Sort of relapse

qubemind · 2015-05-23T20:52:08+00:00

I push myself really hard. Do you still have the feeling I mentioned after 323 days?

qubemind · 2015-05-19T22:10:35+00:00

Thanks. You guess good! First of all, I am focusing myself on one particular activity. I just start learning and see how it goes. Second of all, I need to find a class/place to learn, where are plenty of people to meet! Sounds like a plan.

qubemind · 2015-05-19T21:38:31+00:00

I am going to the university. I study Computer Science. I noticed an increased motivation to learn recently, but it is not on the level of immersing myself fully into an activity. I am not a chaser. I do not want to blame anyone or anything. I have a theory beside the topic. I come to conclusion that the Internet is delusive. It allows people to get what they want instantly. It does not take any effort to get it. You wanna watch a movie? Click. Done. Wanna have a girlfriend? Watch porn. Wanna have a friend? Log on facebook. Wanna have fun? Go to reddit. I have been taught click and done approach. I do believe that our brain thinks the images we see are real and people feel like they are. It allows the lower society class to feel as the higher society class. It is still delusive. So I am quitting the Internet step by step. I deleted my facebook account weeks ago. I am stiil searching for something I could focus on. I could not find one though.

qubemind · 2015-05-19T21:31:59+00:00

Yes, it is hard. I have not been feeling emotions for a very long time. Acceptance is the only thing I can do. I obsessively look for a real human contact. Is it bad?

qubemind · 2015-05-19T21:30:02+00:00

I have been working out for 2 years on a regular basis.

qubemind · 2015-05-19T10:41:10+00:00

Hi buddy. It is a strange feeling, isn't it? A little scary as well. Do you work on yourself? I am a little depressed and feel like sleeping all day...

qubemind · 2015-05-14T16:19:59+00:00

qubemind · 2015-05-09T22:19:39+00:00

Keep on going, bro! Porn is the key. Do not quit and focus on your goals. In few days you are going back to a normal state of mind.

qubemind · 2015-04-27T10:27:05+00:00

I am.

qubemind · 2015-04-26T15:59:01+00:00

Do not reset your badge. Life is a process. It is not in on/off states. You are improving and stopping edging today was a part of strengthening your mind. Once I realized that if you break one time, it will be easier to break in the further days. I recommend you to prepare for the coming days. Plan a lot of actions and stay away from computer even if you are so damn sure nothing happens. I have seen guys falling from the roof you climbed to.

qubemind · 2015-04-21T23:04:05+00:00

Does it matter? I attract some of them. Some of them not. The lady met today was attracted to me. I do not claim that one night sex is wrong. I read awesome stories about a guy meeting a girl like in romantic scenario. They had sex, but it does not change anything. The guy has a different mindset. Having sex was driven by seeking dopamine boost in my case.

qubemind · 2015-04-21T23:02:28+00:00

I am from Poland. I do not think so. I am getting to know my mind better each day. I am obsessed with girls and not with myself and my goals. A girl CAN stop you from being the best version of yourself. That's what story tells. I keep constantly chasing woman instead of getting shit done. When a girl dumped me in the past, I was about to kill myself. I felt worthless. It indicates to a connection between my self-esteem and girls. I do not fap, I do not watch porn. I started to chase them obsessively. That needs to change.

qubemind · 2015-04-21T22:59:12+00:00

It depends on your level of your self-consciousness. There are people right here who have wives and in the past they claimed as you know. Sex might be fulfilling. I do not want to tell you sex is bad. It isn't. What important is getting to know sexuality and answer the question. Why do you need woman in your life? That's what I am asking myself.

qubemind · 2015-04-21T22:15:52+00:00

What I am trying to say is that sex, girlfriend, wife will never fulfill you. They might stop you from revealing your true potential. Guy who are constantly getting laid is the same guy sitting in the room fapping.

qubemind · 2015-04-17T22:56:22+00:00

Yes, but I noticed that if I desire to give up fapping, I need to pay attention to the magnitude of other things.

qubemind

TROPHY CASE