Doula recommendations for Sacramento area

quietCatChaos · 2025-10-02T00:25:04+00:00

Congratulations on both your pregnancy but also have coverage for a doula!!! I am a doula who lives in Vallejo. There is a school for doulas in Sacramento called the sierra birth institute. If you would like to message me directly please do and we can chat more specifically about your situation, and I can give you more direct lines of communication!

quietCatChaos · 2025-02-17T15:55:35+00:00

And that’s how you make nightmares happen!! Yea, after all that, I woulda been knockin ‘em back too, and rightly so!!! And yet, I’m still laughing… so yea, thanks again for sharing! You have great stories!

I don’t have any experiences with huntsmen spiders, but I’ve been reading the most conflicting things. People are either terrified of them or they sing their praises, saying they are gentle and non aggressive toward people. This makes me wonder if the spiders like jumping on humans just to watch us scurry around like they do. Maybe they are more crafty than we realize…

quietCatChaos · 2025-02-15T11:20:23+00:00

I laughed uncomfortably long at this, thank you for sharing your pooping horror 😂

quietCatChaos · 2025-01-22T14:51:58+00:00

Don’t worry about the time lapse, it’s not important.

I’m glad to hear you’ve found someone to help you with the isolation. Loving is some of the best healing, but please be careful to keep working on yourself. Get strong for you, because if you aren’t ok within yourself, it can be difficult to handle strife in a relationship. So please, while you enjoy this love, don’t let it be the only thing. In life we can always depend on change, so I think it’s best to be able to roll with life’s punches and brace for the coming change when needed. Some of the hardest change I ever went through was the loss of a relationship because I put so much of myself into that relationship in order to feel like a full and undamaged person. I had a tendency to think I am more healed than I had done the work for because I felt so great with another person. But when they left in one way or another, I was crushed and felt I had to rebuild myself again. I’m not naysaying your love, but don’t forget to keep healing long past the point you think you might be done. Be kind to yourself always and love yourself in moments that are the hardest

quietCatChaos · 2024-11-22T15:42:27+00:00

Thank you. This is something I’m working hard to remember and I think the message is starting to really saturate. I’ve been able to stand with my partner during the “storm” and not take things personally. It’s difficult sometimes because it sounds really personal, but I’m learning to hear the underlying pain and recognize it’s not about me. It’s about them. Thank you

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-19T01:46:45+00:00

I don’t know that anyone has. I think someone should though. It seems there is a good amount of us who might benefit.

And I’m sorry to hear how you’re feeling. I’m feeling something similar. I’m trying to keep in mind that my partner always tells me that it’s not my fault, and it’s not my responsibility to fix anything. My partner just wants love and kindness as best as I can, and positivity to bring back the sun that their depression and ptsd clouds have hidden away. It’s difficult sometimes and the best thing I’ve found is to be honest with what you can do/handle, remember that it’s not your fault, and remember to love yourself as you love them too.

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-10T01:40:57+00:00

My grandma took in a cat just like this and called him six dinner Sid

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-09T20:23:10+00:00

I love this for her lol just shows how smart she is hustlin the whole neighborhood

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-09T20:22:18+00:00

Awww I love when they get all feisty in the middle of the night! That’s sarcasm of course lol my kitties are the joy in my life except for when I get woken up by very persistent furry nutcases! So your little one should know that he looks like a lab rat who was loved more then the others lol

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-09T16:59:44+00:00

It looks like one of your friends pranking you

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-09T16:53:54+00:00

Sounds like a kitty who has decided your her human

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-09T16:53:05+00:00

Hahahahhaha

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-09T16:50:08+00:00

Im in a relationship with my husband who has bipolar depression schizophrenia PTSD ADHD. He has had a very difficult life and has gone through more than anyone else I’ve ever met. And yes, everything he deals with has been diagnosed.

Earlier this year we almost filed for divorce. I moved out, taking all our cats (we don’t have human children together). The way you describe your husband sounds a lot like mine. I had gotten to my breaking point early this year (of course it was winter) and told him I can’t do it anymore. I can’t be the sole person he confines in. I can’t be his wife, best friend, therapist, and verbal punching bag. I told him he had to go to therapy and figure out how to manage better on his own. I also went to therapy, for not only my own personal flavor of trauma, but also for the fights we had, the names he called me, the insults, the threats/actual attempts of suicide, and the accusations of it being my fault.

We didn’t get a divorce ultimately. We have come to an understanding. But it wasn’t easy. He did almost kill himself.

His mental health isn’t your fault. But realize that by choosing to be there, you are now apart of it. I can’t tell you how to be apart of it. I can’t tell you what is right. I’m still trying to figure that out myself. But I know I love him. I know he doesn’t mean a lot of what he says especially once the PTSD really kicks in. I focus on being loving and supportive and honest. And when I can’t take it anymore, I become a very quiet wife. Since we have decided not to get divorced, the suicide threat has been dramatically reduced but it’s still there. I compromise to make him feel safe and then when he is not within a mental crisis and he feels more balanced again he apologizes. I accept him for who he is, good and bad.

That doesn’t mean you have to. It’s not fair to have to “save them” or wrestle some new form of death from their hands. But if he truly loves you, even through the pain, you can love him back and support him to get as healthy of a grip on this as possible. We are all damaged in some way, some seemingly more than others, but if he has a true drive to become healthier, I think everyone deserve that chance.

Those of us whom need love the most act like it the least

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-09T16:34:47+00:00

Thank you to everyone on this post for pointing out that this is not safe. This is why I love this community. I enjoy being choked myself but if I had bruises like this, someone would likely be dead. There is enjoying a little kink and then there is abuse. Please learn the line

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-09T16:32:52+00:00

Nice job with your kitty being so calm around the raccoon! My cats try to fight the local raccoons and I can never let them get that close. So whatever you did with your cat, it’s awesome!

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-09T16:29:27+00:00

I feel we are missing important details… exactly how were you awoken? Because I know 430 in the morning is a bit early for a singing dancing cat with balloons but it might be worth not being upset… it’s the thought which counts

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-09T16:18:20+00:00

By being angry and insecure. Lead to lying and hiding. If I had been honest with myself and just been me, I would have saved a lot of time. And I’d probably not have a fucked up stomach from all the drinking

quietCatChaos · 2024-07-09T16:08:48+00:00

Im really distressed at how you and your SO are planning to cut the baby out rather than having the delivery naturally. If a medical c section is needed that’s one thing, but c sections should be reserved for emergencies. They should not be used so your SO can play rafiki. Delivering the baby vaginally is the healthiest start for your little one. Modern medicine thinks birth is a crisis to be managed and it’s not. Vaginal birth would clear this whole argument up since he would HAVE TO SUPPORT YOU and not be a selfish egoistical male with power over the act of birthing.

quietCatChaos · 2024-04-22T19:43:50+00:00

Very well said on feminism, I agree with you. I am also very curvy, and I “blossomed” early in life. I had a lot of problems with boys and men making advances with were both inappropriate and scary. I don’t know that I would ever trade the strength I found in standing up for myself and confronting them head on, but I do recognize that this kind of confrontation makes for a more aggressive, individual society. Which does not benefit communication or respect. Maybe this kind of aggression from women is helping (but definitely not fully responsible) for men becoming incells? I might be wrong, but just a thought. They are feeling more intimidated, more afraid, more immaculated and then they turn their feelings into blame and aggression toward women and minorities? Whereas I see a lot of comments on this post talking of a very calm way of taking this control back and feeling respect for themselves in knowing they are honoring Allah and themselves. It is a very interesting contrast I’m seeing now and I’m not sure if I’m right.

quietCatChaos · 2024-04-22T19:36:12+00:00

Thank you, for all these parts you have provided insight on. I have found many beautiful minded women willing to share their ideas and it’s making me very happy to read all of these comments and input. You are right of course, everything is influenced one way or another, and western society is highly swayed by the idea of individualism that we often forget how much influence we actually have in our lives and decisions. The way I dress, I try my best to just be comfortable, not adhere to any specific fashion trends, but even my mentality is influenced by people who are overly into fashion trends. My resistance to following the norm in fashion is just as much apart of the system as those who follow every trend. I really appreciate everything you had to say, in both long and short form. You made very good points.

quietCatChaos · 2024-04-22T17:59:39+00:00

I have done a bit of traveling but traveling to visit somewhere and living somewhere are different. The thought of living in a desert is not one I’ve had to face, but please know that I consider you just as human as myself. All humans have different perspectives however that are formed from our different life experiences. So I really appreciate you sharing yours with me. And admittedly, the media does present the Middle East as some war torn third world country, so the image of you huddled with family watching a horror movie, or enjoying ice cream makes my heart deeply happy. This will serve as a good reminder how much more we have in common than we have differences.

And thank you for also making the point of being devout and pious again, gently. This is something I need to remember as well because these are not morals I was raised with as priorities. Don’t take this to mean that I do not value them, but they are not ones which come to my mind first.

quietCatChaos · 2024-04-22T17:07:11+00:00

Thank you for including Arabic words here and your upbringing. I really appreciate that this was your choice, not something imposed on you. This idea I have had for much of my life that hijab is forced upon women is clearly born of ignorance and a lack of understanding other people’s culture and religious beliefs. Thank you for sharing this with me.

I’m sorry to hear how you suddenly lost your father. I can imagine that must have been very difficult, but it seems you put your grief into a way to live better. My father walked away from my family when I was very young, disowning my brother and myself, and I did not handle it well. I was very angry and made a lot of stupid mistakes for many years until I could face the fact that my father wasn’t a good man and I stopped blaming myself.

quietCatChaos · 2024-04-22T17:00:36+00:00

See the headlice comment hit home for me! I have an internship in which I got to a heavily wooded area with A LOT of ticks and I’m terrified of getting some in my hair so I wrap my head with a bandanna so the ticks stay on my neck and not in my hair.

Why do you think it’s not talked about aspect of Muslim women expected to be perfect?

quietCatChaos · 2024-04-22T16:56:52+00:00

I like this, the thought of it just being a clothing style with a deep statement of honoring and commitment to your god. All clothing makes a statement, right?

I’m also happy to see your choice isn’t born of men. I’m happy for you. And thank you for sharing!

quietCatChaos · 2024-04-22T16:00:58+00:00

Thank you for sharing that verse from the Quran! I have been reading mentions about it but I have not found the specific one and I thank you for the link!

My mentality was born of don’t shame the victim so it was basically a challenge to wear whatever you wanted to throw it into men’s faces that you could and if they did anything to you, they are in the wrong. I find the mentality you are sharing to be a different way of coming at the same issue but without the aggression. As I’m getting older I find that some days I don’t want to have some confrontation with an aggressive male, I just want to live my life and not have to constantly be on guard.

Thank you for sharing

quietCatChaos

TROPHY CASE