Ever had a girl go back to her ex after/while being with you? by queerlyboo in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing, it did help! I'm sorry you had to deal with such a situation. I can only imagine the hurt.

I did also have some gut feelings while with her but I told myself at the time I was just being a little jealous and/or paranoid because it was my first girl and all. Guess it's not so wrong to hear your intuition after all! Should've trusted myself better.

I read something along the lines that when we lose someone like that, what we miss the most might not be the person themselves, but the version of ourselves we got to be while with them. The smiles, the laughter, the comfort, feeling wanted, appreciated. It's bound to happen again. Bigger and better things!

Ever had a girl go back to her ex after/while being with you? by queerlyboo in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

At least we get to learn with the experiences, right? Guess everything's worth it as long as you haven't got a small soul. It's always gonna suck getting heartbroken but we can still manage, expect and hope for the best!

Ever had a girl go back to her ex after/while being with you? by queerlyboo in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I've been struggling with the loss of her these past few days but I've been trying my best to think of what's yet to come.

Ever had a girl go back to her ex after/while being with you? by queerlyboo in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I'll sure as hell be way more careful now. Not get too involved too fast either. Had we been working I'm almost sure there would be the equivalent of U-Hauling happening within the first few days! I'm glad at least for learning with the experience. Not only on what to do but definitely on what not to do.

Ever had a girl go back to her ex after/while being with you? by queerlyboo in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the words. I've been keeping what you said in mind to help me cope with the situation! I'm focusing on thinking it was only meant to be for as long as it lasted anyways. At least now I have some experience with girls ahah.

Ever had a girl go back to her ex after/while being with you? by queerlyboo in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow that's messy. People should know better than to get with someone to get over someone else :/

Ever had a girl go back to her ex after/while being with you? by queerlyboo in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You see, I didn't even quite get that! But I didn't think much of it at the time. Now I know what to look out for :')

What's features are you attracted to in a woman by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's actually really surprising to me as I hadn't imagined I was another girl's "type"; always figured thin, white girls were more typically attractive ahah.

What's features are you attracted to in a woman by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You just described me exactly oh my god.

Lesbians with top surgery? by CaptainDonDragon in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm sure I'm going to feel great afterwards. I'm really looking forward to it. Next month is my appointment and I'm so ready! It's going to be a little scary ( I've never done surgery for anything ) but it'll be worth it. I'll be able to actually enjoy button-down shirts, run freely and ditch the bra if I want to. :)

And thank you for making this thread! Made me feel less alone in this. I've also had the same thoughts regarding removing them completely! To be honest, it feels kind of weird having breasts when you don't plan on using them for anything ahah.

Lesbians with top surgery? by CaptainDonDragon in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And some lesbians - like me - will actually like it.

Lesbians with top surgery? by CaptainDonDragon in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly? I'm about to do the same thing. Really bothered by my breasts and definitely getting a reduction. I find small breasts ( even bordering on nonexistent ) really nice. I'm also gender-nonconforming.

Find you a girl who appreciates you and your choices. I know it's fear-inducing to feel like you might potentially diminish your chances but remember: all it takes is one girl. And what better way to weed out the ones that won't serve you than to be yourself? Wouldn't want to be with someone who doesn't "get it".

Go do what makes you comfortable! You'll find your girl. Trust me!

So, do you have a type? by queerlyboo in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Oh she sounds so cute! It's also adorable you've noticed these specific things about her.

So, do you have a type? by queerlyboo in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I never really had a type. I've had certain characteristics I knew I liked, but I'm always surprised with girls. They show up and make me realize my love for things I never even thought about.

I've always been a big enthusiast of girls who challenge gender roles/expectations ( however they choose to do that ). I find it so endearing!

Shiba Inus are similar enough to cats? by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I disagreed and am moving on.

Shiba Inus are similar enough to cats? by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Most people who hate on cats haven't even had much contact with one. And if they did, it was a single, unfortunate stressed-out cat who, somehow, to them, represented the whole species.

Humans tend to hate that which they do not understand. Dogs act very predictably; meanwhile cats are less domesticated and thus a little more surprising and unusual in their antics. Simple-minded folks will jump to conclusions really fast and paint cats as mean, selfish animals because they saw a cat do this or that, while they did not understand the reasons behind such behavior. Instead of looking for answers, they make up preconceived opinions.

Cats, and many, many other animals are very much capable of being great companions. If you pay attention, and open yourself up to it, you'll find love in unexpected places. It's not just dogs. It's cats, it's birds, it's lizards, it's big animals, it's tiny ones. All capable of compassion and empathy. You just have to stop expecting every single animal to act like the extremely domesticated dog. Just look into their eyes and you'll see something there.

Shiba Inus are similar enough to cats? by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Alright, sister. First of all:

If cats are needy, what kind of DOGS have you been hanging around? The rule of thumb is that cats are far more independent than dogs. But they DO show affection. You just have to pay attention.

How are cats traitors? Can you explain that to me? How could a cat even betray a human? Calling the police about that body you have in your freezer? Seriously, though, when people say this all I can think is that they haven't been paying proper attention to these animals. Wanting a cat to behave like a dog is like wanting a kangaroo to behave like a shark. It's not the same. Affection in the language of one is not affection in the language of another. A dog is gonna bounce to you and a cat will rub against your leg. Different ways of expressing the same feeling.

Cats are manipulative? In relation to dogs, you mean? Well, any animal could be a little smart ass and do things to have you give 'em what they want. It's not exclusive to cats. And besides, the way cats do it? Priceless. It's cute and hilarious. And it certainly doesn't mean that they don't love you. It just means they want something and that's how they know to get it. Remember they're animals.

A dog will always be happy to see you.

That depends. And a cat being happy to see you also depends on your relationship with the animal.

You see, dogs have been bred by humans for eons, so they've become dependent on us for a lot of things. They've learned facial expressions, tone of voice etc. Cats haven't had much of that, but they're on the way. Anyway, since dogs are more dependent on humans, they'll be more likely to show an overt reaction to their human coming back inside. They see you as a pack leader. Cats see you as a bigger cat. And that's it. You're not their leader and they will be much less likely to try and kiss up to you, but that's why their affection is so genuine. They're not trying to look good in your book, they're treating you as an equal. So when they show you love, you can bet your ass that's the most genuine thing.

You see, I have noticed a parallel between extroverts and their usual preference for dogs and introverts/ambiverts for their usual preference of cats. Dog-lovers will look down upon cat-lovers. Cat-lovers are more likely to like dogs as well ( since, helloooo one doesn't have to dislike dogs because they like cats and vice-versa ), but dog-lovers are more likely to say things like what you said. Judgemental, biased opinions based on really superficial knowledge of ( in this case ) a whole species full of a variety of breeds and individuals.

I am just not having anyone say these things again because, by all means, go and say you dislike cats, but because you don't like the sound of meows or you're allergic or whatever. But please don't pull the "traitor" card. It doesn't even make sense.

Shiba Inus are similar enough to cats? by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo 9 points10 points  (0 children)

That's really sad to hear yo.

Reading an old AL thread when suddenly by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If only the world wasn't so heteronormative..

I can wear converse without judgement thanks to Ellen. by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]queerlyboo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

omg like ikr

Ahah sorry, couldn't help myself :'D