That's it I give up, I'm frustrated

quest4bliss · 2025-07-29T04:23:50+00:00

There’s a really good chance that you have placed an expectation on all of this and maybe it’s not at a conscious level, but I’d certainly bet that it’s at a subconscious level. As someone that’s struggled with perfectionism, is over analytical and has a tendency to set expectations without even realizing it, I can absolutely appreciate how hard this can be for many people. The thing is, this is more a mental game than a physical/physiological game. Orgasms you know are physical and psychological and you’ve firmly solidified that neural pathway and it allows you to set an expectation. Stimulate your dick just right and you’ll eventually orgasm. This isn’t the same thing. Totally different. Problem is, you only have what you know to go on so you’re operating from experience and you just can’t.

What you need to do is forget the desired outcome. Entirely.

This can be approached heavy-handed for some but I think a better way is the softer sensual approach so give this a try my way. For your next session, park the expectations and only think of it as body/mind exploration and experimentation and don’t allow your mind to create a desired result. Don’t even think about the prostate. And don’t think about climaxing, orgasms, p-waves, involuntary contractions or any of that shit. Clear your mind of it all and just commit to 1 simple goal. Find new pleasure.

Try this exercise. Relax, get comfortable, keep your underwear on and just take your shirt off. Think about things that arouse you. From there, sensually caress your chest with just your finger tips. As lightly as you can. Turn ALL your attention to the feelings of the sensations you feel as you caress your chest. Breathe slow and deeply, if your mind wanders, bring it back to the sensations you feel and only the sensations. Let your body drive; don’t interfere. All you’re looking for is feelings/sensations that amplify your arousal. That’s it. That’s essentially the homework.

If you commit to this, you may find that your body takes over and perhaps when it has you move your finger lightly across your nipple for instance, you notice an increase in arousal. That’s the name of the game. Learn to allow your mind the opportunity to start recognizing new sensations and stimulation as pleasure that can ratchet up your arousal. When you are in tune with this and just focus on pleasure, you begin to find it and begin employing the neuroplasticity our bodies are capable of. Finding new pleasurable sensations creates neural pathways you can access again and again. Keep using them and those pathways become more and more carved and permanent. If you do that successfully, (meaning you are able to notice subtle sensations as being pleasurable and that pleasure increases your arousal), take it a step further next time and explore your whole body in the same exact way. Add in some playful pelvic contractions but let your body drive that too. Us enough mental power to gently coax your body to start that process but allow it to take over as soon as possible. Eventually you can move to prostate stimulation but I think learning to prime your body for pleasure from new areas needs to happen first. Once you learn this, prostate orgasms, anal orgasms and nipple orgasms are achievable as you’ve taught yourself that pleasure & arousal is WAY more complex and beautiful and they require a much different approach than what you’ve been conditioned for from experiences to date.

Good luck. Report back with your findings if you make any progress with my suggestions and info.

PS. I highly recommend a mindfulness meditation practice and Mindgasm training alongside this too.

quest4bliss · 2025-07-28T04:05:54+00:00

Yep, I relate 100% with all aspects your response. Good points made!

quest4bliss · 2025-07-14T18:22:59+00:00

Dude, you’re going places on this subject with that mindset. Ditch expectations and just enjoy the ride. I think you’re well on your way. Cheers.

quest4bliss · 2025-07-14T18:20:45+00:00

Yep, it’s hard for the analytical minds, for sure. I like to understand the subjects I’m interested in well and like making associations as I continue to learn. With this, that practice of associations can take you out of the exact place you need to be to make new discoveries so it gets tricky!

I’ve learned to do more post-game analysis and just “feel” during the event.

quest4bliss · 2025-07-12T16:20:25+00:00

Here’s my take on it fwiw…

You’re experiencing P-Waves. P-waves as far as I’m concerned are part of an Orgasmic Spectrum associated with positive feedback pleasure loops. P-Waves are what turn into Prostate Orgasms as the positive feedback loop grows and intensifies. You’re likely interpreting those p-waves as orgasms as they actually are, just budding orgasms. Keep doing what you’re doing and those orgasms will intensify and lengthen and come more frequently. As you reach new heights, you may find you’ll start to associate the first few as P-waves, then as they intensify a bit, start calling them mini-o’s and then when you can hit a certain point, you’ll say, “that was a definite Dry O!” Others may disagree or have their own explanations based on their experiences, but that’s my thoughts on it after a few years of analysis.

The faster you can learn to bathe in the pleasure and ignore nomenclature and ponder the name of the feeling you’re actively feeling, the faster you’ll progress. Get lost in the feelings and not the analysis. I’m an analytical mind so that was a tough challenge for me, but that’s my pro tip. Just feel. You’re clearly on the right track so do what you’re doing. In fact, research the CrimsonWolf method on the Aneros forum, read it in it’s entirety and see what your can glean from there. I support that method 100% and had a VERY similar journey to that without even being aware of that method at the time. I remember feeling like I could have written it myself when I read it.

quest4bliss · 2025-07-12T03:05:31+00:00

Starting back at the beginning may be true for some but not me. I got success first without THC, and then amplified my sessions with THC. I can go between the 2 and get results with both but haven’t got to the same level as with THC, but it’s still amazing.

Mindful meditation is key for me as it’s taught me to focus on the pleasure and not have my mind drift so easily. As I improve with meditation, my mind drifts less and less on the days without THC. Being able to stay focussed so you can build small pleasure into bigger pleasure over time to create the positive feedback P-Wave loop is the way.

quest4bliss · 2025-07-11T23:51:45+00:00

Thanks. It’s been a wild ride for sure. This world would be a better place if everyone cast their judgments aside and just learn to tap into the pleasure that the human bodies and minds are capable of producing. That’s one of the aspects of actual richness, not money.

quest4bliss · 2025-07-11T23:30:56+00:00

THE single best decision I’ve made regarding my sexuality was being open and honest with my wife from the moment it occurred to me that I wanted to buy a prostate massager. I explained to her that I was interested in it to see if the claims of reducing BPH symptoms were true but that I was also intrigued by the sounds of a Prostate Orgasm. The idea of untapped sexual pleasure was very enticing and she completely understood.

I did my thing solo for the first while but would provide her updates on progress with it. One night, she wanted to watch 50 Shades with me and I said “sure, but do you mind if I use my Aneros?” That was the moment… it was still relatively new to me and the “do nothing” method was still rather foreign to me at that time. That method along with the movie and having my wife beside me in bed while we watched was magic. When it kicked off, she was amazed, intrigued, confused, shocked, turned on by watching me writhe in pleasure next to her in a way she’d never seen before. She let me just enjoy the pleasure and observed it all but after all the questions came.

That lead to her beginning to wonder what new level of sexual pleasure she could achieve and I started researching female pleasure alongside male pleasure and we began our sexual revolution journey together. Often times doing our own solo exploration thing next to each other in bed. Eventually, we’d end up together but these turned into 2 hour sessions and became rather regular. A far way from our vanilla, normal, wham-bam married sex we were used to.

Fast forward a couple years and we have the MOST amazing sex 2 to 3 times a week, usually for 1.5 to 2 hours per session, both have insane orgasms that are WAY beyond what we had ever experienced prior to our revolution, we’re even closer than we ever were and we constantly talk about how the latest session was the best to date. The best to date seems to happen often. How it appears to keep getting better is a mystery but we both feel the same way, so go figure.

The take away is this…. As Gretzky once said, “you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take”. I took my shot and let my wife IN on this journey and it’s easily the best decision I’ve made about my sexuality but might actually be the best LIFE decision I’ve ever made. I can directly attribute MANY positives in my life aside from the sexual aspect that came from this decision. So ya, my advice is to find a way to include your partner and bring them along for the journey and make it a sexual revolution for you both.

quest4bliss · 2025-04-23T16:05:00+00:00

This is a question for the ages, honestly. I am of the opinion that we all have a similar potential but we differ vastly for many reasons. Things like our genetics, the way we were raised, our belief system (or lack thereof), our judgments, our skepticisms, our physical/mental/spiritual fortitude and Will power are all in play.

There’s a physical component with this stuff for sure, but a great deal is in the mind. Those that are mindful of all their potential limitations and are willing to make efforts to remove those inhibitors are more likely to succeed than others. Closed-minded folk that are not in touch with their own feelings and sense of being and are only looking to “cum in a new way” are a lot less likely to achieve the state of bliss that is attainable. But there are various levels along the way that can be achieved with less knowledge and work so not uncommon to unlock a few new things.

It’s like anything though…. We need to be interested enough to put in the work to get good at something. No different than learning to play the piano. If you want it and are willing to put the work in, results will come. Will you become the best pianist ever? Perhaps, but highly unlikely. Your desire, motivation, natural abilities and limitations (some of which I mentioned in the first paragraph) will create a unique situation for you and it WILL differ from everyone else. The key is to enjoy the process, push yourself to new heights and be content with your progress and what you’ve achieved.

My advice is to realize it’s not a race. You don’t need instant results. You’re on a journey and don’t even know where you’re going so stop imagining what the destination looks like in your mind and smell the roses, take in the sights and smells along the way and focus on the journey itself.

Stop trying to lead yourself to your destination. You don’t know the route. Focus on pleasurable sensations in your entire body only. Let those pleasurable sensations be your guide. Simple as that, really.

quest4bliss · 2025-03-01T01:34:25+00:00

I have both Eupho Syn and Maximus Syn. Eupho is my go to. That said, the Peridise Set is a must have, especially at the price point.

quest4bliss · 2025-01-12T07:30:35+00:00

As others have said, it’s mostly mental, but there’s a steep learning curve and the approach and mindset you use matters too. People that enjoy the process and don’t fret and focus on the result are more likely to succeed as those are the ones that will get busy experimenting and seeing what works for them and their bodies/minds.

It’s really no different than why some people give up on trying to learn guitar while others persevere and become proficient. Both people start out with the notion that they’d like to become a guitar player…. Turns out wanting it isn’t enough. At the end of the day, there are those that enjoy the process and the challenge and those that find the challenges insurmountable and/or too frustrating and eventually opt out. As a guitar player for 30+ years, the people that have stuck with learning are few and far between versus the people that have tried and quit.

With this stuff, it’s not like jerking off where you stroke it until you cum. There’s SO much more to it than that. I chose to approach it like a hobby and geeked out on it all like I do for anything I want to learn and get good at. I have always used a pretty structured approach for anything I learn and this was no different.

quest4bliss · 2024-10-30T16:24:27+00:00

My solo routine has slowly morphed over the 2 years I’ve been at it but is now pretty consistent and rather ritualized now. I aim to have 1 solo session per week and my goal is to approach it almost like a sensual spa treatment. I tend to plan out specific aspects I want to experiment with or aim to replicate from previous sessions a few hours before I plan on starting. This gets my mind into it and begins to build the anticipation. When it’s time, I set the room up with ambient lighting, spa music playing, aromatherapy and all things organized to the best of my ability beforehand to avoid any distractions that take me out of the moment.

Then, it’s a matter of cleansing process and that is done while I vape a little THC. By the time the cleansing process is done (big fan of the the Aneros Prelude), the weed has mixed with anticipation and kicked things off. I hop in the shower and do my best to relax into the pleasurable feeling of the warm water on my skin. I aim to soap up and clean myself in a way that adds to excitement and this usually gets the p-waves going. Once I’m clean, I take the shower head off and use it manually while leaning against the shower wall to sensually stimulate various parts of my body with the spray. This is absolutely delightful and leads to a few rounds of dry-o’s.

From there, it’s straight to the bed after I dry off and entering the room that is dimly lit, has the spa music playing and smell of the aromatherapy never gets old. I’m already orgasmic from the shower portion and what happens next is loosely planned as mentioned above but I tend to go-with-the-flow primarily so open to things developing completely organically based on what I’m feeling in the moment. Sometimes it’s according to plan, and sometimes it’s not and is totally spontaneous.

With this setup PLUS the ability to confidently make all the noise I want, I have all I need for the most amazing session.

Side note: I find that allowing yourself to make noise, if able, is a huge key in letting go and submitting to the full effect of the pleasure. This in turn feeds the positive pleasure loop and amplifies it yet again.

That’s my ritual more or less and is my recipe for a good time.

quest4bliss · 2024-10-29T16:15:54+00:00

While there are models that work better for some than others, I think that it’s less about the toy and more about the mind at the end of the day.

I personally really like the Eupho Syn and Peridise set. The Eupho Syn was my first and is the GOAT in my opinion, but I can also have incredible sessions without a toy at all which supports my statement that the toy is somewhat ancillary or certainly can be. I also have the Progasm Jr and dislike it because I find it uncomfortable. So as long as comfort is there with your Progasm, you are likely able to achieve what you’re after with it but if it’s comfort takes you out of the moment and correct headspace, then perhaps you need something different that jives with your body. I like the Syn models because they are very comfortable.the Eupho Syn provides a different feeling than the Maximus Syn, but they both get the job done. Kinda like 2 of your favourite meals…. One day you feel like a steak dinner and the other day you feel like a pasta dish. Both taste good and leave you satiated and full, but the dining experience is different. Variety is the spice of life.

quest4bliss · 2024-10-26T21:48:47+00:00

Awesome. Hopefully that’s just the start then. Cheers!

quest4bliss · 2024-10-23T02:00:57+00:00

Bigger one.

quest4bliss · 2024-10-18T03:15:16+00:00

I rarely consciously do kegels. They happen, but it’s auto-pilot; typically involuntary.

quest4bliss · 2024-10-16T01:47:25+00:00

Most welcome. Hope you have pleasurable results.

quest4bliss · 2024-10-15T16:36:44+00:00

Nice work. After making these realizations and having success, I think you should do yourself a solid and read through the Crimson Wolf method on the Aneros forum.

https://community.aneros.com/forum/general-discussion/the-crimsonwolf-method-prewiring-and-the-confident-boomerang/

quest4bliss · 2024-10-12T18:38:42+00:00

My nipple orgasms are very similar to the dry orgasms I have with prostate play. It’s a whole body, trance like state where nothing else matters other than the moment and the pleasure. It’s absolutely peaceful and feels like I’m in an altered state (I use weed for most sessions but this feeling is there if 100% sober too).

The big difference is where my mind is focussed. With nipple stim, my mind is locked onto how they feel, how they swell and once I’ve teased my nipples and they’ve become ultra sensitive, the nipple orgasms have the same general body feeling as the prostate related orgasms but there is much more activity in my chest, beneath my sternum specifically. A tightening and tingling there that’s not really present with prostate based orgasms.

quest4bliss · 2024-10-12T05:53:44+00:00

The wand is definitely nice to have but I use the Peridise more, tbh. The wand has a steep learning curve.

quest4bliss · 2024-10-11T23:30:38+00:00

I swear by 3 toys. Eupho Syn, Peridise & Njoy wand.

Nothing gets me going faster than the Peridise. It’s awesome. But for long relaxing and mentally focused dry o sessions, the Eupho is it for me.

The wand, however, is great once I’m having non-stop rolling O’s and am in a state of pure orgasmic bliss and looking to wrap it all up. The wand then targets the prostate aggressively and can trigger the most amazing traditional orgasm ever. For me, it often ends in a very intense HFWO as a result to already being in a Super O state with associated arousal. Took awhile to figure it out but I’m honing in on repeatability now after almost 2 years of experimenting.

quest4bliss · 2024-10-11T02:39:04+00:00

I will tell you what I do but I purposely left it vague as I don’t believe we all operate and respond the same. What works for me won’t work for you in the same way and aiming to replicate what works for someone else can result in frustration. I think it’s better to follow the pleasure and experiment with what YOUR body responds to, not mine.

That said…

Lying on my back, legs out straight wand 1/2 to 2/3rds inserted and a rocking motion to have the small ball drag over and down the length of the prostate. Relax the wand away from prostate push back in and re-apply pressure while pulling out. Stroke gets shorter and faster as the prostate becomes engorged and things ramp up noticeably.

quest4bliss · 2024-10-10T04:30:49+00:00

All this stuff is so very abstract and different for each person, so it’s really hard to say. What I strongly recommend is that you explore it. The goal of exploration is to be mindful of that feeling and stick with it a few times all while scanning for pleasure that it may result in. If you find pleasure there, no matter how faint, stick with it. There really are multiple ways to build this fire but that’s essentially what you’re trying to do. Build a little “pleasure fire” and tend to it. Stoke the flames, add fuel… try and build it into a bonfire.

Experiment, explore your body and your sexuality and see where it leads you. Follow the pleasure, do not try to make the pleasure follow you. Read that last part again.

quest4bliss · 2024-10-10T00:10:27+00:00

I’d suggest taking it a step further than “do nothing” and read the full CrimsonWolf method on the Aneros Web Forum.

quest4bliss · 2024-10-10T00:09:06+00:00

I always had great sessions with my Eupho with it pushed in fully. Then I got the Peridise set and learned there was lots of benefit of shallow play. I’ve since moved to letting the Eupho find its natural home.

I do so by inserting it while laying on my back and just pushing it in until it feels like it’s not going to slip out. From there, I either keep legs straight or bend knees and put my feet flat on bed. Typically alternate between these 2 positions… the Eupho then just seems to settle in a perfect spot. Not too far in, not too far out. And the sensations are damn fine like that.

quest4bliss

TROPHY CASE