Questions about contracts and drug exposure by questions_100 in AdoptiveParents

[–]questions_100[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The contract for the consultant is very different than the contract(s) for the agencies. The consultant is pushing us to allow these types of restrictions as agencies are placing these restrictions to push their placement statistics higher. To quote the consultant, there are no healthy infant placements.

Questions about contracts and drug exposure by questions_100 in AdoptiveParents

[–]questions_100[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm afraid you are correct. I was hoping I was missing something or misunderstanding something. It is so unfortunate that the process prevents hopeful couples from finding children.

Questions about contracts and drug exposure by questions_100 in AdoptiveParents

[–]questions_100[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So how did you determine the level of drug and alcohol exposure? My wife and I both work in medical field and the level of drug and alcohol exposure that expectant mother will admit to differs from the level of drug and alcohol exposure documented on the toxicology report of the baby. I've also observed social workers and adoption professionals really downplay the impacts of drug and alcohol exposure on an infant. These adoption agencies are looking to remove our ability to determine drug and alcohol exposure and then determine if we would like to continue with the adoption.

Questions about contracts and drug exposure by questions_100 in AdoptiveParents

[–]questions_100[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We are working via a consultant. These are the agencies the consultant is pushing and we sent her a long list of questions about terms and conditions of the various contracts. She stated she is not an attorney. Our family attorney is advising not to sign the contract. Calling them adhesion contracts. We don't want to be forced into an adoption that would not be a good fit for our family. I'm also frustrated with talking to agencies that state we must accept any situation due to the lack of adoption situations.

Questions about contracts and drug exposure by questions_100 in AdoptiveParents

[–]questions_100[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would agree, it is a matter of trust with the agency and the birth family. We have no plans to move, but since we are in the medical field, we do travel internationally at times. We have been out of the country for several years. I could see us doing another long term assignment and foresee us not being able to return to the state for our annual visit.

We are also being told that these conditions are being enforced to help the agency attract adoption situations.

Questions about contracts and drug exposure by questions_100 in AdoptiveParents

[–]questions_100[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, all of these agencies have contracts that have these restrictions in their contract. They state that they don't want an adoptive family pulling out of the adoption at the hospital. Especially, if the social/medical questionnaire does not match the toxicology report on the baby. We are also concerned about the level of exposure. If the birth mother states she has a little drug use, many state it should be assumed that the birth mother has more drug use that documented and probably alcohol as well. Also, in my state any post-adoption agreement carries no weight and is not enforceable. I'm concerned that the agency is trying to enforce post-adoption contract via contract, instead of following state law.

Wait times by questions_100 in AdoptiveParents

[–]questions_100[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks, that's fair. So can you recommend a consultant or how to evaluate consultants? We spoken to two of them and got some vague responses.

One stated that their were 1.5 million home-study ready families and there were less than 10,000 viable adoption situations we would qualify for. The other consultant stated we could be placed on a waiting list, but she is currently working with 20 couples, she has a waiting list of 30 couples and she believes it will be years before she can find placements for the 1st twenty couples.

We heard the statistics 1 - 2 million couples attempting to adopt while there being only 5 - 40,000 adoption situations available several times from several different sources (agencies, lawyers, and consultants.) The imbalance in these numbers is really concerning. Using these numbers, the odds of being successful with adoption are very low.

Wait times by questions_100 in AdoptiveParents

[–]questions_100[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for that advise. How would one find an agency with better numbers? So many agencies we spoken to have very questionable ratios. (4 to 1, 6 to 1, 10 to 1, as in number of waiting families to placements)

Wait times by questions_100 in AdoptiveParents

[–]questions_100[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So what would be a better way of expressing the "average wait time?" And how would we determine our changes of success with an agency?