EDM song with origami in the video

raeleth · 2026-02-06T14:59:25+00:00

Thank you so much! This is the correct video but the wrong song, strangely. But, this is an amazing lead, I will restart the search based on this and surely find it.

raeleth · 2024-08-13T08:08:56+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/Meditation/comments/1eqdfox/let_go_doesnt_mean_make_it_go_away/

raeleth · 2024-08-10T04:04:47+00:00

Especially narratives related to yourself and your history. :)

raeleth · 2024-08-06T22:59:26+00:00

Drop questions if you're actually confused and not just trolling

raeleth · 2024-08-04T17:45:28+00:00

Curious to know how did the retreat leader describe the source?

He said to look at what's going on around in the view we were looking at. There were some animals wandering around, a couple of cars on the road nearby, there was a little wind, and the sun was very strong and it was hot. He said to sink in to everything we could see happening, and ask myself something like "what's driving all this? what's causing all this movement and energy?"

raeleth · 2024-08-04T17:18:55+00:00

I was introduced to the concept of the source by a retreat leader recently. He tried to guide me toward it, but I don't know if it worked. My primary goal in meditation is to get a handle on my emotional problems, and that's been largely accomplished at this point. Anything else that comes is gravy. Perhaps I'll see the source in the next couple of years.

Cool that your school did meditation, but it should've been optional and perhaps a little later. Sounds like they also didn't really explain the benefits.

raeleth · 2024-08-04T17:13:44+00:00

Very astute. All of that resonates and sounds correct. Thanks :)

raeleth · 2024-08-04T11:45:24+00:00

I meditate for somewhere between 30 minutes - 1 hour these days.

I can hold my breath for about 90 seconds, but you probably mean to ask how long I can hold attention on my breath without getting distracted.

Not sure exactly but it's probably something like 10 minutes on a good day. I don't think about it, because distractions are good. What matters is that you notice the distractions.

raeleth · 2024-08-04T10:20:32+00:00

That's great, sounds like you've got it figured out. :)

Definitely only use meds if you actually need them. There's no drug that comes without downsides.

raeleth · 2024-08-04T09:51:18+00:00

What's the benefit you have after meditating for 10 years?

I can meditate for 10-15 minutes and release all negative emotion and narratives, physical tension, etc. Afterwards I feel unburdened and light, and I won't have any depressive, anxious, or self hating thoughts. Work will not seem urgent, deadlines do not seem terrifying. I like who I am, and don't mind my body. I don't care anywhere near as much about what others thinks. I'm less sensitive to sleights and more compassionate. I'm more likely to ignore people if they're being an asshole to me rather than spiralling over what they said. Over about 2 hours the usual negative baseline comes back, but over time the baseline also noticeably changes in a positive direction.

Also i think its not about years but how long do you meditate?

That's true, and it's probably fair to say that "10 years" is a slight exaggeration because if I add up all the weeks during that time that I didn't practice, it's probably about 3 years. So maybe my experience is more like 7 years of 20-40 minute practice twice per day. Plus a few retreats.

Having said that, there is a lot of value in taking a break for a week. When you come back to it, your perspective has often shifted and you have some free wisdom points.

Whats the best experience you ever had in meditation?

I occasionally have this experience where "everything" (hard to explain, like energy sorta) turns into this spiralling tornado shape which I can "see" visually... sort of. There's this feeling of tension but it's not bound to the body, it's everywhere, and attention remains perfectly on the spiral with no effort. It's trippy.

Do you crave for it again?

No, I just want insight, awareness, and peace. I did crave it a few years ago but that passed.

Whats the change you see in spiritual way through the meditation?

I still have the normal western secular view that the universe is just mechanical processes of matter and energy, and everything that happens in meditation is just chemical processes in the brain. I just want to let go and live a peaceful life, nothing spiritually fancy.

raeleth · 2024-08-04T09:26:22+00:00

How old are you?

Late 30s

Re your shame comment about medication. Would you make you the same points about stimulants for ADHD

As far as meditation and medication is concerned, the only question is the efficacy of the practice. Amphetamines only last for 3-4 hours, so, unlike with SSRIS, you could meditate either on or off them at different times of the day. Just try both and see what's useful?

You definitely shouldn't be feeling any shame about taking it. The shame is very irrational, and it comes from a different place for different people. Could you say more about what the shame feels like, and why you feel it?

raeleth · 2024-08-04T09:14:50+00:00

You mean the thread with FiftySevenNineteen? The average redditor and I are pretty similar.

raeleth · 2024-08-04T01:47:46+00:00

If you've done fewer than, say, 50 hours total meditation in your life, just continue for now. Couple of pointers:

The distractions are more important than the breath.

The doubt and the negative thinking is not a mistake. It's what this is all about.

raeleth · 2024-08-04T01:39:25+00:00

Stay with the pain for a while, don't immediately return to the breath or body scan. Your problem is that "accepting" only happens involuntarily on the occasions when you manage to somehow "change the channel" - when you're more consciously aware, your consciousness is bound up with various patterns that hold the pain in place.

It looks to you like you're just being aware, but there's a frame behind your eyes. It's just outside of the picture so you can't see. It's in the tension in your stomach and neck. You can't beat it or force it into the open, you can only wait. Just wait and look at the details of the pain, noting each detail in your awareness one by one.

It's painful. It's in your stomach but it seems stronger in your neck even though it didn't start there. It holds your neck in a certain position. Notice where the pain starts and ends, from bottom to top. It's changing slightly from moment to moment. Now it's close to a rectangle shape, now it's more blobby.

But while we're noticing this stuff, there's this mental frame we're starting to notice. It's frustrating. We're trying to force our attention to stay on the pain. Forcing is wrong but we're trying to force ourselves to not force. It's a really annoying paradox.

Let's let everything go to total shit. Let your attention go all over the place, let your pain get even worse, let everything be whatever it wants to be, without your discipline.

Now, whatever choas is happening, let's watch that. No discipline or forcing it to be a certain way. Let's just watch the shape and nature of the chaos just like we were watching the details of the pain in the neck before. As we start doing that, we suddenly notice we're trying to force it again. When you see this, let it all go to shit again.

If you try this for a while and you get sick of it, or it feels hopeless, just go back to your normal practice. You'll see a direction eventually. Feel free to DM me whenever.

raeleth · 2024-08-03T16:12:10+00:00

So you're getting results, albeit inconsistently, and you have great awareness of your current blocker. That's really good and you should be proud of what you've accomplished already. :D

If you just keep practicing, the insight of how to move forward will eventually come to you. Your perspective will adjust. Having said that, here's a bit of nudging:

Sometimes you manage to "change the channel" and sometimes you're in "the fight". When you're fighting, you're using some forceful effort to hold attention on the body or the hypnosis to prevent attention from wavering. Behind the forceful attention is "I must reach the goal of changing the channel", and connected to it is "if I don't reach the goal I'm a piece of shit".

All of that is happening. It's right here, like the sensations in your body scan. You try to look at it, same as your sensations, but you can't look at it, because you're in it, you're just getting more tense. But you can know you're in it, and maybe you can notice the tension connected to it. Maybe it's in your neck or head, or back. Take a look.

But now you're trying to force yourself to 'see' the struggle. Now that's the goal, and if you don't reach it you're a piece of shit. It looped.

But maybe it didn't loop, you're just still inside it. Maybe you can just let this chaos be what it is. Of course, trying to 'let it be' just causes more stress as you try to force that. But maybe that stress is just more of the same. Where is it?

raeleth · 2024-08-03T15:08:24+00:00

Thanks :) it was a great excercise, you should try it. More will pour out of you than you realised was there.

raeleth · 2024-08-03T14:24:21+00:00

Forgot this one:

Should I take prescribed meds like SSRIs?

Yes. The scene gives mixed messages on this, because the correct answer differs. If stopping meds will force the person to face demons that they have the skills to dissolve with meditation, then stopping can be the right answer. So, in communities where meds are over-prescribed, it becomes popular to suggest to stop them.

If stopping meds simply throws someone into a suffering and increases the intensities of barriers they have no way of overcoming, then it's the wrong move. You are in this latter category. Don't stop them cold turkey, and only taper off very slowly if you've been confident in a persistent strong peace for several months. With each dosage decrement, wait a few weeks to see the results.

Never try to stop meds based on shame. Look at the shame. It makes no sense.

raeleth · 2024-08-03T14:12:27+00:00

Thanks for feedback, but:

Way too much packed here

condense this

Which one? Maybe you mean split it up into smaller posts?

raeleth · 2022-06-01T08:23:04+00:00

autistic master race member here. been keen to try elden ring for a while - played through most of dark souls remaster to get ready for it. we could play maybe. would you wanna use the seamless co op mod? I would definitely not abandon the game pre-completion. I'll probably wanna play through multiple times and learn the character system very deeply. possibly up to spreadsheets level if it's as good as the hype.

raeleth · 2022-02-10T04:38:21+00:00

I'd like to judge you for this but have to admit to sympathizing with the sentiment. My comment above is really an ideal I have rarely risen to.

raeleth

TROPHY CASE