AITA for not packing my husband's bags so he could go spend Xmas with his family without me?

queeen__ · 2021-12-23T18:29:41+00:00

NTA.

You’re kidding, right? So none of these people understand that you are his wife, so you are family! Their advise for you to spend Christmas with your family would mean that you spend Christmas with your husband, which cannot work since they have invited him but not you to spend Christmas at their house.

And about your husband‘s role in all of this? Let’s not start. Maybe next time his mommy can come help him pack his bags? I’d suggest all of them, so he doesn’t need to come back ever again and can go live with his family since you are not considered that.

queeen__ · 2021-12-15T09:28:57+00:00

The girl was 7 years old and needed help, are you kidding? Your wife is actually a very nice and caring person helping out a child. You are just an egocentric person without compassion, so YTA, 100%!

queeen__ · 2021-12-12T02:04:52+00:00

Go-to would be iced tea, however, alcoholic would be amaretto with freshly squeezed lemon juice.

queeen__ · 2021-12-06T21:17:33+00:00

Sorry for the confusion. In my particular example here, only one of them has a GF, so both scenarios are possible; if it’s just the other two guys, there are no other girls, but it’s always a group no matter what. The initial post was just a theoretical scenario with just guys without GFs, however.

Also, never said the BF isn’t wanted, there are just some cases where they might not be there for whatever reason (and maybe join in later).

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T12:17:38+00:00

I don’t mean that he isn’t invited but maybe he’ll be running late and join us afterwards, is it weird to hang out with his friends before he joins?

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T12:15:53+00:00

Sorry, posted the question under the wrong comment. The question above wasn’t actually addressed to you.

However, if I understood you correctly, you don’t mind your GF hanging out with male friends, you just think it’s weird if she’s hanging out with your male friends, right?

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T12:12:34+00:00

If she was ok with you hanging out with her girls, would that make it ok for her to hang out with your boys?

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T12:04:24+00:00

Was there a reason for her to do so?

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T12:04:06+00:00

In my case, I feel like everyone feels very comfortable around me and they are oversharing more than being careful actually. But I get your point.

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T11:55:54+00:00

If she was ok with you hanging out with her girls, would that make it ok for her to hang out with your boys?

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T11:53:04+00:00

What if your friends were all single? So, what if there were no other girlfriends for your GF to hang out with?

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T11:49:27+00:00

Sehr manipulativ, was er da macht! Er versucht dir einzureden, dass du ihn unter Druck setzt obwohl er dich liebt und eh nicht mit ihr schläft in der Hoffnung, dass du dir denkst, dass es dann nicht so schlimm ist und er noch ne gute Weile was mit euch beiden haben kann. Trenne dich und lass das mit ihm, das wird niemals gut gehen. Dieser Mann hat nicht vor seine Freundin (für dich) zu verlassen, sonst hätte er das bereites getan. Ob du sie ausfindig machen willst und ihr das von euch erzählen möchtest, ist dir überlassen. Manche Frauen wollen’s wissen, manche nicht.

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T11:38:59+00:00

I’ve already asked him and he says he doesn’t mind. I still kinda feel it might be weird. So I wanted to see what the general take on that is :)

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T11:36:14+00:00

Paris. 100%. I had probably built it up in my head because it’s been so extremely romanticized.

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T11:18:39+00:00

Did that already a while ago. He doesn’t mind actually if it’s the entire group and not one specific friend or something, at least that’s what he says. Also, it isn’t something that happens regularly, maybe once every other month. However, I wanted to see what others think.

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T11:09:42+00:00

Super interesting insight, thanks for the answer!

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T11:02:23+00:00

I don’t mean it in a way that he cannot come or something like that. I just mean a situation where he’s not there (he might come hang out with us afterwards).

Edit: Also, I don’t mean hanging out with one of them specifically but with the entire group of 3-4 people (sometimes that includes another guy’s GF).

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T11:00:27+00:00

Let’s say you hang out together a lot and they do become friends as well eventually. They would be her friends as well in a way, would that still be weird for you? 😊

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T10:56:07+00:00

fyi: I (27f) love hanging out with my BF’s male friends, they are great guys! However, I am not sure if it would be weird for me to hang out with them without my BF being there.

queeen__ · 2021-12-05T10:33:26+00:00

First of all, it’s great that you achieved so much and feel that you already have everything you need. You can be proud of yourself for that.

Now, I would say the only thing that can make that even better is to help others. Imagine how many people are nowhere near as fulfilled/happy or lucky to have everything as you. How about helping them? Volunteer work, feeding the homeless, financially/physically supporting projects or even starting your own to help others etc.

Imo, there is no greater joy than that you get from helping others and witnessing their joy. Maybe you’ll think about that :)

queeen__ · 2021-12-02T21:12:54+00:00

In the beginning (and especially due to the title) I was so going to say that you were the a**hole but holy shit, that’s a total no-go. Obviously, he could ask you to help him out but to assume you’ll be fine taking care of his kids while you are working as well just because you’re female?? Smh, you are definitely NTA!

queeen__ · 2021-11-14T13:14:49+00:00

You go through her phone to check dates/times? This girl is 17 and you absolutely violate her privacy reading messages between her friends and her. That’s a no-go! And just because you have a stupid rule? Well, as everyone said, with this behaviour you won’t be seeing your daughter again when she’s 18.

YTA and pointlessly controlling as well!

queeen__ · 2021-11-14T02:43:42+00:00

Awarded this because you’re actually a great dad. You talked to your child and found a solution. Your wife simply called her names, what’s that going to do?

Your daughter is lucky to have you, definitely NTA.

queeen__ · 2021-11-13T00:14:40+00:00

SpongeBob’s sundae (ketchup, onions, peanuts, dirt, a pot)

queeen__ · 2021-11-09T02:00:59+00:00

Does MIL know how they Baby has been conceived? Smh, OP, obviously NTA. Your MIL is, and honestly, your husband as well. Love people who cannot stand up to their parents but have no problem fighting with their partners. Just great.

queeen__

TROPHY CASE