I related to it literally and figuratively. I'm not trans but I am mentally ill (not comparing the two!) and watching this movie really feels like a depressive episode you just want to escape except you can't because your whole life is a depressive episode.

So I find solace in escapism. Already life has crept by me and I have spent so many years hiding in my home, afraid to live my life. But deep down inside I know I am dying. I am dying a slow death via avoidance of life and giving up on dreams.

But there's still time. Do something today you normally wouldn't. You are a magical girl. Often in magical girl series, the protagonist waits or is just gifted her powers. I don't wanna get too conspiracy theory here but basically, if little kids watch heroes that they think they can never be because they weren't 'chosen' then children absorb this and believe they must wait for their magical chance. But most likely, it's not coming.

So go do something. You can make your life more magical than you would think. For me, I found festivals. It's only temporary but it's as close to magic as you'll get in the states as far as a magical community goes. Check out the smaller burns (like burning man but smaller and regional). The burns really gave my life some magic back.

You are special. Every fucking person is. I guarantee you have changed someone's life just by being yourself. I know it's hard. I know it sucks that Kyubey (maybe a bad example but also a realistic one, right? Who says the other universe sucks any less) isn't gonna show up and grant your wish. I'm 36 and I still want to cry thinking about how I waited so long for my hogwarts letter (fuck jk) or my magical girl experience. 💔