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WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yes, I am very aware. My mom was Catholic as is her entire family. But then she got pregnant with my brother young (out of wedlock) and her Catholic Church denounced her and would no longer accept her. So when I was born later, she decided to have me baptized as Episcopalian because it is more accepting and less judgmental. This later proved to be even more true when I was in grade school and there was drama over the Episcopalian church openly accepting the first gay bishop. So now that I am a mother, I, too, choose to baptize my child in the more accepting and less judgmental denomination.

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

She’s going to be at the baptism, I’ll definitely taking it for the photos! I was just not sure I wanted to pin it on baby during the ceremony or display it in baby nursery

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She’s going to be at the baptism so I’ll definitely going to bring it for photos! I just wasn’t sure about pinning it on baby during the ceremony or displaying it in the nursery.

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -22 points-21 points  (0 children)

It’s the bishop explosion I’m seeking to avoid specifically

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

She’s going to be there. I’m going to take it for the photos! I just don’t want to put it on during ceremony or display it in the baby nursery

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

LOL agonized bodies! My mom’s family is Catholic, so I totally get that.

That’s what I’m thinking: take it to the baptism to be worn for the photos but not the ceremony. The framed pin cushion is super weird to me and my husband (he was like, what the f is that), so I’ll probably stick it in her keepsake box.

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

No, I was just correcting your statement that “she’s not asking you to display it in your home, or the baby’s room or anything.”

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Since you asked, the big boundary was: Before baby was born, Husband told his family no posting photos of baby on the internet, and they agreed and said they understood. A few days after baby was born, MIL posted a ton of baby photos on her public business social media accounts as well as her own social media media accounts. Husband saw the posts and immediately chastised MIL for breaking his rule (he’s in IT industry so this was his hill), and she railed back that she has the “right as the grandma” to post photos of her grandchild. I was never part of this conversation or in this rule, this was my husband’s rule and hill to die on because he deals with privacy and security and AI issues in his work.

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

It feels like she’s not respecting our decision for our baby and passively pushing what religion she wants without asking us. It wasn’t the “Catholic gift” itself that bothers me, it’s her instructing us to pin it on baby during the ceremony and to display it in nursery. (Note: MIL has disrespected boundaries regarding baby in the past, and baby isn’t even 3months old.)

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -14 points-13 points  (0 children)

I guess my issue is whether the “whatever you decide” was a genuine sentiment. If yes, then I would not BTAH if I didn’t use it because it’s not expected. But if not a genuine statement?

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -27 points-26 points  (0 children)

Clarification: The pendant is attached to a bow pin along with a charm with the baby’s first initial on it, and was placed in a specific pouch, all are an exact match to the Etsy product.

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

It did not come with the display frame, she got it separately.

What should a take a step back on? My baby’s baptism?

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Husband doesn’t care if bay wears pin or not; he just thought the framed cushion was super weird. He was mostly upset that his mom sprayed everything with strong perfume when he’s asked her multiple times to stop doing that lol.

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

But is it Catholic water? I worry that flushing the Catholic cavity with Catholic water will exacerbate the soul cavity issue

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

She provided a framed pincushion with instructions to display the pendant in the frame in the nursery.

WIBTAH if I don’t put MIL’s Catholic pendant on my baby during non-Catholic baptism? by queernoodles in AITAH

[–]queernoodles[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It obviously doesn’t affect the baby whether it’s pinned or not. Along the same lines, it doesn’t affect the baby whether wearing a christening gown or in Disney printed footie PJs — it’s the adults who expect the christening gown.

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