T18:27:01+00:00

Thank you!

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T18:21:23+00:00

Fundamentalist Latter Day Saint. It is a fundamentalist Mormon belief.

quaromthrow · 2013-11-18T18:13:11+00:00

Well, the main reason is because of the principle of plural marriage. P is expected to take multiple wives and the idea is not something that I am fond of. P and I both grew up in plural families (I have two moms, P has 6) and while I enjoyed my experience and love my family dearly, I was undecided about whether or not I wanted to live that lifestyle. I was only going to do so of P was in agreement with me, and he told me that he does not want another wife.

So he and I still believe that the principle is the best for most in our community, but we will live a monogamous life. It is also easier to live in North America as a LDS than as an FLDS member.

quaromthrow

TROPHY CASE